163 Mental Preparation (1/2)

The news of Luna's hospitalization was soon spread to the others as Mura stopped by our clubroom and notified the others. However, it would appear that her secret was still unknown to them all as the reason behind it her hospitalization, is for a simple appendix removal surgery that requires her to be an inpatient at the hospital. Upon hearing of this false news, the others let out a sigh of relief as an appendix removal was obviously a relatively safe surgery. However, unlike them who were unexposed to the reality, I was unable to smile.

When I returned home, my heart would not settle as it continued to beat at a rapid pace. It was as if I was extremely anxious about something and yet nothing can possibly be done to alleviate it. I wanted to contact her, but for some reason, my calls would be transferred to her voicemail. Even if I wanted to go to the hospital and visit her, it was already past the visiting hours. Therefore, there's nothing that I can do to alleviate this awful feeling within my heart.

I sat down on the living room couch, head hanging low as I suffered. It's just that... every time that I saw her she was just in such good of a physical condition that I am not ready for this at all. However, I should be prepared for this all for am I not the only one that had seen her while without the aid of her medications? I should know first hand that her healthy state was simply an illusion put on by the illusionist that was supposed to be based on facts. Why? Why is it that science did not produce anything meaningful and instead decided to focus on erecting a wall of illusion to trick and conceal?

That thought frustrated me. It made things even harder for me to bear with, causing my rapid heartbeat to beat at an even more rapid pace. With a heavy feeling in my heart, I ran both my hands through my hair on either side of my head as I buried my head in my own arms, unable to cope with this strange and alien feeling that I was never exposed to before. My father's death had come as a surprise, so sudden that the pain didn't seem to ever have the time to register. But as for Luna...it wasn't sudden at all. It's like a smooth slide, slowly showing me the view as I descended it, allowing it all to soak in.

The sound of the front door opening followed by the footsteps of Loriana's heels led to me excitedly looking up from my depressed state on the couch and over at the entrance. Seeing her calm and collected countenance was reassuring for me. It was as if I had seen a beacon of light in the dark, an oasis in the desert.

I got up from the couch and slowly walked over to her before collapsing on her slender yet strong frame. Slowly, I wrapped my arms around her slender waist and buried face into her hair while resting my chin on her shoulder, taking in the comforting scent of her body like before.

”What's wrong?” she asked as she gently stroked my head with one hand and patted me on the back with the other.

”May I sleep with you tonight?” My voice was weak and desolate, followed with a few hints of tremor as I was frightened by this awful and alien feeling that I seem to have no way of shaking myself of. The only source of comfort I had in this world is Loriana, and it was only by her side and when she stroked my hair that I am able to enjoy this sense of security and serenity.

That night, after a simple shower, I entered Loriana's bedroom and walked over to her large bed. She was still showering in the bathing room in her room so I climbed in by myself. The sound of water splashing rhythmlessly against the tiled floor was oddly comforting. In addition, the scent of her room, the cold temperature due to the winter season, as well as the warmth of her bed sheets, it all served to calm and soothe my mind of this unknown anxiety.

She emerged from the open door of her washroom in a white bathrobe. There were still beads of water clinging onto the exposed skin of her neck and upper breasts, and when combined with the hot air that seemed to radiate off her body from the shower as well as her still slightly damp hair, it made her appear even the more alluring.

She then started walking towards her wardrobe. Each step she took, part of her long, slender legs would poke out from the bottom portion of her bathrobes. She then stripped herself of the bathrobe, exposing the lingerie underneath, as her body slowly acclimated to the cooler temperature outside the bathing room and hung it up. Then, she walked around to the other side of the bed and got on.

”Ready to go to sleep?” she asked as she picked up her phone to prepare to shut off the lights in her room.