Part 13 (1/2)
I stopped the eunuch and asked Sun Pao-tien to continue.
”My colleague and I found out that Her Majesty's breathing has been constricted by phlegm. We have been trying to find a way to suck it out.”
”It was not working!” all the eunuchs cried in unison.
I asked why I hadn't been informed.
”My lady didn't want the court, and especially you, to be told. She believed that she would be fine in no time.”
”Have you any proof?”
”Here.” The eunuch fumbled in his pockets and produced a piece of wrinkled paper. ”My lady signed the instructions.” Tears and mucus had gathered at the tip of the eunuch's nose and dripped. ”She came back miraculously last time. So we thought she would get over this attack.”
”Last time? What do you mean? This has happened before?” What do you mean? This has happened before?”
”Yes. The first time was when my lady was twenty-six years old, and then again when she was thirty-three. This time I am afraid she will not survive.”
When I rushed to Nuharoo's palace, sounds of crying filled the air. The courtyard was packed with people. Seeing me, the crowd made way. I arrived at Nuharoo's bedside and found her practically buried in fresh gardenias. Doctor Sun Pao-tien was at her side.
It shocked me how illness had changed her appearance. Her eyebrows were in the shape of a big knot and her mouth sagged to one side. Her breathing was labored and there was a gurgling noise in her throat.
”Take away the flowers,” I ordered.
None of the attendants moved.
”How can she breathe with the flowers weighing on her chest?”
The eunuchs threw themselves down. ”It is what Her Majesty wanted.”
”Nuharoo,” I whispered.
”She can't hear you,” said the doctor.
”How can this be? For years she was not ill for even a day!”
”Her duties at court have worn her out,” the doctor explained. ”She may not last the night.”
A few minutes later Nuharoo opened her eyes. ”You came in time, Yehonala,” she said. ”I get to say goodbye.”
”Nonsense, Nuharoo.” I bent down. When I touched her pale, thin shoulder, my tears came.
”Bury me with my gardenias,” she said. ”The court will want to bury me their way. You make sure that I don't get bullied in death.”
”Whatever you say, Nuharoo. But you are not going to die.”
”My way is the only way, Yehonala.”
”Oh, my dear Nuharoo, you promised that you wouldn't drive yourself so.”
”I didn't.” She closed her eyes. A eunuch wiped her face with a towel. ”I didn't quit because I didn't want to embarra.s.s myself.”
”What is there to be embarra.s.sed about?”
”I wanted to show ... that I was as good as you.”
”But you are, Nuharoo.”
”That's a lousy lie, Yehonala. You are happy because I am going to be out of your way for good.”
”Please, Nuharoo...”
”You can order the eunuchs to get rid of their brooms now.”
”What are you talking about?”
”You can collect the fall leaves, pile them as high as you want in the courtyards. The h.e.l.l with stains on the marble.”
I listened and wept.
”Buddha is on the other side waiting for me.”
”Nuharoo...”
She raised her hand. ”Stop, Yehonala. Death is ugly. I've got nothing left.”
I held her hand. It was cold, and her fingers felt like a bundle of chopsticks.
”There is honor, Nuharoo.”
”You would think I care.”
”You have saved up plenty of virtue, Nuharoo. Your next life will be a splendid one.”
”I have been living inside these walls...” Her voice drifted. ”Only the dusty winds of the desert penetrated...” She turned slowly to face the ceiling. ”Two and a half miles of walls and the two hundred and fifty acres enclosed have been my world and yours, Yehonala. I will not call you Orchid. I promised myself.”
”Of course not, Nuharoo.”
”No more rehearsing the protocols ... the endless comedy of manners...” She paused to catch her breath. ”Only a practiced ear could detect the real meaning of a word wrapped in filigree ... the idea hidden in amber.”
”Oh, yes, Empress Nuharoo.”
A half hour later, Nuharoo ordered that she be left alone with me.
When the room was cleared, I pulled over two thick pillows and sat her up. Her neck, her hair and her inner robe were sweat-soaked.
”Will you,” she began, ”forgive me?”