Part 24 (1/2)
”That's one way of looking at it,” he said.
”His cause was also evil. It's harder to maintain that.”
”Why are you here?” he asked, raising his head to meet her gaze, desperately trying to make sense of everything she was saying.
She looked at him for a long minute without speaking, and he began to wonder if she was ever going to again, or if she would just stare at him as if she could read his very soul.
”I'm sure Jenn's told you all about her grandfather and me. Well, I was never a revolutionary, not at heart.”
”But-”
She held up a hand to silence him. ”What I was was a woman in love with a revolutionary. And because I loved Charles, I stood by him through thick and thin, through years of running and hiding and everything else.” Her eyes took on a faraway look. Then she smiled faintly and directed her attention back to him.
”Now, this might surprise you, but my dad didn't exactly approve of Charles. In fact Papa disapproved with everything he had in him. Two men couldn't have been less alike. But in the end he saw how much I loved Charles, and how Charles looked after me the best he could.”
The conversation had taken a more comfortable turn. Antonio was from a time when the approval of fathers mattered in the affairs of the heart. ”Then he changed his mind?”
”We earned his approval, and kept earning it day after day.” She looked misty again, and Antonio thought of the countless widows who had attended the ma.s.ses at the chapel in Madrid, when he was preparing to take his vows. The grief. The desolation. Esther Leitner's happy memories made her burden lighter.
”I'm happy that you were able to make a life with the man you loved, but I don't understand what this has to do with me,” he said.
”Before Jenn came here, she never had a real boyfriend, so she never knew what it was like to have her heart broken.”
He bowed his head again, shame filling him.
”Now, a grandmother doesn't want to see some guy rip her granddaughter's heart out of her chest and stomp it into little pieces. Problem with you is that's a figurative danger and a literal one.”
”I know,” he whispered.
”In case you haven't noticed, Jenn's father isn't exactly around to object to you. So the burden falls on me.”
”To object to me,” he said. Of course she did; she must. He objected to himself. Why, then, did it hurt?
”Yes. Deeply.”
They stared at each other for a moment. He heard the beating of her heart, sure and steady.
”But I'm going to give you a chance,” she said.
He blinked, surprise mingling with something else-elation? Fear? He wasn't sure.
She reached out and flicked her wrist. There was the sound of metal grating on metal, and then suddenly she swung the cage door open. Reflexively, he sucked in a breath.
”Now be a man. Prove to me that you deserve her.”
Esther moved back, and Antonio took a hesitant step forward. Her words had cut him deep, stinging, burning, shaming. Could it really be as easy as she made it seem? Was it just a matter of faith and love and will? He squeezed his eyes shut and felt blood tears seeping from them. There was an ache in his heart that was lifting, twisting.
Had he imposed this prison, this h.e.l.l upon himself? Upon both of them? He wanted to tell Esther that he would try to be the man she was asking him to be. But he knew that trying wasn't enough. He couldn't try any longer.
He opened his eyes and looked at her. ”I will,” he vowed.
She nodded, and then turned and walked toward the door of the cold, dark room. He hesitated for a moment.
”Are you coming, then?” she asked without looking back.
”Yes,” he said, marveling at the strength, the resolve in his own voice. G.o.d help me to be the man I need to be and not the vampire I fear that I am, he prayed.
They climbed the stairs and eventually came out into the pa.s.sageway near the chapel.
Antonio heard Esther swear soft and low.
”What is it?” he asked, for her ears alone.
”Looks like I was wrong about one thing.”
Fear gripped him tight. ”What?” he asked, moving to see around her.
”Jenn's father is here.”
DOVER, ENGLAND.
SKYE AND JAMIE.
Running and hiding, running and hiding. It had become like a sick little game Skye and Jamie were playing. Hide-and-go-seek and Estefan was the seeker. Come out, come out, wherever you are, she could hear him in her mind, though there were times she thought she might just be imagining it.