50 Why Was It Him? (1/2)

Qiu Yue kept telling herself that everything was alright, that she was fine. And that was what made that day even more painful.

After the concert, Qiu Yue dived back into work like there was no tomorrow and just kept working. She just wanted to keep herself occupied, to stop thinking.

She knew the moment she stopped, she might not be able to hang on anymore. But for some reason there was something bothering her, it almost felt like a stone over her heart and she couldn't help feeling like something was going very wrong.

But she kept pretending that everything was okay. Days kept going by and at one point she felt less alive and more dead.

Xiang Yu Se supported his sister, posting fangirling videos, reacting to her concert videos and music videos, effectively being known as a  sis-con by everyone. Unfortunately as he was actively shooting a movie currently, he couldn't come and see Qiu Yue.

Liang ZiQin did end up joining the agency, but under another manager of course! Sadly, because she had so much work she wasn't able to meet Qiu Yue at all and she really felt cheated by fate.

Qiao Feng should've felt happy seeing Qiu Yue work so hard, but he didn't. He felt very worried and fear started to creep into his heart, though he didn't know why and what he could do to stop it. All he knew was that Qiu Yue was burning herself out, so many times he and Yao Yan had tried to stop her, force her to rest, and yet she'd come back and continue as though her health and well-being didn't matter.

Interestingly even Yao Yan would disappear some times, but before that she'd look at Qiu Yue with a complicated gaze.

”I'm trying to find her something, I'm searching for hope.”

That was all she said to Qiao Feng before disappearing again.

For a month, as Qiu Yue slowly self destructed, Qiao Feng was left in better shape. Obviously he could scream or shout at her, force her to do anything, so he kept watch, pulling her away from the fire when she got too close.

Days passed and it had already been almost a year since Qiu Yue had come to this world. It was almost midnight and Qiu Yue sitting in her private recording room, holding her guitar as she absentmindedly strummed a few strings.

Qiao Feng had to leave for a few hours, he'd looked at her as though to check if she was listening.

”Today is... kind of important so I'll be back in a few hours. Please be here, okay?”

Qiu Yue nodded and gave Qiao Feng an empty smile, which only served to worry him more. Looking at her, who was busy trying to figure out which style suited the song, he thought that nothing should go wrong. At most he'd be gone for an hour, maybe two.

Reassuring himself with words he didn't know if he believed, Qiao Feng quickly left to go visit his parents.

Qiu Yue started at the empty paper on front of her and threw her pen away in frustration. For some reason she felt so restless, like something was wrong. Very wrong.

She shook her head, trying her best to ignore that feeling then decided to throw some water on her face to wake up. In the washroom mirror, a messy face looked back at her. Deep dark circles, chapped lips and messy hair... if she didn't get her act together soon then any appearances she had would  be cancelled. There was no way she could go out in front of the cameras in this condition.

She was about to look away in annoyance when something caught her eye, swinging in front of her chest was the ring she wore around her neck. Her wedding band...

And then almost as if she were Alice, she started to spiral down into the darkness as she finally realized why she'd felt like that. It was today.

December 19.

It was his birthday...

All because she'd been trying so hard to be fine, she'd almost forgotten him. She almost felt like laughing. She could remember, suddenly, telling him that they'd always celebrate it big every year, forever. Instead she'd closed up her memories and shoved them away.

How was it that everything she did was so wrong? Everything?

Smiling to herself, at how utterly wrong she had been, Qiu Yue walked out into the welcoming yet uncharacteristic chilling rain.

At this time of the night, in this cold, there really was no one outside. Qiu Yue sat outside in the pouring rain for some time, yet there were no tears but the thoughts in her head were going haywire.

She should've been sad, she did miss him but all that played in her head were all those times with Huo Zi Feng where she was truly happy. Suddenly she stood up, this environment in the dark with the rain falling was clouding her memories. She felt like taking a ride in the rain.

She hurried to the parking lot for the two wheeler vehicles and let out a relieved smile as she spotted Qiao Feng's bike. She had his extra key with herself, he always kept one in his office in case someone needed it and it happened that today he'd taken the car.