7 Mercenary (1/2)
Phase 03: Mercenary
=RK=
Republic cruiser Negotiator
Hyperspace
I should work on my presentation. I almost gave Obi-Wan a hear attack. Perhaps the next time... But I digress. The Jedi sitting across the table from me, had a shocked expression on his face and a faraway look in his eyes. It was obvious he was thinking about all the little things that should have rang a warning bell in his head as far as the interaction between those two were concerned.
I decided that it was best to play ignorant. The outraged part about practically stealing children from their families needed no acting from me; by the Force even the Sith did not had it institutionalized as an official policy to basically kidnap children for training! And to think that the bloody Republic just accepted that... Granted, in a lot of cases the parents were glad that their kiddies were to become Jedi... In others, well not so much. Officially, only children willingly given by the their parents were taken into the Order. Unofficially, a mind trick or two done by an expect could persuade even the most loving parent that their kid was best with the Jedi… Throw in a few scary stories about what the Dark Side does to people who weren't properly trained...
”I gather that your reaction is based on something more than those two lovebirds putting the wool over your eyes?” I asked feigning innocence.
”That boy!” snapped Kenobi. ”He has to stop it at once! He could be expelled for this!”
I raised an inquiring eyebrow at this particular outburst.
”Isn't that a bit harsh you know? Boys being boys and girls being girls... It's not like it's the first nor the last time something like that has happened. How do you think most of the Force Sensitive come to be? Usually the Force is not going around blessing random couples for the hell of it...”
Well I knew for a fact that it wasn't actually genetic but either being carried to term from Force Sensitive mother or if the father was powerful enough in the Force he could get Force Sensitive children even from a normal mother. Genetics really didn't come into it. One of my aquintances had been researching it extensively in his youth. I carefully never asked how many people died or were left broken during his experiments. He was too useful to risk what little was left of my conscience raising its ugly head.
”It's forbidden! Attachment and passion lead to the Dark side! He is too full of anger already and does not need further distraction! You saw Anakin when Grievous captured Padme on the Malevolence! If he had not suppressed his feelings...”
I snorted in disbelief. Ah, the powers of self-delusion! I wonder how the Jedi survived the last millennium like that.
”I call bantha poodoo on that! I came from an era when seducing Jedi to our side was a national sport! Let me tell you, there was not one of them who fell to the Dark Side because of love! Those who had someone to be in love with were the hardest to turn! And some of these people came back to your precious light precisely because of that love! So don't give me that nonsense you've been spoon fed in the Temple. You can think for yourself!”
Kenobi glared at me.
”How can you say that!? Now that my eyes are opened for Anakin's indiscretion...” I chuckled at his words, ”I shudder to think what he would have done if Padme was wounded or if the worst happened!”
”And what is the worst, Kenobi? That the Senator could have gotten herself killed and thus removing a temptation for your precious chosen one? Or that he might have sought vengeance? You Jedi are deluding yourselves! You are not automatons without feelings! Dismissing them only makes you weaker! Why do you think that we were so successful in turning Jedi left and right during every major conflict? Because there were always some of you who wanted to cut off your feelings and that makes your kind such easy prey! What do you think happens when one of you Jedi is confronted with what he's been so busily ignoring for his whole life?!”
I could see the gears turning in Obi-Wan's head despite his persistent glaring.
”That's not what I mean and you know it! I don't wish anything bad to happen to Senator Amidala! If we do not discard our emotions we become vulnerable! They cloud our judgment! How could we fulfill our role as guardians of the Republic's peace if we let ourselves be swayed by our feelings?” Obi-Wan spoke passionately.
”Kenobi, despite the short time I've known you I am well aware that you are not that thick. Stop recycling those slogans and think for yourself! How could you guard the people of this galaxy if you could not understand them? Have you ever wondered how the average citizen sees your Order and its members? I'll tell you how! You are like a scary space wizards who prompt fear and distrust. You can't cut off a vital part of what makes you a living, breathing sapient being and call it an achievement!”
”It's worked for a thousand years! The Code is the foundation of what means to be a Jedi!”
See, there?! He did not argue that many people see the Jedi in a less than a flattering light!
”Only because these new Sith were not interesting in a bunch of new recruits and decided to stay low! Your Code was not given to the Jedi by the Force itself!”
Obi-Wan looked to be deep in thought.
”No it wasn't. Yet it served us for the longest recorded period of peace!”
”A time when there was no one obvious to challenge you! And now you are playing in the hands of a Sith Lord. There are always emotions no matter if you try to discard them or not! It's one thing to achieve an inner equilibrium and not let your emotions rule you! There are other feelings that fear, hatred and rage. You know that, right?” I asked rhetorically.
”I know that!” he whispered through clenched teeth. ”It's not about whether we can or not let ourselves be somewhat influenced by our emotions when not on mission! It's about the temptation! How do you cut yourself from your feelings when it counts if you do not do it all the time?!”
”You don't. You simply train yourself to be in charge of your emotions so they do not control you.” I said more calmly. ”And that is not a Sith idea. We had to know our enemies in order to fight them effectively. What you are doing in today's galaxy has very little in common with the Jedi of old. Find a balance that works for you while you keep your feelings. You won't fall to the Dark side by doing that. On the contrary, you'll be not only stronger for it but it will be easier to resist temptation that way.”
For a long time Kenobi was silent. When he choose to speak again a wry smile appeared on his face.
”Is this the way you turn Jedi from the Order? With logic instead of threats and torture?”
”Look at me and tell me, Obi-Wan, when do you think that I fell to the Dark side? ”
He gave me a dirty look.
”How in the name of the Force should I know?!”
I allow a smirk to form on my lips.
”I'll tell you a deep, 'dark' secret, Kenobi.” Sarcasm was dripping from my words. ”As the Jedi of my time saw it, I never fell.”
Obi-Wan gave me an incredulous and disbelieving look. It seemed to say 'Yeah, pull the other one'.