Part 30 (1/2)

Bob threw himself back in the chair, and exploded with laughter. Herbert did likewise. But Tom was mad. He thought Bob had played a trick on him, and he said:

”I don't intend to be imposed upon in any such way as what this is, Bob Hunter. I'll show you that I can put up jobs, too, ef you think it is so much fun.”

Now Brie cheese is somewhat soft, so much so that it many times adheres slightly to whatever it touches. Tom had rashly taken it up in his fingers, and now, while breathing forth malice and threats against Bob, he chanced to put his fingers up to his mouth. This brought them again in close proximity to his nose.

”Gewhopper!” yelled Tom, as he thrust his hand into his trousers pocket with a view to better protecting his nose. ”I wouldn't er thought this of you, Bob Hunter!”

Both Bob and Herbert were convulsed with laughter, and were holding their sides from pain.

From the fact that they laughed so uncontrollably, and that they did not deny his charge, Tom felt sure that he had been made the b.u.t.t of a foul joke, and he resented it s.p.u.n.kily. This of course only made the situation more ridiculous, and the more Tom said, the harder Bob and Herbert laughed. At length, however, Bob quieted down sufficiently to remark:

”Tom, listen to me. You're the biggest fool I ever see.”

”Yes, you think you've made a fool of me, don't you, Bob Hunter? But you hain't, for I got on to your game before I got any er that durned stuff into my mouth.”

”Oh, don't you be so ignorant, Tom Flannery. The trouble is with you, you're a chump, you don't know nothin' about livin' at high toned places like this is.”

”No, nor I don't want to nuther, Bob Hunter. Ef that stuff is what you call high toned livin', why I don't want no more of it in mine.

I'll----”

In the excitement of the conversation, Tom forgot to keep his hand housed up longer in his pocket, and now the tips of his fingers unconsciously found their way close to his nose again.

This was what caused Tom to break off his sentence so abruptly. He didn't say anything for a minute, but he looked a whole volume of epithets.

Herbert and Bob started in on another round of laughter that still further irritated Tom.

”I'm goin',” said he, slinging his napkin savagely upon the table; ”I won't stand this business no more, Bob Hunter.”

”Sit down, Tom,” commanded Bob; ”there's more to come yet. You hain't had no coffee yet, nor nuts and raisins.”

Tom immediately replaced the napkin in his lap, and pulled up to the table again. Coffee, nuts and raisins! Oh, no, Tom Flannery couldn't allow his grievance to deprive him of these luxuries!

”Now, Tom,” said Bob, ”I jest want to show you that you've made a fool of yourself, and that we hain't made no fool of you. Of course we couldn't help laughin' to see you actin' so red.i.c.kerlous, Tom, and all about a little piece of cheese, too. A feller would er thought, Tom, that you'd been dumped in a sewer, to see you carry on; but when you get one er them crazy notions in your head, why, there's no doin' anything with you, but to let you sail in and enjoy yourself.”

Bob then ate his choice bit of Brie with a keen relish, much to the surprise of Tom, and I may say Herbert as well, for the latter's taste had not been educated up to the point where he could eat such food.

At length reconciliation was reached, and Tom was once more happy. When the coffee had been drunk, the three boys, while eating nuts and raisins, discussed the problem of money making.

”How about the Wall Street racket?” remarked Tom.

”You refer to speculating, I suppose?” replied Herbert.

”Yes. You see my capital ain't earnin' me nothin'.”

”Well, I have had very little time to think about that since we first spoke of it. In fact, I am not in favor of the idea.”

”What! not in favor of spekerlatin'?” said Bob, with astonishment.

”Nuther am I,” put in Tom, wisely; ”I don't think it's safe.”

”But you think it's safe to bet on horse racin', don't you, Tom Flannery?”