Part 11 (1/2)
Was it not thou who thus didst stoop To whisper comfort, love and hope?
Who art thou? Guardian angel sent Or torturer malevolent?
Doubt and uncertainty decide: All this may be an empty dream, Delusions of a mind untried, Providence otherwise may deem-- Then be it so! My destiny From henceforth I confide to thee!
Lo! at thy feet my tears I pour And thy protection I implore.
Imagine! Here alone am I!
No one my anguish comprehends, At times my reason almost bends, And silently I here must die-- But I await thee: scarce alive My heart with but one look revive; Or to disturb my dreams approach Alas! with merited reproach.
'Tis finished. Horrible to read!
With shame I shudder and with dread-- But boldly I myself resign: Thine honour is my countersign!
x.x.xIV
Tattiana moans and now she sighs And in her grasp the letter shakes, Even the rosy wafer dries Upon her tongue which fever bakes.
Her head upon her breast declines And an enchanting shoulder s.h.i.+nes From her half-open vest of night.
But lo! already the moon's light Is waning. Yonder valley deep Looms gray behind the mist and morn Silvers the brook; the shepherd's horn Arouses rustics from their sleep.
'Tis day, the family downstairs, But nought for this Tattiana cares.
x.x.xV
The break of day she doth not see, But sits in bed with air depressed, Nor on the letter yet hath she The image of her seal impressed.
But gray Phillippevna the door Opened with care, and entering bore A cup of tea upon a tray.
”'Tis time, my child, arise, I pray!
My beauty, thou art ready too.
My morning birdie, yesternight I was half silly with affright.
But praised be G.o.d! in health art thou!
The pains of night have wholly fled, Thy cheek is as a poppy red!”
x.x.xVI
”Ah! nurse, a favour do for me!”
”Command me, darling, what you choose”
”Do not--you might--suspicious be; But look you--ah! do not refuse.”
”I call to witness G.o.d on high--”
”Then send your grandson quietly To take this letter to O-- Well!
Unto our neighbour. Mind you tell-- Command him not to say a word-- I mean my name not to repeat.”
”To whom is it to go, my sweet?
Of late I have been quite absurd,-- So many neighbours here exist-- Am I to go through the whole list?”
x.x.xVII
”How dull you are this morning, nurse!”
”My darling, growing old am I!
In age the memory gets worse, But I was sharp in times gone by.
In times gone by thy bare command--”
”Oh! nurse, nurse, you don't understand!
What is thy cleverness to me?
The letter is the thing, you see,-- Oneguine's letter!”--”Ah! the thing!