Chapter 58 - A Shield (2/2)

Yera heaved a long sigh before murmuring, ”Really really shameless.”

She could only utter those words to shield herself emotionally because her body had already betrayed her. She knew she could no longer control her own body because that shield had long broken. So there was no use to deny her physical attraction to Xander any longer. Even being hugged from behind by him like this felt good…

But for some reason, she didn't think she deserved this kind of feeling. It felt like she was betraying Bernard... It had not been long since he passed on, so how could she already be attracted to another man? Wasn't it too early to entertain things like this?

She was really at that state, where she was totally confused with the various emotions she was having.

She needed some more time to sort out her feelings because they overwhelmed her.  Was she a coward? Yes, maybe she was… But how could she not be one when she had lost someone that she loved? When Bernard left, her whole world crumbled. The pain was immense that many times after that, she was not even sure if she would be able to live on. How could she forget that kind of agony?

Therefore, right now, she was still shielding herself emotionally. She had to deprive herself of emotions that could make her weak. Especially when she had a battle ahead, which she had to overcome. She could not allow herself any weaknesses that would hinder her from winning.

”What are you thinking about, Darling?” Xander murmured as he noticed that Yera was deep in thought.

”Nothing… I'm just thinking about how to protect myself emotionally because my physical shield is already broken from the tremendous amount of shamelessness that you have,” Yera answered truthfully.

Xander knew Yera was a straightforward person, so he was no longer shocked by her words. Instead, he kissed her neck and shamelessly declared, ”Hmm… Yes, I've obviously broken your physical shield. But your emotional shield is still my top priority, so I guess I should work harder to break it.”

Xander understood Yera very well because Rui had already explained to him about the complexity of her emotional struggle. Just by talking to Yera occasionally, Rui could already tell that she had experienced a lot of tragic things in her life that had caused her to wall herself up emotionally. It was her defense mechanism.

So Xander smiled before he added, ”Don't worry, Darling, your husband has a generous amount of patience. Especially now that I've fallen in love with you, Yera…”

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