49 Till we meet again (2/2)

And I'm smacked onto my butt again, ah a long-range weapon really is useful but only when you're on the winning side. Still, I'm getting a lot better with sing staff type weapons sparring with someone closer to my own size. It also helps that Amar is easy to bully into teaching me much slower and easier compared to Tamera.

Doesn't mean the practice is actually easy though.

”Are you still alive?” he pokes me with his stick when I finally stop getting back up.

*huff ”...No.”

”Okay then, do you want to get juice at the cafeteria?”

*huff* ”In a....minute...”

While juice sounds absolutely divine right now, I'm still trying to catch my breath here.

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”Hey Rosalia.”

”?”

I weakly wave my hand to show that I'm listening, just busy breathing.

”They want me to go on another raid soon.”

”What already! Wow that's a good thing isn't it, that means whoever's in charge approves of you.”

”Yeah...I guess.”

It should be a good thing, aren't people constantly trying to get picked on raid team and campaigns to amass all sort of street cred? The possible loot, treasures, and money to be made from success from any beast or dungeon raid were also very very verrrry important. It's not like they pay people in the training camp, well besides the instructors.

But Amar sounds so uncertain about it. Shouldn't he be jumping up and down at the honor and chance? Boys twice and 4 times his age would.

”Are you going to go?”

”...maybe.”

”Hey what's wrong?”

He stays quiet and goes creepily still. All of a sudden the kid feels distant, his presence nearly unnoticeable if he were not sitting right next to me. Institutionally I don't dare look him in the face, especially not in the eye, not right now.

”Hey, whatever it is you can tell me you know. I mean it's only fair since I complain so much about myself....I won't say anything.”

The awkward silence stretches but I leave him that time and space, even if it feels like sitting next to a ghost. Eventually, Amar lets out a breath I haven't realized he was even holding.

”They want me to go because it's close to um, where I'm from. As a local, I'm useful. ”

He says 'useful' with enough hopeful conviction to set me off, on what I don't know yet. It's just....not right.

”Your homeland? Is it far away from here?”

”Very.”

I don't dare ask if he has family waiting for him still, it's too risky, too insensitive.

”Do you want to go back?”

”...No, not really.”

A complicated past is nothing new to the member's troops. Hell, a tragic backstory is almost a requirement for a lot of hers it seems.And this little brat seems to reek of one despite his easygoing cheerful exterior.

Amar is actually pretty popular among the folks here, with adults and kids alike. Yet he sticks, or well stuck, so closely with Lukas of all people, who can be pretty abrasive. I don't think I'm jumping to conclusions to think they're both a certain level of .... complicated, to get along as well as they do. Birds of a feather after all.

I wonder what that says about me.

”Okay then. Don't go. You left for a reason, so don't go back.”

It should be as simple as that. But of course, things are never that simple.

”I think ...I think maybe I will accept?”

He sounds shocked like he doesn't believe it himself either. If I leave him to it we really will just be sitting in silence.

”Is it because Lukas left?”

”No, I don't think so? I'll be useful and it's not like it's forever, just a raid. I'm not actually going back...home. Yeah, I'm not going back there exactly, and I'll be with everyone, it will be ok. I think?”

”What's your favorite food!?”

”Huh?”

”Name your favorite food, or thing there or whatever!”

Smooth Rosalia, much smooth. Sorry I just couldn't take that terrible tense atmosphere anymore. The kid looked so damn sad and lost while trying to gather his thoughts, ah damn it. Where's a professional therapist when you need one? Gable?!

I only get a blank blink before Amar answers almost immediately.

”Pizza. Pizza is my favorite food now.”

”Eh, the pizza we made?”

”Yep!”

Well, that's not too unexpected, pizza is a crowd favorite. Besides he sounds much better than how he was earlier. The air around us seems much more relaxed now, good distraction Rosalia.

”It's funny actually, pizza is one of the reasons I think I can go.”

”Huh?I don't get it, why would that be?”

”It's super good, but really...it made me miss that place a little bit. We don't have your pizza but, it's something similar.”

”A dish similar to pizza?”

Oh now my curiosity is really on and Amar laughs at my sudden alertness. I can go on with food talk for hours.

”No, not really. It's like two dishes actually. It looked a lot like one thing and tasted kind of like another.”

”What! Tell me about them! And make it good!”

I get off from my belly and get into a more comfortable pose ready for market research storytime, leg crossed.

”Haha okay okay! One dish is almost all red because it's hot tomato sauce. There are eggs cracked in and cooked whole and you eat it with bread and stuff. Not bread like the kind here, but a lot like some of the pizza bread. ”

”You mean it's flat? Unleavened?”

”Yeah, a lot of it is flat or it's really big and fluffy and you have to pull it and share with a lot of people. The other dish that tasted a lot like pizza is also flat bread, but the sauce is really thick and full of minced up spicy meat. No cheese though, but that's another bread! And the cheese tastes really good grilled whole. ”

”Are you sure pizza is your favorite? The stuff you're talking about sound really good not going to lie.”

Flatbread? Whole egg and tomato sauce baked dish? My 21st-century mind comes up with images of pita like loaves of bread and Shakshouka, which was really popular at brunches and in social media photos on the internet. It really is yummy.

”Yep! But I do miss some things a bit more. Like cinnamon! I hear it's super expensive so I never had it again here but back home it's not expensive at all and was everywhere. We had this soft rice and milk sweet with lots of cinnamon and it's not my favorite but..”

He sounds a lot better than before and I think that maybe Amar really will be okay stepping into wherever this raid will be. I half-listen to him go on with his childish but detailed descriptions.

I imagine it though, a place where the people look like him, all easy airy beach curls and easier smiles. Everywhere the place smells like cinnamon, spice and grilling flatbread that children can still get excited for.

If it's a place like that then I think things really will be ok.