Chapter 56: Little White Rabbi (2/2)

Lin Yixin never took a single glance at Du Thirteen or Gui Guzi from the very start, as if they didn’t exist.

Once we were upstairs, we sat at a table near the window. I took the menu and smiled at the waitress. “I want this… 75 yuan Dongting Duck and this… 112 yuan Tasty Snake and also this, and this… then the cheaper 80 yuan Special Steamed Fish Head In Chili Sauce…”

“Wah~”

Lin Yixin’s beautiful eyes went wide. Her eyes locked onto me sternly as if her heart was about to burst. Her expression was beautiful but was also destructive, as if she wished to immediately pierce me with a thousand arrows.

Sun Qingqing smiled. “Hey handsome, you look like you haven’t had a full meal in ages…”

I nodded. “Yeah, sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t. Being a pro player is a life of sacrifices!”

Lin Yixin bit her red lips and glared at me. “Hmph. Just wait until you have to treat me next. Stupid Lu Chen, you Little Cheat!”

I clapped my hands and laughed out loud. Lin Yixin being in a bad mood made me happy.

Sun Qingqing looked at me, then at Lin Yixin, and seemed to realize something. She stuck out her tongue. “Lu Chen, don’t make Yiyi angry. Let me tell you, in my whole two years of being classmates with Yiyi, I’ve never seen her treat a guy before. You’re the first, so you should feel proud!”

“Really?” I shot a glance at Lin Yixin. She was still looking at me with a murderous look. I then said, “Miss, can you also get us a big bottle of fruit juice, the 68 yuan kind…”

“Ah…”

Lin Yixin was near collapse. She looked pitifully at Sun Qingqing and said, “Qingqing, you still have a ton of instant noodles, right?”

“Yeah!”

“Don’t throw them away, I’ll be eating those next week...”

“...”

Sun Qingqing was speechless. She then tried to smooth things over. “Let’s just talk about what’s happening in the game. Yiyi wants to establish a new guild and you have the Bloody Mercenaries workshop, Lu Chen. We’ve both offended the Domination Clan so we should team up in the future or else the Domination Clan will make our lives difficult.”

I nodded. “This needs to be considered at length. We need an invulnerable strategy to thoroughly defeat Gods of Destruction!”

Lin Yixin raised a brow and smiled provokingly. “Are you saying that your IQ is high?”

“Yeah, you want to say something?” I drank my tea, extremely confident.

Lin Yixin’s smile was especially sweet. “Let me ask you a few simple questions!”

“Go on!”

“How many younger brothers does Aladdin have?”

“Uh…”

I was confused. “Aladdin is an Indian, how would I know…”

“Idiot! Twenty-five! Aladdin, Baladdin, Caladdin, etc!”

“Fuck! This question’s too misleading…”

Lin Yixin covered her smile. “Again, again. Second question: What were Shennong’s last words before he died?”

Me: “...”

Lin Yixin smiled even deeper. She pinched a chopstick and pretended to have trouble breathing. “Th-this plant, is… is poisonous…”

Me: “Fuck!”

Lin Yixin continued with a smile, “Next, third question: Zhao Yun was incredibly valiant at Changban Slope, killing left and right. Li Dian said, ‘Sir, that white-robed little general’s coming over again!’ Xiahou Dun said, ‘This is already the seventh time, isn’t he tired?’ Cao Cao replied, ‘Bastard, is he only going to give up after killing all my men?’ What did Zhao Yun say?”

Me: “...”

Lin Yixin was so happy that her beautiful eyes were nearly closed as she smiled. “Zhao Yun said, ‘That bastard Zhang Fei told me to bring up the rear but his loud voice broke Dangyang Bridge. How am I supposed to go back?’”

I was dumbstruck. Lin Yixin was well-read. Amazing.

“How’s that? What’s your IQ now?” Lin Yixin looked at me with a smile.

Me: “...”

Sun Qingqing shook as she laughed and leaned on the table, gasping to breathe. Lin Yixin and I looked at each other, the atmosphere filled with dense killing intent.

The dishes came not long after.

Du Thirteen and Gui Guzi were sitting not too far away. Seizing this opportunity, Du Thirteen came over and sat next to me with a wine cup in hand. He was pretty skilled at hitting on girls. He looked at the campus view outside the window and said to me with a smile, “Lu Chen, remember when we were still uni students? Those were some happy times!”

I nodded.

Thirteen continued, “I still remember us secretly buying a hot pot back in our senior year. Heh, just when we were worrying about what ingredients to put in, a little white rabbit came hopping over from the student dorm lawns. Aye, it was so fresh and tender, so delicious…”

Thirteen vulgarly smacked his lips.

Sun Qingqing’s expression changed. She then turned to Lin Yixin. “Yiyi, that little white rabbit you were raising in freshman year… the truth’s finally been revealed…”

1. Popular internet meme used when trying to avoid responsibility. Originating from a drunk driver who said his dad’s Li Gang (deputy director of local public security bureau) after hitting two university students.

2. Antagonist of a popular children’s show.

3. Shennong, Farmer God in Chinese mythology, died as a result of his researches into the properties of plants by experimenting upon his own body, after, in one of his tests, he ate the yellow flower of a weed that caused his intestines to rupture before he had time to swallow his antidotal tea