123 The Schism Between He and Himself (1/2)

Life changed in various, sobering ways after that night. What he had once lost had been given back to him — his mortality, and everything that came along with it.

The overwhelming power he once possessed had truly disappeared. He had made good on his promise to Reed.

His connection to Anima, which once had been deeply profound and unbreakable, was now nothing more than a fleeting whisper in the wind. The privileges he formerly had — afforded to him by the mark of responsibility — no longer applied to him.

Besmirched beyond recognition, Reed quickly learned that he had become a pariah in the eyes of Anima. His mark of shame had turned him into a target of scorn. The tender affection and loyalty it once had for him were gone.

That's… probably wrong, too. …I've most likely never been the one it really loved.

Ah… It makes perfect sense. What a fool I've been, thinking so highly of myself…

Nothing had been stolen; What had been given to him had simply been taken back by its rightful owner. There was nothing evil or unfair about that. It had never belonged to Reed in the first place, after all…

Reed hollowly laughed. I must've looked like a big conceited idiot — a fucking clown to him…

He calmly stared at the fist-sized piece of rubble on his desk.

Silence permeated the bedroom. Not even the sound of his breathing could be heard.

There was nothing that could properly describe what it felt like looking at that… stained piece of rubble. Nothing.

Reed had felt this feeling before… twice. And each time, he had promised himself to never let it happen again. He had sworn to himself that he'd become the man they needed to him to be at the time.

Not a grand hero like in his childhood stories. He did not desire the theatrics, prestige or authority. Those days were over for him.

All he wanted to do was… become someone the people he loved could rely upon. To be the person they could turn to when they needed help.

He wasn't a selfish monster, either. He understood that now, more than ever before there was a need for him — for someone who could defend the innocent and weak against the tyrannical Infestation.

Not a day went by that he did not think about the lives that perished during the Twilight War, be they Chosen or Mortal.

He owed it to them to protect their home, their world.

…By all accounts it was his fight too, as someone who was a part of the multiverse. Whether he liked or not, the reality he lived in was in danger.

It needed someone to protect it, and the people who called it home.

…...What would she think about him right now?

When had he stopped trying to prove his worthiness to her?

Had he not made a promise to her?

As infuriating as it was, he knew that the bastard was right on at least one point.

…But I'm not that strong. I'm not the guy you're looking for. It's too much to handle. …And the only I want to take care of is... my family.

Her.

Was it wrong for him to focus on what mattered to him?

The stained piece of rubble would not give him an answer, no matter how much he queried it.

\”..........................................…\”

Reed put his right hand on top of it and grasped it with all his strength as if he were trying to crush it in his hands. The moment he laid his hands on it, his hand started to burn with a fury unknown to man.

It was as if he'd grasped a molten piece of lava with his bare hands, but he didn't mind. He had gotten used to the insufferable pain already.

After all, it was not the first time he had tried to lift it. He had tried many a time.

White-hot waves of pain traveled up his right arm and assaulted his mind, but he continued to hold on to the piece of rubble nonetheless...

And then, he pulled up.