152 Chocolate covered heartache (2/2)
Jos's hand shot to her shoulder. ”It will be ok. I'll get a bandage after I eat.”
He moved toward the pantry quickly, ”Here, I can get the first aid kit. I'll help you.”
”NO!” Jos's words shocked even herself. Her eyes traveled nervously between Shelly and Arei. ”I can get it later, it's fine. The food's getting cold.” She grabbed the milk and headed back to the table, forcing an end to the awkward conversation.
Arei frowned as he walked back to the table with two glasses and a bowl. ”He did that to you didn't he?” Arei asked.
”It's not what you think. You wouldn't understand.” Jos whispered as she pushed her food around her plate with her fork, her appetited suddenly vanishing.
Arei nodded. ”You're right, I don't understand.” He set his fork down, turning his full attention to her. ”I don't understand how every time you are around that kid, he either hurts you physically or emotionally or both, but you still worship the ground he walks on.” Arei bit out. ”It doesn't make a bit of sense to me.”
Jos turned her head away, hiding the tears that began to fall. She pushed her chair back and shot up. She ran back to her room without another word.
”Shit…” Arei sighed. ”Well that didn't go well, did it.” He asked the wolf that was staring awkwardly between him and Jos's departing back. Arei quickly poured milk in the bowl and set it down. ”Should... should I go after her or let her cool down?” He asked running his hand through his hair, his focus on the hallway. Shelly nudged his leg and nodded toward the hall. He let out a heavy sigh, ”Alright...” He glanced back down at her nervously. ”But what do I say?” The wolf shrugged as if to say, 'figure it out'. He frowned. ”Well that's not helpful.” The wolf nudged him again. ”Alright, alright... I'm going.”
Arei rapped lightly on the heavy oak door, before pushing it open. ”Hey, is it alright if I come in?” He didn't wait for an answer as her soft sobs filled the air. Pushing the door open, he found her curled into a ball on the bed. He walked slowly over and set down on the edge. ”I'm sorry, I was out of line saying that. I realize I'm causing you just as much pain questioning your judgement as he is by... whatever it is he's doing that I don't seem to be understanding.” Arei bit back the irritation that his words were causing. ”I'm here for you in whatever way you need me. Just... just help me understand, alright?” tear filled eyes met his as she looked up from the pillow she was holding.
Tears ran down Jos's cheeks as she blurted out, ”That's the problem, I don't know what I want you to be!” Her eyes widened with shock from her own words before she buried her face back into the pillow, a new wave of sobs emerging.
Jos nodded and wiped at her eyes as she sat up. She pulled the pillow tightly against her chest as she met his gaze. ”I don't know what to tell you. I love Russ and as much as I enjoy having you back in my life... you being here, like this, is equally as painful and confusing especially with all the things you've said.”
Arei nodded in understanding. ”I've never once tried to hide my feelings for you even when I hid nearly everything else.”
She tilted her head. ”But did you? Arei, you must understand, even if Russ wasn't in this equation, I would have a hard time trusting you now. I can rack back through my memories and decipher the fragments of time we spent together... half of which were one hundred percent lies. What would have happened had Ry not walked in that night? Would you have told me the whole truth? How long would you have waited?” She let out an irritated sigh as he continued to stare at her dumbfounded. ”You keep questioning me about my decisions to stay with Russ when it was you who hurt me the worst.”
Arei couldn't force words past his tight throat, instead, he pulled her tightly against his chest. He buried his face in her hair as he held her tightly against him until she stopped trying to push away. He felt her hands stop pushing against him and instead snake around his waist. Her tears left hot wet spots in the fabric of his shirt causing it to cling tighter to his chest. He racked his brain for a response, for any possible thing to sooth such hurt but there was nothing. He squeezed his eyes tightly shut as pressure built in them. He'd came in here to calm her down, instead, he'd only upset her more. He'd forced her to confess something that would weigh heavily on both of them from here on out, no doubt. He was about to pull her away and pour his heart out when her cell phone on the nightstand lit up and began to play a romantic melody. His body felt cold and empty as Jos quickly pulled away and answered the phone. Her voice was hoarse from crying but there was a soft, happy undertone as she began to speak.