Part 22 (1/2)

”Thou hast produced so many witnesses and so many proofs,” said Don Quixote, ”that I cannot but say thou mayst probably be speaking truth; but, for Heaven's sake, shorten thy story, or it will last these two days.”

”He shall shorten nothing,” quoth the d.u.c.h.ess; ”and to please me, he shall tell it his own way, although he were not to finish these six days; and, should it last so long, they would be to me days of delight.”

”I must tell you, then,” proceeded Sancho, ”that this same gentleman--whom I know as well as I do my right hand from my left, for it is not a bow-shot from my house to his--invited a husbandman to dine with him,--a poor man, but mainly honest.”

”On, friend,” said the chaplain, ”for, at the rate you proceed, your tale will not reach its end till you reach the other world.”

”I shall stop,” replied Sancho, ”before I get half-way thither, if it please Heaven! This same farmer coming to the house of the gentleman his inviter--G.o.d rest his soul, for he is dead and gone; and, moreover, died like an angel, as it is said,--for I was not by myself, being at that time gone a reaping to Tembleque.”

”Prithee, son,” said the ecclesiastic, ”come back quickly from Tembleque, and stay not to bury the gentleman, unless you are determined upon more burials. Pray make an end of your tale.”

”The business, then,” quoth Sancho, ”was this, that, they being ready to sit down to table,--methinks I see them plainer than ever.”

The duke and d.u.c.h.ess were highly diverted at the impatience of the good ecclesiastic, and at the length and pauses of Sancho's tale; but Don Quixote was almost suffocated with rage and vexation.

”I say, then,” quoth Sancho, ”that, as they were both standing before the dinner-table, just ready to sit down, the farmer insisted that the gentleman should take the upper end of the table, and the gentleman as positively pressed the farmer to take it, saying he ought to be master in his own house. But the countryman, piquing himself upon his good breeding, still refused to comply, till the gentleman, losing all patience, laid both his hands upon the farmer's shoulders, and made him sit down by main force, saying, 'Sit thee down, clod-pole! for in whatever place I am seated, that is the upper end to thee.' That is my tale, and truly I think it comes in here pretty much to the purpose.”

All things are not alike, nor are men always in a humor for all things.

Leave fear to the cowardly.

A stout heart quails misfortune.

Letters written in blood cannot be disputed.

If you seek advice about your own concerns, one will say it is white and another will swear it is black.

Nothing is so reasonable and cheap as good manners.

He is safe who has good cards to play.

Avarice bursts the bag, and the covetous governor doeth ungoverned justice.

The law's measure Is the king's pleasure.

The game is as often lost by a card too many as one too few; but a word to the wise is sufficient.

Come, death, with gently-stealing pace, And take me unperceived away, Nor let me see thy wished-for face, Lest joy my fleeting life should stay.

The tyrant fair whose beauty sent The throbbing mischief to my heart, The more my anguish to augment, Forbids me to reveal the smart.

When a thing is once begun, it is almost half finished.

When the heifer you receive, Have a halter in your sleeve.

Delay breeds danger.

Who sits in the saddle must get up first.