Chapter 65 - I ruined everything (2/2)

”Drink, Eshan,” I urged him earnestly. Irrespective of the reason for his anguish, all that my restless heart wanted was him to feel better.

I heaved a relieved sigh on watching him taking a few sips of water. I took back the glass from him, kept it on its original position, and returned to Eshan.

”It was just a movie, Eshan. Why would you get yourself this worked up for some fiction?” I asked, genuinely willing to know what it was that had got him so upset. As I pondered a little, I was almost sure that it wasn't only about the movie. Eshan wasn't that kind of person. There had to be something else that had bothered him to the extent where he couldn't hold back his emotions.

”It wasn't just a movie, Innaya. It was a movie where… in the leads… I saw – us.”

'Us… in the leads?' I was beginning to understand where it was heading, but I chose silence for, I didn't wish to presume anything. I waited for him to continue, for I wanted to hear it from him.

”I don't know why, but I saw us in them. I could just relate to them. They had an arranged marriage, like us. They adored each other like we…” He trailed off, perhaps, unsure of saying it aloud for we still weren't at that stage yet. ”And just when they were at the peak of their affection… one misunderstanding… ended everything. It just got me thinking -”

”That the incident would repeat with us,” I completed the rest of his sentence.

Eshan looked at me, horrified. Deep down, in some corner of his heart, he had the same thing, but hearing it from me just added on the damage. He exhaled before he softly pulled me beside him.

”I am just afraid, Innaya. The mere thought is deadly. What we have… is precious to me, and I can't afford losing it.”

His honest confession moved me, and for several moments, I was at a loss of words. I just did not know what I was supposed to say at that moment. Words, anyway, had never really been in my favor. I do not know what came over me that made me turn to him. I circled my hands around his neck. ”So can't I, Eshan… so can't I,” I mumbled in his embrace.

I knew, his fear wasn't something to be taken so seriously. It was just a movie. 'It was just a movie, Innaya.' I assured and reassured myself.

Eshan and I weren't going to go through the pain of separation. His understanding was beyond the understanding of a normal person. He would never misunderstand me. Even if something happened, he would always be patient enough to wait until everything resolved.

I knew he was a gem of a person. There was no debate about the same in my mind. I would never misunderstand him for, for once, the sun could forget rising, but Eshan would never do something to purposely hurt me in any way, and even if it happened, someday, I would hold on to him, as patiently as he had always done.

I would never go away from him.

He would never go away from me.

What happened to the couple in the movie would never happen to us. We would not let it happen.

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Once I was out of the memory lane, my tears saw no end. Such a pathetic person I had been all along. I had promised that day to myself that no matter what happened, I would hold on to him patiently.

I had failed myself.

I had failed him.

I had failed his love.

How could I do it to him? How could I do it, to us? I ruined everything. I ruined everything.