24 Walk in the Rain (2/2)

”Why is that?” Emilia continued.

”Just because,” I responded, trying to keep my past concealed to keep our scales balanced in terms of intel. However, I don't reckon that it would work on my end since she's divine.

”Your only family right now,” Emilia continued, ”its Loriana, correct?”

”Yeah,” I said. ”At least she's the only one who's willing to take me in. My grandparents on my father's side died already, and he had no siblings except her. As for my mother's side...that's different.”

”Do you want that family bond?” Emilia asked.

”I don't care for it much to be honest. It's the same to me whatever.”

”Why do you say that?”

”I don't know,” I chuckled, mocking my own loneliness as I looked up at the tall buildings that lined the side of the road. ”Probably because I've forgot what that feeling is since it's been so long since my family has been whole...but it's probably fractured before that.” I remembered the mother's affair. ”Probably way before that...” I muttered.

”So you do not seek a familial bond?”

”Like I said,” I repeated, ”I forgot what that feeling is like. Loriana has to work quite often to sustain herself and I, and since I am like a burden to her, I can't bring myself to ask more from her.”

I glanced over at Emilia, and realized that she was staring at me and waiting for me to continue.

”It's because of me she can't enjoy a normal life that she's supposed to enjoy,” I continued. ”If it wasn't for me, she would've probably married already. If it wasn't for me, her life would've been so much better. Yet she still does not blame me for anything...I'll be forever in debt to her. It's a debt that I can never pay off, and yet 'that' happened last night...”

”Why do you think it happened?”

”I don't know,” I sighed. ”I just...” I paused and glanced over at Emilia, knowing that she has a history with Ralus and was careful to not offend her. ”I just heard Ralus's voice in my head, and it was like I lost control of my body. Like my primitive instincts just took over and blocked out all of my rationality.”

”So it is Ralus...” Emilia frowned as she gazed at the ground before her.

”Was there something between the two of you?” I asked, staring at the side of her face and trying to glimpse into her eyes.

”Yeah,” she nodded. ”Since you told me so much, I'll tell you a bit as well.” She inhaled and exhaled deeply. ”We...we used to be quite close, attracted to each other as someone of the opposite gender.”

So they were dating...

”And...sometime ago he seemed to have changed into an entirely different person,” she said. ”It was a slow change, and none of us in Heaven knew about it. It was all so gradual that I did not realize until something was truly wrong with him...Lucifer he—”

”Lucifer?” I asked.

”That's...nothing.” Emilia adverted my glance and looked in the direction of the road. ”Well...Ralus...he...became quite different. He was still kind and gentle towards me while we walked the Gardens of Eden, but...he appeared to have developed a sort of disdain for Heaven, especially towards God.”

She appeared obviously saddened by this recounting of the change that Ralus had underwent.

”No longer did he design tests based off of virtue,” Emilia said. ”Instead, he would base all his trials around desires...the very sins that we were taught since young to avoid.”

Taught? Do they have a school in Heaven or something? If so, then who teaches? Don't tell me it's that God.

”And you know the rest,” Emilia concluded and turned to gaze back into my eyes once again. ”Luci—Ralus,” she immediately changed what she was about to say and corrected her slip up. ”He seems quite interested in you. It would be best if you be careful around him.”

”I know,” I nodded as I stared down at the road ahead.

We then walked in silence after having shared a brief conversation with each other. I don't really understand why but I had told her more than I had ever told anyone else about my family. Maybe it was because she's an angel, but there's something else in this new relationship that I am building with her. Maybe it's the fact that we are borderline strangers to each other and certain things one can only tell a stranger.

I stared at the road ahead, watching as Mura and Muria chatted under the umbrella. They walked close together, which made me quite jealous in fact. When can I have someone that can walk by my side that I can be myself with?