Part 15 (1/2)
”It was undoubtedly the most humiliating moment of my life.”
Dylan keeps squinting and then smiles wide.
”I'm sorry,” she says, ”I know it's not funny, I'm sorry. But why why?”
”I don't know. I was just lonely, I guess.” I peel a strip off an old flyer stapled to the pole, advertising a garage sale that happened last weekend. I stuff the strip into my hand and peel another.
I try again: ”So, we'll go over together, right? On Friday?”
I don't look at Dylan, just peel off another strip. It says HOUSEHOLD appliances! FURNITURE! KNICK-KNACKS! I wait for her to answer.
She doesn't say anything.
I pry a staple out of the wood.
”I really want to see Maddy act,” I say.
I try to remember what Maddy said about the light, the aura. I crumple the paper into a ball and put it in my pocket.
Finally, Dylan sighs. ”Look,” she says. ”I don't want to make a huge thing out of this, but I like to be direct about things. I don't know what happened to you at lunch that day, but I have a feeling that it had to do with Ingrid. So, I just want to make this clear: I'm not a replacement for her. If you're trying to make that happen, our friends.h.i.+p isn't going to work. It's not what I want, and it shouldn't be what you want, either.”
I sit down next to her. She's looking at me in the way only she can, with all this intensity, not self-conscious at all.
”That's not what I want,” I say. Dylan doesn't respond, so I know I have to try harder.
”Remember that day when I showed you the theater?” I ask.
”Yeah.”
”You told me that you chose me to be your friend.”
”Okay,” she says, half defensive, half embarra.s.sed. she says, half defensive, half embarra.s.sed.
”Well,” I say. ”It's my turn. I choose you.”
”What?”
”I choose you. You're my friend now. If I have to stalk you at your locker and, like, beg beg you to go eat with me after school, and trespa.s.s in your backyard, I will.” you to go eat with me after school, and trespa.s.s in your backyard, I will.”
Dylan rolls her eyes, but when she smiles, her intensity fades into something warmer. ”Fine.”
”So we'll eat lunch together tomorrow. Preferably not in the bathroom, because even though it's really nice in there, I could use a change of scene.”
”But wait,” Dylan says, all sarcastically. ”If memory serves me correctly, school bathrooms are some of my favorite places.”
”If Maddy comes out here one day, you guys can make out in there all you want, but I'd like to eat on the soccer field.”
”Okay, fair.” Dylan nods.
”And we're going to the play on Friday.”
”Fine, but you should ask Taylor because Maddy and I are going to want to hang out after.”
”Oh.” I nod knowingly. ”Hang out.” ”Hang out.”
”You may need to be entertained.”
”Okay,” I say.
”Okay.” She nods. ”Good.”
16.
After dinner on Sunday night, the phone rings.
”h.e.l.lo, is this Caitlin?” a woman asks.
”Yeah?”
”Caitlin, this is Veena.”
The phone suddenly seems heavy.
”Veena Delani.”
”Oh,” I manage. ”Hi.”
”I wonder if I could schedule a meeting with you for Monday. Before cla.s.s, or during break. There's something I'd like to discuss with you.”
”I'm sorry about sneaking in,” I say. ”I won't do it anymore.”
”That's not what I want to meet with you about.”
”Oh,” I say. ”Well, I didn't want to look at myself like that.”
”Sorry?” she asks.
”That's why I didn't turn in a self-portrait.”
She says, ”Yes, I had noticed that you missed the a.s.signment. To be honest, I'm worried about your standing in the cla.s.s in general.”
I don't really know what to say to that, so I don't say anything. ”So, when can you meet?”
”I guess before cla.s.s would work,” I say.