Part 39 (1/2)

A young man should ask the young ladies, daughters or relatives of the hostess, for their company in the dance early in the evening. A married gentleman should be general in his attentions in the ball-room. He should not dance more than once or twice with his wife, nor should he take her out to supper; but he must keep a quiet outlook over her comfort, and see that she is no wise lonely or neglected.

Attentions Paid to Ladies.

Neither should he confine his attentions in a marked manner to any one lady. It is ill-breeding to excite the comment sure to follow such a course. It is also bad form for any gentleman to confine his attentions to any one lady, or, as a rule, to ask her for more than two dances. Even engaged couples are not exempt from this law.

Gentlemen may put down their name on a lady's program for certain dances, and the engagement should never be forgotten. If, however, this lapse should occur, the humblest apology should follow, which the young lady, no matter how annoyed, should gracefully accept. Ill-humor is out of place in the ball-room.

If a lady from weariness, or any other cause, should wish to stop at any time in the dance, the gentleman must, without any comment, at once lead her to a seat, and remain with her until the set is finished, notwithstanding that she may, from a spirit of kindness, request him to seek another partner. Should she show symptoms of weariness, and be either too timid or too thoughtful for his enjoyment to ask him to take her from the floor, he should be quick to see, and to suggest that she rest for a moment.

Gloves form an important adjunct to a gentleman's toilet for a dancing party. Light colored gloves are always good form. Gentlemen are expected to wear gloves while dancing, since their ungloved hands would not only soil the delicate tints of the lady's gloves, but the slightest pressure of a warm, uncovered hand is liable to discolor the frail gauzes, or pale silks of their ball-room toilet.

It is not amiss to be provided with an extra pair of gloves which will be very useful should the first pair come to grief. Upon the same principle, two fresh handkerchiefs should be carried.

If dancing is not formally announced in the invitation, gentlemen will do well to provide themselves with gloves to be donned if that amus.e.m.e.nt is introduced in the course of the evening. Notwithstanding the royal indolence or whim of the Prince of Wales led him some time back to discard the use of gloves at evening parties, an example which many ultra-fas.h.i.+onables have followed, it still remains that gloves are both proper and necessary. If a gentleman attempts to dance without them he must hold his handkerchief in his hand in such a manner as to prevent its contact with the bodice of the lady's gown.

Loud talking and boisterous laughter are not to be tolerated.

Scrupulously avoid stepping upon the train of a lady's gown. Apologize if it accidentally occurs, and if serious damage ensue from the awkwardness, beg the privilege of taking her to the dressing-room to have the damage repaired.

For Ladies.

Young ladies must never refuse to dance with one gentleman, and afterward give the same dance to a more favored suitor. Nothing so quickly speaks of ill-breeding as this course. Ball-room engagements should not be forgotten. Young ladies should never be so unwise as to appear on the floor at every dance.

Daughters of the hostess should not repeatedly appear upon the floor while other lady guests are neglected. Not their own pleasure, but the pleasure of the company should be their first care.

Ladies should not cross the ball-room alone. It invites attention.

Ladies must not burden gentlemen (unless husband or near relative) with bouquet or fan to hold while they dance. Young ladies should not refuse a ball-room introduction to a gentleman without a sufficient reason, since to do so is always an embarra.s.sment to the one asking it. Still a lady has the privilege of refusal and may not be pressed for a reason. Young chaperons should never dance while their _proteges_ are unprovided with partners.

[Ill.u.s.tration: SCENE AT A RAILWAY STATION IN PARIS.]

A lady removes at least one glove while partaking of supper. But when a cup of tea, or an ice, only is taken this is not necessary.

DANCING.

Pope says: ”They move easiest who have learned to dance,” and while the opinions of society are greatly divided on the subject of this amus.e.m.e.nt, it cannot be denied that there is much truth in the a.s.surance that Locke gives us in his treatise on ”Education:”

”Since nothing appears to me to give children so much becoming confidence and behavior as dancing, I think they should be taught to dance as soon as they are capable of learning it. For though this consists only in outward gracefulness of motion, ... yet it gives children manly thoughts and courage more than anything.”

For the many, however, to whom these early advantages have not been given, while the dowry of a quick ear and natural grace has enabled them to ”pick up” this social accomplishment, a few hints may be of use.

Dancing is really an art, and one that the gentleman especially should understand (since he takes the lead) before he ventures to ask a lady out upon the floor.

The gentleman should be very careful in the manner of holding his partner. He should give her proper support by putting his arm firmly around her, but not drawing her too close. Her right hand should be held in his left, the lady turning the right palm downward and almost straightening her right arm. The gentleman should bend his left arm slightly backward. The joined hands should be held steadily but kept away from the gentleman's body. To rest them upon his hip, is actual vulgarity. The gentleman's right shoulder and the lady's left, should be kept as far apart as the other shoulders, hence his right elbow must not be too much bent. The upper part of the body should be kept quiet, and the head held naturally, not turned one side, while the eyes are neither thrown up nor cast down in an affected style. Their steps should be in harmony and the gentleman must be very careful not to permit a collision with other couples.

At every slightest pause in the dance the gentleman should instantly drop his arm from the lady's waist. In these intervals it is proper to fan her if she desire it, and to enter into chatty conversation.

Gentlemen avoid all boisterous conduct in the dance, such as swinging a partner too rapidly, or lifting her too much from the floor. She, on her part, should dance lightly, never permitting her partner to carry her around, but performing her share well, or not dance at all.