Part 16 (1/2)

Hence the bottle of highly inferior whiskey, obtained at an appalling cost from an individual known to the boys as the One-Eyed Tout, who resided in the adjacent village, and whose visits to the school (events which the vigilance of the authorities rendered infrequent and furtive) were invariably for some nefarious purpose. It is true that Linklater did not like whiskey, though plenty of hot water and sugar enabled him to swallow it with a fair show of enjoyment. But it was forbidden fruit.

Few of us, from Eve downwards, have ever been able to withstand that temptation, and, as his dormitory parties had been perforce discontinued, Linklater conceived the happy notion of giving a ”small and early” in his own study. And on these hospitable thoughts intent he invited Kelly and Hicks to ”look in” directly after prayers if they wanted ”a little something, hot.”

Kelly and Hicks both nodded knowingly, and accepted the invitation with much pleasure. Their sentiments were perfectly genuine. In the first place, it is gratifying for ordinary house-bullies to be noticed by a celebrity in the Eleven; and in the second, it is comforting to feel that in the event of a collision with the powers that be, the entire responsibility will fall upon the exalted shoulders of your host.

Bedtime at Grandwich lasted from nine-thirty till ten-fifteen. The school retired to roost in detachments--”squeakers” at half-past nine, Middle School at ten, and the Sixth at a quarter-past. At that hour the senior boy was supposed to turn off the gas, and slumber reigned officially till six-forty-five the following morning.

The dormitory cubicles, as has already been mentioned, possessed no doors, and the part.i.tions were only seven feet high. Each cubicle was entered by an opening some three feet wide, across the top of which ran a stout wooden bar. The bar, originally devised to strengthen the framework of the doorway, had been used for generations by Grandwich boys for the performance of gymnastic exercises. Indeed, it was inc.u.mbent upon every newcomer, after he had been a member of the school a fortnight, to do six ”press-ups” on his cubicle-bar, under penalty of continuous and painful a.s.sistance (with a slipper) from the rest of the dormitory until proficiency was attained.

On the evening of Linklater's party, Pip arrived in the dormitory, as was his custom, shortly before ten, and after attiring himself in his pyjamas proceeded to his usual exercises. Five minutes' club-swinging warmed his blood nicely; and he had just completed his preliminary ”toe-and-up,” and was sitting balanced on the bar, when the dormitory door, which adjoined the entrance to his cubicle, suddenly swung open, and Linklater appeared upon the threshold. He was singing, blindly, l.u.s.tily, raucously; and Pip realised at a glance that the ”straw thing”

_had_ contained a bottle, and that his friend was now a fully-qualified candidate for ”the sack.”

Linklater arrived opposite Pip's cubicle, where he drew up with a slight lurch and a suggestion of a hiccup. Small boys, who, attracted by his corybantic entrance, had come to the doors of their cubicles to see what the matter was, regarded him furtively with looks of mingled fear and amus.e.m.e.nt.

Pip slipped off his bar.

”Have you been making that filthy row all the way up from your study?”

he inquired.

Linklater turned a slightly glazed eye upon him, and nodded.

”In that case,” said Pip, ”you'll probably have Chilly up any moment. If he catches you like this you'll get sacked--do you understand?--_sacked!_ Go to bed, quick--you swine!”

He took his bemused friend by the shoulder and turned him in the right direction. But two gla.s.ses of toddy held firm sway in Linklater's unaccustomed interior, and for the moment Dutch courage was the order of the day.

”Think I care?” he roared. ”Where _is_ old Chilly? Let me get at him!

Chilly be--”

”There he is!--downstairs--now!” hissed Pip in his ear. ”Get to your cubicle and into bed, as quick as you can. I'll try to keep him down at my end; but if he comes along to you, pretend to be asleep. It's your only chance.”

All the time he was hustling the highly indignant Linklater towards his cubicle. Downstairs Mr. Chilford's high voice could be heard querulously announcing its owner's determination to unearth ”the perpetrator of this outrage.”

For a moment it seemed as if Pip's determined strategy would succeed.

But just at the entrance to his cubicle Linklater broke away with a sudden twist, and in a moment was flying down the dormitory again with the avowed intention of interviewing his house-master.

”Where is the blighter?” he shrieked. ”Lead me to him, and I'll--Pip, you cad, leave me alone! Help! rescue! cad--hrrrumph!”

The last e.j.a.c.u.l.a.t.i.o.n was caused by sudden contact with his own pillow, for Pip, losing all patience, fairly picked him up in his arms, and, carrying him kicking and struggling the whole length of the dormitory, through a double rank of trembling and ecstatic f.a.gs, heaved him through the doorway of his cubicle on to his bed.

”Get him into bed and sit on his head,” he whispered rapidly to the two biggest boys present. ”Chilly is coming upstairs now. Never mind his clothes. Quick!”

His lieutenants, though they risked a heavy punishment for being found in another boy's cubicle, turned to their task with the utmost cheerfulness and vigour, while Pip raced down the dormitory to repel the invader. When that well-meaning but incompetent pedagogue entered the door Pip was preening himself upon his cubicle-bar.

Mr. Chilford began at once--

”Wilmot, what is the meaning of this disgraceful disturbance? I insist upon having the names of those responsible. Do you hear? I insist, I say,--I insist!”

”Disturbance, sir?” said Pip blankly.