Part 11 (2/2)

I do not think that I can say more, except that I trust you will not refuse my offer.”

There was a delicacy and kindness in this proposal on the part of Lady M--which I felt gratefully; but it appeared to me that after all it was only an excuse to offer me an asylum without any remuneration on my part, and I stated my feeling on that point.

”Do not think so,” replied Lady M--. ”I avoided saying so, because I would not have you styled a music-mistress; but on that one point alone you will more than earn your salary, as I will prove to you by showing you the annual payments to professors for lessons; but you will be of great value to me in other points, I have no doubt. May I, therefore, consider it as an _affaire arrangee_?” After a little more conversation, I acquiesced, and having agreed that I would come as soon as Lady R--went to the continent, or at all events in three weeks, when Lady M--quitted London, I took my leave, and was conveyed back to Lady R--, in the carriage which had been sent for me.

On my return, I found Lady R--seated where I had left her.

”Well,” said she, ”so you have had your audience; and I have no doubt but that you were most graciously received. Oh! I know the woman; and I have been reflecting upon it during your absence, and I have discovered what she wants you for; but this she has not mentioned, not even hinted at. She knows better; but when once in her house, you will submit to it, rather than be again in search of a home.”

”I really do not know what you mean, Lady R--,” said I.

”Has not Lady M--asked you to come as a visitor, without specifying any particular employment?”

”No, she has not. She has proposed my staying in the house to give lessons to her daughters in music, and to be their companion; but there is nothing stated as to a fixed residence with her.”

”Well, Valerie, I know that I am odd; but you will soon find out whether you have gained by the change.”

”Lady R--, I really do not consider you should be so sarcastic or unkind towards me. I do not like to go to France with you for reasons which I have fully explained, at the expense of disclosing family affairs, which I had much rather not have mentioned. You leave me by myself, and I must seek protection somewhere. It is kindly offered by Lady M--, and in my unfortunate position I have not to choose. Be just and be generous.”

”Well, well, I will,” said Lady R--, the tears starting in her eyes; ”but you do not know how much I am annoyed at your leaving me. I had hoped, with all my faults, that I had created in you a feeling of attachment to me--G.o.d knows, that I _have tried_. If you knew all my history, Valerie, you would not be surprised at my being strange. That occurred when I was of your age which would have driven some people to despair or suicide. As it is, it has alienated me from all my relations, not that I have many. My brother, I never see or hear from, and have not for years. I have refused all his invitations to go down to see him, and he is now offended with me; but there are causes for it, and years cannot wipe away the memory of what did occur.”

”I a.s.sure you, Lady R--, I have been very sensible of your kindness to me,” replied I, ”and shall always remember it with grat.i.tude; and if you think I have no regard for you, you are mistaken; but the subject has become painful--pray let us say no more.”

”Well, Valerie, be it so; perhaps it is the wisest plan--”

To change the conversation, I said--”Is not your brother the present baronet?”

”Yes,” replied Lady R--

”And where does he reside?”

”In Ess.e.x, at Culverwood Hall, the seat of all my misfortunes.”

I started a little at the mention of the place, as it was the one which the reader may remember was spoken of by Lionel. I then turned the conversation to other matters, and by dinner-time Lady R--had recovered herself, and was as amiable as ever.

From that day until Lady R--set off for Paris, there was not a word said relative to Lady M--. She was kind and polite, but not so warm and friendly as she had been before, and in her subdued bearing towards me was more agreeable. Her time was now employed in making preparations for her tour. Lionel was the only one who was to accompany her except her own maid. At last she fixed the day of her departure, and I wrote to Lady M--, who returned an answer that it suited her exactly, as she would go to the country the day after. The evening before Lady R--was to start was pa.s.sed very gloomily.

I felt great sorrow at our separation, more than I could have imagined; but when you have been a.s.sociated with a person who is good-tempered and kind, you soon feel more for them than you would suppose until you are about to quit them.

Lady R--was very much dispirited, and said to me, ”Valerie, I have a presentiment that we never shall meet again, and yet I am anything but superst.i.tious. I can truly say that you are the only person to whom I have felt real attachment since my youth, and I feel more than I can describe. Something whispers to me, 'Do not go to France,' and yet something impels me to go. Valerie, if I do come back I trust that you will consider my house your home, if at any time you cannot place yourself more to your satisfaction; I will not say more, as I know that I am not exactly a lovable person, and my ways are odd; but do pray look upon me as your sincere friend, who will always be ready to serve you.

I have to thank you for a few happy months, and that is saying much.

G.o.d bless you, my dear Valerie.”

I was moved to tears by what Lady R--said, and I thanked her with a faltering voice.

”Come now,” said she, ”I shall be off too early in the morning to see you: let us take our farewell.”

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