Part 11 (1/2)

”No, you decided I wasn't going to talk to her anymore.”

His words shot through me like a knife. I stood, staring at him while I tried to digest what had just come out of his mouth.

Then, the thread snapped.

”You know what?” I screamed ”Go to h.e.l.l!”

I stomped past him and locked the bathroom door behind me. So many emotions rushed over me at once, I was faint. How stupid was I to fall for his c.r.a.p? I should've seen what was going on. All the progress we'd made was c.r.a.p. It was a delusion, my own sad attempt to save something that was obviously a waste of time. My hopes were crushed. Anger didn't even cover how I felt.

And he was an idiot. She was working her way back into his life with her bulls.h.i.+t intentions. He either didn't care, encouraged her, or he was just the most ridiculously clueless man on the planet. I was steering toward stupid, uncaring idiot.

Yeah, we'd taken a few steps in the right direction, but it wasn't nearly enough.

He'd opened up to me once. We'd had s.e.x more times in the prior month than we had in over six months, and he'd started sleeping in our bed more nights than not-but none of it was enough.

It was all superficial-Band-Aids, and badly applied.

I'd been too optimistic-too forgiving and nearly blind.

He'd gotten away with distracting me with what he thought I wanted-attention. Sure, I craved his attention, but what I needed was to know he truly wanted me-loved me, and was as committed to our marriage and family.

Kissing, touching, and hurried s.e.x wasn't going to fix things. We were back at square one as far as I was concerned.

I splashed some water on my face, wiped it dry, and stared at myself in the mirror. I did not like what I saw. I looked tired, weary, and lost. There was misery and fear written all over me. I wasn't fooling anyone, especially myself.

Once I felt like I had myself under control, I went back to my guests and tried to ignore the curious stares as I took my seat. I wasn't discussing it, no way in h.e.l.l. I was already freaking humiliated and hurt. I wasn't in a sharing mood.

”Sorry about that.”

”Dad left,” Skylar said quietly.

She wouldn't look at me-her eyes stayed pinned on her plate. I couldn't look at the other girls or the rest of my family and friends. G.o.d, how dare he treat me that way in front of everyone. There was no way they hadn't heard us fight. Our house wasn't big enough to get away with secret screaming matches.

”He must have had work to do. He's a very hard worker. He has to work so hard,” Sarah sighed sadly.

”It's Sat.u.r.day night, Sarah. What conceivable reason could he have to walk out on his family at dinner?” Tara snapped, grabbing her gla.s.s of Merlot and draining it. I could see her eyeball twitch from where I sat.

”It's none of your business, Tara. Stay out of it,” Glenn said from across the table. ”And apologize to my mother for talking to her that way.”

My eyes widened, and I shot a quick look over at Jason. He was shocked, and I didn't blame him a bit for being put off by the freaking antics. Jesus, he'd never want to be around any of us again.

”I didn't say anything that everyone at this table isn't already thinking, Glenn. And it is my business. We're sitting at his table for dinner and he leaves without explanation? It's unacceptable for him to disrespect Jenna like this.”

”Tara, just stop,” I begged.

”You don't deserve this, Jenna. You don't.” She took a deep breath and threw her napkin on the table. ”I'm sick of him embarra.s.sing you with his selfish c.r.a.p.”

”Oh, she's not embarra.s.sed,” Sarah chided. ”She knows this is the way it is. He works too much. If she wants these fancy dinners and fancy cars and things, someone has to pay for them, don't they?”

”Oh my G.o.d, Sarah! Shut up!” Tara barked.

Sarah gasped and lowered her head. Yeah, it was getting real at the Grainger table. I knew it was coming, I just freaking knew it.

Tara stood and pointed at Glenn. ”That was an insult, a.s.shole. Now you can tell me not to be mean to your mommy!”

I stood and held my hand out to her. ”Tara, calm down.”

Unshed tears finally broke free and traveled angrily down her cheeks. ”I'm sorry, Jenna. I told you this would be a bad idea. I am so sorry I ruined your evening. I should've known better than to think I could be in the same room as the two of them and expect us all to get along.”

She gave me an apologetic smile, teary and sad, before turning to Jason. ”Dr. Hutchens, it was really nice meeting you. I'm sorry for... everything.”

Jason rose from his chair and walked over to stand in front of her. He lifted her hand and pressed a soft kiss on her knuckles.

”It was my pleasure, Tara. These things happen in families. Believe me, you have nothing to apologize for.”

Tara's breath hitched, and a legitimate smile swept over her features. She turned to the girls and nodded at Jason. ”That, girls, is what a gentleman looks like.”

I walked her to the door and told her I would keep Lily overnight. She and Benji had long since gone to his bedroom to play, and I was eager for the distraction. Lily was all suns.h.i.+ne and flowers and sing-songs. The house needed her to s.h.i.+eld it from the ugliness.

After more apologies from her, I kissed her goodbye and went back inside to face the others. When I got to the table, the girls had already started clearing the table and cleaning up the kitchen. I was so grateful and so disappointed that they had to deal with the c.r.a.p Royal was putting them through.

”Jason, I don't know what to say. I'd say this is out of the ordinary, but... this is our life.” I let out a humorless laugh and shook my head. ”I thought we could be normal for the night, but apparently, we can't.”

He smiled. ”Jenna, I enjoyed myself regardless of the activities...” he laughed under his breath and pulled me into a hug.

”Thank you, Jason.”

”I'm going to head out,” he said, looking over at Abbie. ”Abbie and I are going to grab a cup of coffee and get to know each other before I drop her home.” At least that was a relief. Abbie walked up beside him with her coat in hand. She had a troubled look on her face, and I couldn't have felt more awful.

”I'm so sorry, Abbie.”

She shrugged and then hugged me. ”Call me tomorrow. I love you, Jenna.”

I sucked in a hard breath and hugged her tight. ”Have fun. Enjoy the company. He's wonderful.”

She pulled back and winked. ”You did good. Now, go have yourself a shot, take a long hot bath and relax. It'll be okay.”

”Oh shoot,” I cursed. ”I still need to get Sarah and Glenn home and Royal took my truck! I don't have a lift for Glenn. d.a.m.n him!”

It just kept getting worse and worse. I was ready to rip my hair out of my head by the roots! I wanted to get rid of Sarah posthaste. If I didn't, I would end up smacking her.

”I can take them if you'd like, Jenna. My car is low enough that I should be able to get him in.”

I smiled gratefully at him. ”Thank you, Jason. I would appreciate it. I'm not sure when Royal will be back, so that's very helpful.”