118 Stares (2/2)

”Ah, right. I fed her the pancake and I don't really remember the topic of the conversation. I think it was you but I think it was someone else too,” Ryder muttered, ”then for some reason, she almost choked on a piece of, and as I was trying to help her with the choking, she just started to shake and tremble. Then she started to scream like her head was being split into two, she seemed to be crying and begging through her scream. She seemed horrified.”

He looked at Vixen. ”She was horrified.”

”Then I tried to get her to step out of it but she didn't seem to want to notice me or rather she couldn't notice me. Her eyes did this weird things where they would be looking straight at me but she wouldn't see me. Like she was trapped somewhere or she was looking at something that was in my position but wasn't me,” Ryder explained, getting confused at his own words as he said them.

Vixen simply nodded to show that he was following along. 'Hallucinations.'

”Then she started begging to the saved, begging to be given the chance to live. Begging to be forgiven,” Ryder continued. ”Then she'd start screaming, shaking in the eyes of the person who was in front of her. She'd push me away when I tried to help her and then shriek 'NO… don't do this,' Almost like she was being chased.”

”Then she started to hyperventilate, breathing heavily, and soon foam formed in her mouth. I was so confused and worried about what happened to her but I was also paralyzed. I didn't know what to do, my body wasn't able to move and I just sat there, frozen like a fool,” Ryder chuckled weakly, his fingers clenching into a fist. His eyes narrowed as he despised the way he reacted to her. ”Why would I do that? At the moment she needed me the most, I wasn't even able to do the last I would do for her.

”Was that your first time facing something like that?” Vixen asked.

”Y-yea…” Ryder muttered.

”Then there you go, the answer to your question,” Vixen shrugged. His eyes were focused on Ryder. ”So what happened next?”

”It sounded like something was being forced down her throat or like she was being choked. She looked up at me… through me and whispered, begging for help,” Ryder shivered as he remembered the moment. ”That was when I snapped out of it and began to run for help.”

”Why didn't you stay? Fix it yourself?” Vixen asked.

”I was scared. Scared of her and scared of what she would… do to me and I was also scared of what I'd do. I didn't want to make the situation any worse since I was so illy prepared for something like this so I went looking for someone who had been here for a while and could get to and through her quicker,” Ryder looked up at Vixen. ”It was you.”

The pieces fit. Vixen understood what happened.

”Then I found you with that girl and dragged you with me to her room. Then you kicked me out and that was all,” Ryder sighed. Now that he was recalling the moments, he felt like an idiot.

He had just sat there, paralyzed while Regan suffered while Vixen ran into the room immediately and scooped her up in his arms when I couldn't even come to her. How arrogant of him to have questioned anything Vixen did. What right did he have to do that? How couldn't even help her when she needed it immediately? He felt pathetic. Hw as pathetic.

”Try better next time,” Vixen muttered.

”Huh?” Ryder flinched, turning to Vixen.

”I hope there will be no other time but if it does, you'll do much better this time. You've been through it once, it's stick to you, keep you thinking about the best ways to help them when it happens,” Vixen smiled.

Ryder looked up at Vixen, examining his face. Despite the fact that he was ridiculously handsome, there was just something about his face… maybe the alignment of his features? His lips? His eyes? There was something about him that seemed surreal to the eye. Like he could be seen but wasn't really there. Just like he was looked at by Regan, Vixen felt the same to him. Mysterious and untouched.

”Is that how it happened to you?” Ryder asked his head cocking to the side.

Vixen chuckled, ”Yea, let's call it that.”

Ryder stared at Vixen for a second, focused on his face for longer than needed. His eyes were staring into Vixen's.

”Ryder? You're zoning out again,” Vixen called out.

Ryer snapped out of his phase and turned away from Vixen immediately, his hands flying over his lips and his cheeks heating up. The thought repeated itself in his mind.

'He's cute…'