Chapter 1063 (2/2)

Just as quickly, Randidly twisted himself back into the tempered knife of purpose and allowed himself to be born outward by the wave of instinctual release. It was difficult to get a sense of time, but everything seemed too fast to handle and too slow to escape.

Randidly was growing drowsy. The darkness and liquid moonlight lapped around him, urging him to let go of his tight-fisted purpose and stay here in the dappled light. Disperse his tight will, become a part of the vast flood. Oneness beckoned him.

It would be so easy to release all of the tight tension in Randidly’s body. Immediately, all the hatred and secret fear that lined the Grim Chimera’s core would disperse. When he became a part of the flood of light, nothing would need to bother him anymore. He would have an infinite number of others just like him that had become a part of the Oneness. Accepting that Oneness would mean transcending his individual emotions.

He would be free, the moonlight Nether whispered.

The small kernel of Randidly’s will bobbed up and down as it was born outward in the deep waves of gleaming Nether. Farther and farther, deeper and deeper. The sea seemed to have no end, and Randidly was comparatively so small.

So far and so long Randidly traveled, without reaching the edge of this vast flood. Without being able to touch the core of the Nether Well and attempt to taper off its flow. And he began to wonder whether it was worth it to continue this struggle. It was a thought that he struggled against, but it kept re-emerging to distract him.

As long as he refused to accept the Nether, it burned and devoured him. It was a hungry thing. And out here, completely submerged in the Nether, Randidly was entirely alone.

The Grim Chimera shivered. And that small spike of fear brought with it a burning clarity to Randidly’s mind. The fire in his core exploded outward in emerald brilliance.

This is exactly what I’m afraid of. I’m so terribly afraid of being alone forever.

‘Then join us,’ the Oneness of the Nether around Randidly whispered. ‘We are never alone. We are One. If you become One, your fear will disappear.’

As he was pulled even farther outward, Randidly considered that. It was difficult to think, but somehow he knew that he could not take the decision lightly. The small motes of uncompromised consciousness scoured the problem. Clockwork gears whirred, the most exterior and superfluous slowing down and stopping.

Randidly was drifting while thinking.

‘The Oneness is perfect. The Oneness is complete. The Oneness-’

Is alone, isn’t it? The fire of consciousness flared brighter in Randidly’s chest. The gears of Randidly’s mind began to tick rhythmically. The Grim Chimera clicked its sharp teeth in time with the thoughts to maintain its clarity. You spread and destroy everything you touch. You annihilate all others or absorb them into the Oneness. You… are just as afraid as I am, aren’t you? If you are One… you are alone.

‘We are not afraid!’ The Oneness roared. The quicksilver moonlight stretched and arched into violent blades of light that spiraled dangerously around the kernel of Randidly’s will.

But the Grim Chimera just smiled. If you claim to be alive, you cannot be afraid all the time. Don’t let the fear control you.

‘WE ARE NOT AFRAID!’ The surrounding Nether began to rumble. Like the floodgates opening, Nether at a volume hitherto unheard of smashed into Randidly. It ate and ate, a jealous, spiteful thing filled with fear.

Shaking his head, Randidly reached out and grasped the core of the Nether Well. It was so close that Randidly couldn’t believe he had missed it before. That terrible loneliness felt like home to him. It urged him to join the unending flood of negative emotion into the world, flooding away all the rest of existence in a futile attempt to prove that he was also not afraid of loneliness.

Well, I am afraid. Randidly said quietly. And he pictured Vualla, her face streaked with tears.

Randidly reached out to the edge of the Nether Well and began to pull. It was like a spigot that had gone out of control, and Randidly had the tiresome task of slowly tightening the bolts to reduce the flood of Nether from it. All the while, the sense of Oneness continued to try and tempt him into joining it.

Randidly was alone, true, and lonely for it. But that was okay. He saw again Vualla’s tears. We aren’t the only lonely ones in the world, you know.

If the time to reach the edge seemed confusing, time slowly and gradually controlling the flood of Nether was even more difficult. Because the expulsion of energy was an escalating thing, it should have gotten easier the longer he worked at it. Yet the effort weighed on him like a mountain every short step of the way. It was a wall of Nether constantly wailing for release.

Randidly tightened the spigot.

Randidly tightened.

Randidly didn’t dare stop, lest he never start again.

Randidly tightened.