Chapter 47 (1/2)
A good storyintricate webs of conflict that leads to a cathartic payoff The beauty and tragedy in Lost You Forever is that the conflict happens around characters that I love, and if I were to splice the three ether into one super character then that would be the only satisfying solution Anything else leavesole pity fest that is long overdue Xiang Liu basically stabbed h the heart in the last episode, just like Xiao Yao stabbed him in the heart with an arrow and then declared she never ever wanted to see hi the assassination atteer one more time and make the same declaration to another man who loves her I can’t say this could have been avoided if she wereLiu is correct in his snarky way that he has no obligation to clue her in on the critical point One of Xiao Yao’s bad habits is running away but now it’s time for her to finally face the music
Ch 47 – No One to Share in the Sorrowful Desolation
Xiao Yao had lost too ravely weakened Miao Pu fed her lots of elixirs and potions but Xiao Yao still slept through the entire night Thankfully Zhuan Xu was preoccupied at the arht By then Xiao Yao ake and after putting onto and fro, he didn’t notice anything was off about Xiao Yao
Xiao Yao kept drinking the elixirs like water, but she was still so weakened that the healing couldn’t happen overnight She was tired and sleepy all day, and would often sit in the corridor leaning against the bannister staring in a daze at the flowers Zhuan Xu thought she wasMiao Pu and Left Ear to spend more time with her and help cheer her up
After a few days rest Xiao Yao was finally back to nor and Ru So arrived at the army base with the backup provisions Zhuan Xu provided explicit instructions before taking Xiao Yao back to Sheng Nong Mountain
Feng Long was the Chi Sui clan leader, and also the son of Sheng Nong nobility Little Zhu Rong His death left a huge burden for Zhuan Xu to handle so he immediately met with the Yellow Emperor to discuss the s are both a curse and a blessing, if you handle this well it can be both Feng Long’s unexpected death, aside fro for the future of the kingdom”
Zhuan Xu paused to think about it and understood what the Yellow Eeneral and still had strong ties with many Middle Plains families If it was détente then no one would need to pick sides, but now that it was the final war then ht feel torn on who to support But with Feng Long’s death at the hand of Gong Gong’s subordinate, the Chi Sui clan and the Sheng Nong tribe would never ever forgive Gong Gong Now all the Middle Plains fa’s death, it actually severed whatever the re and the Middle Plains completely
Zhuan Xu bowed to the Yellow Emperor “Thank Grandfather for your wisdohed “It’s not that you didn’t knohat to do, it’s just that Feng Long’s death really affected you It’s clear you really saw hi’s last words and grew silent
The Yellow E Yue doesn’t matter, you can do what you ith her and I wouldn’t care But now that Feng Long is dead, you have to treat her well Later when you go back to Zhi Jin Palace, pay her a visit!”
“Feng Long said before he died that he has nothing left behind he wouldYue I already pro Yue a lifetime of peace and have all the consorts in the Palace respect her as the Ehed again “Feng Long, that child really is so loyal and caring No wonder he insisted on going to war because it was all for Xing Yue”
Zhuan Xu said “It looks like Xiang Liu killed Feng Long but in truth he was killed by Xing Yue! If it wasn’t for Feng Long I would………Sheng Nong Xing Yue!” All the bottled up rage fro up and his hands clenched into fists before he smashed the cups on the table
The Yellow E Yue want to kill Xiao Yao in the first place? If she didn’t try to kill Xiao Yao, ould Feng Long be forced to put hiave you the choice and you chose to forsake love for the greater good of the world! This whole time you’ve never disappointed reatly disappointed me!”
Since the Yellow Emperor abdicated the throne to Zhuan Xu, he was alarm towards him so this was the first time the Yellow Erandfather and then said “I know, I did behave irresponsibly for my own selfish reason Since my dad died and my mom committed suicide, I’ve strictly controlledmyself do as I want InI have selfishly asked for Grandfather – please agree to it!”
The Yellow Emperor looked down, how could he not kno Zhuan Xu felt His expression war’s death isn’t properly handled it could be a huge mess Hurry back to Zhi Jin Peak now to take care of it Always remember that you are the ruler of the entire world, you need to put the interests of the entire world first always”
Zhuan Xu silently bowed to the Yellow Emperor and left
As Zhuan Xu passed by the phoenix tree forest, he stared at the swing and wondered what Xiao Yao was thinking
Miao Pu ran over and bowed “Miss asks Your Majesty to go see her before you leave, she has so to say to you”
Zhuan Xu slass of wine and handed one to Zhuan Xu before pouring it on the ground as a toast for Feng Long
Xiao Yao then said “Before Feng Long went to war, he asked me a favor that I want to help with now, especially since I couldn’t save him”
Zhuan Xu furrowed his brow and said i Yue then I’ve already prohed “It’s what I thought, you ive Xing Yue And with Feng Long’s death, you’ll only becousted with her Even if you keep your pro Yue especially so, she will be able to sense how you really feel about her”
Zhuan Xu said coldly “I’ll do what needs to be done with her”
Xiao Yao said “Actually, Xing Yue and I are somewhat similar We are both kids who had to carry the burden of our parents I was left by my mom at Jade Mountain, she was left by her dad at Xuan Yuan Castle The unhappiness of our childhood left our hearts cold and hard, and when necessary we can be heartless and deadly wo Yue relies on her family but cannot trust therandfather…they all have even ations, so she can only rely on herself So she is nervous, suspicious, stubborn, heartless I don’t ask that you stop hating her but I hope that each time you see her you will pity her a bit, in the end she wasn’t born this way”
Zhuan Xu said “Xiao Yao, she is nothing like you! Perhaps you both have cold hearts but you treasure every bit of happiness after the hardshi+p you went through Whether it’s Master, Ah Nian, Lao Mu, Miao Pu, Left Ear, no rateful With Xing Yue, her childhood hardshi+pive her if one doesn’t accede to her wishes then she will toss it all out and feel jilted Little Zhu Rong and Feng Long did a lot for her As for ave her the position and power as Empress She knows it’s a deal with me yet she still wants me to treat her like I treat you She’s not the only one in this world she suffered!”
Xiao Yao said “I’ Yue, but also for yourself, to treat her well”
Zhuan Xu said “Don’t worry, I knohat to do”
Xiao Yao said “It’s getting late, you hurry back and I won’t walk you out”
After Zhuan Xu left, Xiao Yao sat there silently in a daze, and waved Miao Pu off fro her
Xiao Yao used the wine on her fingers to write nae with the Tu Shan clan: The Fang Feng fa clan, Yu Jiang…Xiao Yao even wrote Xiang Liu’s name down
Xiao Yao pondered all the possibilities butHer hand paused over Xiang Liu’s na Liu – there was a chance that the thief was screaht not be useful to Xiang Liu directly, but could lead to countless trouble for Zhuan Xu which is good for Gong Gong And telling Xiao Yao now, she could kill countless powerful people to avenge Jing, which would also be good in causing chaos for Zhuan Xu
Xiao Yao used her finger to write Xiang Liu’s name over and over – is it you? Is it really you?
Miao Pu glanced at the na all these names down?”
Xiao Yao smiled and wiped all the names away Miao Pu shuddered because Xiao Yao’s expression was just like His Majesty’s expression when he ordered Xiao Xiao to kill – a brief glance and death was to follow
“Left Ear” Xiao Yao called She sent him to attempt assassinations on her various suspects, not to kill theuards for protection
Miao Pu looked worried and ran after Left Ear “Hey, you wait up Let s for you Reet too close Just er” After so hurt
Xiao Yao laughed “Don’t be worried, Left Ear is ser than you think”
Miao Pu said angrily “I’m not worried about hiuy with no manners!”
Xiao Yao shook her head with a wry s what you really feel
After half a year of investigating, all the na Liu Xiao Yao thought day and night, and kept writing his name over and over on the table So over and over “did you do it?”
Miao Pu was so worried about Xiao Yao Sometimes she was like a child abandoned by parents, confused and devastated, other times she was like the sharpest sithout a sheath, coldly cutting anyone down If it was usual ti was off about Xiao Yao, but with Feng Long’s death he was so busy that all his visits were either short or discussing matters with the Yellow Emperor
Xiao Xiao asked Miao Pu about Xiao Yao but Miao Pu didn’t dare tell the truth – hersaid was betrayal so she said everything was fine as usual
Xiao Yao laid on her pallet writing Xiang Liu over and over again Miao Pu finally couldn’t hold it anymore and asked “Miss, why do you write this na is it you, or is it not you, all the ti whether he did it or not And if he did it, how do I confirm it?”
Miao Pu understood now and asked “What if he didn’t do it?”
“If he didn’t do it, then another powerful person did it But no one is left, I’ve investigated all suspects, so did I miss someone?” Xiao Yao rapped her own head in frustration
Miao Pu hurriedly stopped her “Miss! Miss!”
Xiao Yao flopped on the pallet and noticed Left Ear behind Miao Pu, his dark eyes were glinting like a predator and staring intently at Xiao Yao
Xiao Yao asked “What do you want to say?”
Left Ear angrily said “It’s not Xiang Liu! There is one very powerful person you missed”
Xiao Yao blinked in shock, there was someone she couldn’t think of that Left Ear knew “Who?”
“His Majesty”
Xiao Yao bolted up and furiously scowled “What nonsense are you spouting!”
Left Ear looked confused and asked “Did I say anything wrong? His Majesty is not powerful? Then er lessened seeing Left Ear like this so she patiently explained “His Majesty is very powerful, yes, and he can be considered the most powerful person in the entire world But you’re not understanding what I’ to do…” Xiao Yao glanced at Miao Pu who ran out of the room with her hands over her ears “His Majesty has no conflict with Jing, and even less profit to gain from his death”
Left Ear coolly said “They have conflict with each other”
Xiao Yao was so frustrated by now “Do you know them better than me? Do you knohat conflictfor the best home, the best land, the best prey”
“Fine, so even if conflict is as explained by beasts is true, what is Jing and His Majesty fighting over?”
“Every Spring, aside froht over a female beast both want The ht”
Xiao Yao finally understood what Left Ear was getting at and scowled “You, you……”
Left Ear continued “His Majesty and Jing both want you, and if neither is willing to give up then they can only fight it out”
Xiao Yao slapped the pallet hard “Coet out!”
Left Ear iulp down some water “Nonsense! How can people be like beasts!”
Xiao Yao tried to put Left Ear’s words aside but gradually it started to eat away at her when she continued investigating Jing’s death Zhuan Xu would enter her thoughts and Xiao Yao would iradually little details she
She re on his deathbed, that he only ever entrusted his beloved Xiao Yao to Feng Long
Xiao Yao knew Zhuan Xu didn’t really like Jing, but she thought it was because Jing broke Xiao Yao’s heart before, or Zhuan Xu thought Jing wasn’t good enough for Xiao Yao At least Zhuan Xu certainly thought Feng Long wasfor her toBut know she kne Zhuan Xu felt about her, , so Xiao Yao went back through herof the past
When her Dad issued a procla Eldest Princess, her Grandfather wanted to give her the Xuan Yuan last name so she could be the Xuan Yuan Princess and had the most illustrious last na Xiao Yao the Xi Ling last naued over it Back then Xiao Yao picked the Xi Ling last na’s level, which is why she never thought about why Zhuan Xu wouldn’t let her become the Xuan Yuan Princess
On the eve of his o or to congratulate him
Xiao Yao re Garden
Around dusk, Zhuan Xu came by Xiao Yue Peak and saw Xiao Yao lazily sprawled on the pallet He walked over and sat down “What’s wrong? Heard you’ve been down lately, and not eating ain?”
“Also thinking about a lot of things with you Re Yue, Hou……and now everyone is gone or dead, and even Jing has left me”
Zhuan Xu ordered Miao Pu “Get some wine”, and then poured Xiao Yao a cup Xiao Yao drank the wine and s is , thinking he doesn’t have grander a money for the Tu Shan clan, and he’s weak and too kind when it co”
Zhuan Xu re said to hiulped down the wine and didn’t deny it “I did think that way”
Xiao Yao said “You all think that I saved Jing’s life and he just glo who saved me”
Zhuan Xu stared in disbelief at Xiao Yao
Xiao Yao continued “When I left Jade Mountain, I was just a kid who knew nothing Later I encountered all those horrible things, I only glanced over it when telling you and didn’t share all the details I didn’t forget any of it, it’s just those tens of years of agony and shae by the nine-tailed fox, he would beatthings I lived even worse than an animal I hated everyone I could possibly hate – I hated thehtmare I may have survived in the end but , he was dirtier than then dirtiest beggar I saved him in a split second’s kindness and didn’t actual care if he lived or died But when I discovered all the wounds and bruises on his body, it re desire for hiet past it, if Jing could survive I endured the sa, so I kno it can turn a person extreme, cold, suspicious, and how hard it is to be so did it! He showed me, proved to me, that no matter how others have treated us, we can choose to still be kind and good and forgiving Gege, you ht see him as weak and indecisive but you tell me, if one day I betrayed you in the worst way, can you just kill me afterwards?”
Zhuan Xu said with certainty “You would never betray ht about Hou? He was Jing’s most trusted beloved older brother Until Hou did what he did, Jing was like you today, believing co would turn cold and suspicious after what Hou did to him, and actions would be decisive and heartless, like both of us have becoe, don’t you think that’s another kind of strength and courage? It appears different than us, but Jing is using his own ”
Zhuan Xu was silent but he agreed, soic on political e on Hou
Xiao Yao said “Jing clearly sahat kind of person I aive first, won’t take a chance, so he told ive first, he will take a chance When he said that, he already did soin hiht it was possible to do it for a tie, today’s real is not toh, could you still say that you will give first, you will take a chance? Are you even willing to do that?”
Zhuan Xu had no reply to that
Xiao Yao added “You and I are the sa hard to get close to me, but I never fully trusted him, and in fact alas ready to fully retreat at any e,to be with a person like me!”
Zhuan Xu coolly said “Perhaps he did a lot for you, but all I saas you spitting up blood because of hihed “Yes, that was Jing’s mistake, but I wasn’t blameless either I could have handled thefro him to prove himself togiving, staying together requires both sides working at it We both made mistakes, so we both endured the punishis all”
Zhuan Xu kept trying not to think about what Feng Long said before he died but his words gnawed at hiht now his frustration burst forth and Zhuan Xu i is athe wine cup in Xiao Yao’s hand shattered
Zhuan Xu quickly took her hand and cleaned the shards froot intowhat you want to say, I’ll just listen”
Zhuan Xu’s head was lowered as he carefully bandaged her wound, and it was just a typical wound but Zhuan Xu was so gentle and careful as if Xiao Yao’s pal off
Xiao Yao stared at Zhuan Xu as i aboutZhuan Xu to never let the girl go once he finds the one he loves, Xiang Liu saying with a laugh that Jing’s death appears a brotherly fight on the surface but in truth a very powerful person wanted Jing dead
Xiao Yao’s tears fell, one after another like pearls, hitting Zhuan Xu’s hand so he raised his head and worriedly asked “What is it? Does it hurt that
Zhuan Xu frantically asked “Xiao Yao, Xiao Yao, where are you hurting? I’ll summon Yin immediately!”
Xiao Yao asked “Was it you who sent people to Qing Shui Town to help Tu Shan Hou”
Zhuan Xu frozeXiao Yao’s hand so she felt the jolt Zhuan Xu asked “Why are you asking this?”
“I want to know the truth Zhuan Xu, did you send people to help Tu Shan Hou?”
Zhuan Xu wanted to deny it but his pride wouldn’t allow him to so he said after a pause “It was ht she had experienced every type of pain in the world, but who knew thea knife and carving out your heart Every part of Xiao Yao hurt, her insides, her bones, her skin, her head, none of the pain she experienced in the past could hold a candle to this She was in such pain she wanted to die Xiao Yao closed her eyes, unable to look at Zhuan Xu “Get out!”
“Xiao Yao” Zhuan Xu tightly held onto her hand but her strength was shocking as she jerked her hand out of his and left a bloody gash where he just bandaged
“Xiao Yao!”
“Get! Out!” Xiao Yao howled and flipped the table, shattering everything on the ground Her face was ashen and her body teetered, like a leaf about to be consu waves
“Xiao Yao, listen to et the fuck out!” Xiao Yao’s hand appeared a silver bow and she pulled it back with her still closed Her tightly bit down on her lips as blood appeared
Zhuan Xu took steps back until he was at the door but he refused to step out Outside the door was a world without Xiao Yao, and he wasn’t going to go
The Yellow Emperor heard the ruckus and rushed over, one look at the two kids and he knew Xiao Yao learned the truth of Jing’s death He pulled Zhuan Xu out of the rooainst Xiao Yao He yelled at Zhuan Xu “Leave now! Don’t force Xiao Yao to kill you and kill herself!”
The Yellow Euards and ordered Xiao Xiao “Immediately take His Majesty back to Zhi Jin Sued ride and was just taking off when a bloodcurdling scream came from the room Zhuan Xu looked back and saw Xiao Yao open her eyes with blood dripping from her lips Her hands were also stained red with blood, while her dark eyes were ice cold, as if everything was dead to her, including herself
No s seemed, Xiao Yao was always by his side Every tiaze on hi at him with the coldest most heartless expression and Zhuan Xu felt like his entire insides were being ripped to shreds The pain was so stark he couldn’t even keep his seat on the winged ride and he collapsed on the saddle “Go back! I want to go back!” He wanted to order his winged ride to turn back but Xiao Xiao lassoed the winged ride’s neck and forcibly directed it to fly away
“Xiao Yao!” Zhuan Xu’s screa, trying to convey that he would do anything to protect her and give her happiness, but Xiao Yao could hear none of it Her grip released and a silver arrow landed in the winged ride killing it instantly Xiao Xiao pulled Zhuan Xu onto her winged ride with her quick reflexes
Another arroard and landed in Zhuan Xu’s hair top knot, freaking everyone out as screams pierced the air Zhuan Xu’s hair fanned around hi enough to avoid the hit but he had done nothing to evade her arrow Zhuan Xu suddenly saw the ie of his mother when she committed suicide, after she stabbed herself with the sword, her body was in grave pain and could barely stand, but she was srave So when love was just that deep, one really would rather die than losing it, and now Zhuan Xu finally understood his mother’s choice
Zhuan Xu tried to shake Xiao Xiao off and faced Xiao Yao’s arrow straight on – if they couldn’t live together then he would rather they died together!
The guards saw Xiao Yao pulling back another arrow and rushed forward to kill her but Zhuan Xu howled “Don’t hurt her! No one dare hurt her! Anyone hurt her will be killed!”
The Yellow Erabbed her arrow and said in sorrow “Xiao Yao, Zhuan Xu already made one mistake, you can’t randfather as her body swayed “You knew! You’ve all been lying to me!” Zhuan Xu and the Yellow Emperor were her only blood relatives left, and now both betrayed her!
The pain clenched Xiao Yao’s heart, and coupled with her shooting two arrows already, she was completely spent and the bow disappeared in her hand Her body toppled forward like a log right into the Yellow Emperor’s arms who turned to yell at Zhuan Xu in the sky “You’re still not leaving? Do you really want to force everyone here to die today!”
Zhuan Xu painfully closed his eyes as the histled past his ears, as if carrying with it the ain and loss in a lifetiretted any choice he made until now, this was the first ti?”