Chapter 114 An Honest Discussion (2/2)
Rassa knew what Aegin was talking about. No friends interacted the way they did.
”We're all lost, and somehow, without meaning to, we've found each other,” Ebony spoke.
Rassa couldn't disagree with what they'd said. If that was how they felt, then he was happy they were content. But that didn't change the fact that despite their best efforts, they couldn't really help him. He was alone in the Chaos. He'd been thinking as much for the past month but hadn't wanted to admit it to himself. After all, facing eternity on his own didn't seem all that exciting. It sounded like more routine. More mundaneness.
”Rassa?” asked Aegin in the silence.
Rassa looked up at Aegin, then at Ebony, ”Thankyou, I appreciate your honesty. But the fact of the matter is that I am still dangerous. I will get you killed. But more importantly, I'm not sure I can take our friendship to heart”.
”What do you mean?” asked Aegin.
”Should I not meet an untimely end, I will never die,” Rassa said, ”I will reach full maturity, then age no longer. That is what I face, and I must face it alone. It may seem silly for me to deny this now, but in a few decades, when you're both old and frail and I am still the same as I am today...I don't think I can handle more loss than I already have. You saw what loss has done to me. You've been seeing it ever since we came here. I'm not sure I have the strength for it”.
Ebony and Aegin were silent for a while before Ebony spoke up again.
”In the end, when you are looking back on your eternity, do you truly wish to feel nothing at all?” asked Ebony, ”Do you truly wish to know in yourself that you denied every connection you could for fear of losing it?”
Rassa opened his mouth to deny her, but stopped. That was exactly what he was doing. He was being a coward, ”Putting it that way doesn't change the fact that I will continue to suffer loss”.
”We will one day lose you too,” Ebony replied, ”But we do not fear that. We don't take joy in knowing it either, but we don't fear it. Loss is a part of life. If you do not lose, are you truly living?”
Rassa didn't argue back this time, instead, he stood and moved towards his room, pausing at the door.
”So, what now?”
”What do you mean?” asked Aegin.
”Thought you were bored of the Port, what do you want to do now?”
”What do you want to do?” asked Aegin.
”I've got eternity to find out, better we pay attention to the desires of you mortals first,” Rassa replied, a small smile on his lips before he turned and headed into the bedroom.