Chapter 363 (2/2)

I hated her, who tried to kill me and him, and eventually killed my baby. But at the same time, I admired her because she showed dignity and pride until the last moment, which I could never have. I felt betrayed because she broke my trust in her. I was sad because she knew I had never been kind to her.

Since she made me miserable and ignored me to the end, I turned my head away from her because I couldn’t look at her. Yes, I did.

“Tia, I hate you. I hate you! I hate you because you made me feel defeated to the end. I hate you because you made me feel a sense of guilt and despair!”

Yes, I hate you.

I hate you because you never opened your heart to me even though I followed you out of admiration and approached you to get along well like a sister. Although I discovered belatedly that you were not responsible for the stabbing of the emperor and killing my baby, you never told me about it. So, I hate you because I could not say I was sorry, no matter how much I suffered from a sense of guilt about you.

And now that I lost favor with him who once loved me more than you, I hate you. I really hate you for giving me a deep sense of despair because I could not catch up with you no matter how much I tried. I hate you because you made him keep comparing me with you, although I could never surpass you. Without you, or if I had tried harder, he and I could have been happy. That’s why I really hate you so much.

“Yes, I hate you, I hate you…”

My tears came down. I was angry. I could not understand why I had to have hardship, thrown into a strange world without any reason.

I missed my family. I wanted to see their faces who came to my mind when I closed my eyes. I wanted to cry out, burying my face into my mother’s arms. According to what people said, I was the child of God’s prophecy, blessed by God, but I could not understand why God harassed me like this.

“What good is my divine power? What the heck is this?”

When I broke a flower and put it on my hand, a white light came out of it, and the broken branch was reattached.

Obviously, I had extraordinary power, but I didn’t appreciate it at all. If God had to give me any power, I wish He gave me the same power as her. What’s the big deal about my healing power? Before I came to this world, I was surrounded by the best medical staff and lived in a clean environment, so I had no reason to get sick.

I trembled, looking at the empress’ palace in the dark. Now, I had nowhere to go. That’s the only place she had to go, but I didn’t have the heart to move there. I could clearly feel that I was falling out of love with him gradually, but I was frustrated because I didn’t know how to revive his affection for me. I spaced out at the fact that I might have to live like an orphan in this strange land where I had nobody to rely on.

I hated God who sent me here. I had to win his heart back by all means.

So, I decided that I had to make him never abandon me if he could not love me again. Otherwise, I was destined to repeat the fate of the abandoned concubine.

My eyes sparkled intensely when I was moving my steps toward the empress’ palace.