5 Different but same (1/2)
The library was a calm and peaceful place. Which was good, because Liu Sumeng's mind was neither of those things. All he could think of was Yuan Xuelan and Yuan Xuelan.
Look at his emperor, all cute and flustered, arguing with the old Auntie from Baiyun Hall.
How he curled his fists and apologized…
How he chivalrously walked Chen Anyue back to her room…
He was feeling a little guilty towards Chen Anyue. Originally, when he first met her, he had neither bad nor good feelings. Though he did do her best to take her into consideration. Liu Fumao had told him to be a good husband so he had spent the majority of his time trying to figure out what that entailed. That was to say, he really never spent this much of his mental power thinking about Yuan Xuelan.
Maybe he should have, because if he did, maybe he could have actually stopped Yuan Xuelan from falling into madness. Maybe, he could have actually done something if their relationship was better earlier on.
”...”
Another wave of depression crashed into him. He closed his eyes and sighed but then remembered why he came to the library in the first place. Actually, he wanted to find something on a Forbidden Technique…
Of course, being a Forbidden Technique, the Heavenly Sword Sect wouldn't just have book and manuals lying around about it, but Liu Sumeng looked anyways. Any information he could find would be better than none.
After scouring almost every title in the library he came upon something suspiciously titled, ”The Forbidden Karma”. It was, in fact, a book about Forbidden Techniques.
But when reading it, Liu Sumeng realized that it was just a book about how each technique would negatively affect one's karma.
”...” It didn't seem very useful. Still, he flipped its pages to the part about Rebirth and diligently read word by word.
In the end, all it really was, was just a long essay about how rebirth was bad for one's karma because it tempered with fate.
Right.
However, the longer he stayed at Wangyun Peak, the more Liu Sumeng began to believe that he really had been reborn.
He had a lot of questions and no answers. For one, why had he been reborn? Just what did he do to achieve this Forbidden Technique? For it to happen so suddenly he could only think that it was very strange. Was there a reason why he specifically was reborn? Was it a freak of nature or was someone behind this situation? And now that he'd been reborn…could he…change what was to come?
Could he possibly mold fate into a different outcome?
The thought was both invigorating and absolutely terrifying.
Light filtered through the sliding door but no one stepped inside. Liu Sumeng looked up, seeing Yuan Xuelan's frowning figure standing at the entrance, as if uncertain about coming in. But he'd been seen already, and it would be even more awkward to run away. Almost reluctantly, Yuan Xuelan entered the library, nodding only the barest as a greeting to Liu Sumeng.
”...” He nodded back, wondering what he could say to this younger Yuan Xuelan. One of the regrets he took to his death was never saying all the things he wanted to Yuan Xuelan. But now that the man(although at the moment, he was just a boy) was in front of him once more, he couldn't say anything.
In his memories, an older Yuan Xuelan, one that went by Taixu and was hailed as emperor smirked at him and chided, ”Silly Sumeng, why are you so awkward? Can't you do something about that personality of yours?” But even when Liu Sumeng was short of words and facial expressions Yuan Xuelan still read him like the back of his hand.
Sorry Yuan Xuelan, this Ivory Sword Saint was probably the most awkward person in the world.
”If you're looking for manuals on weapon enchantments they're on the south wall. For magical tool crafting, you might need a ladder. They're on the top three shelves next to the westward pillar.” His voice was soft and monotone, eyes gazing back at the book in his hand but he couldn't seem the recognize any of the characters at all.
Yuan Xuelan narrowed his eyes. All he saw was the beautiful Ivory Sword Saint sitting down at a long wooden table with a book in his slender fingers, lashes downturned and face set like polished jade. With pristine robes draped over a tall, fit body, this Ivory Sword Saint really lived up to his name in appearance, for he was no different than one of those cheap romanticize paintings of heroes and deities that women secretly collected behind their husbands' backs.
Who in the world could trust a man with such an appearance? Not to mention, Yuan Xuelan couldn't help but get a creepy feeling from this guy who was supposed to be his Shijie's future husband. Why did he know what Yuan Xuelan came to look for anyways? Ok sure, Young Master Yuan of the Ascending Dawn Sect had a well-known interest regarding magical tools and weapons but still.
Yuan Xuelan bit his lip, feeling unsure, ”I don't need your help.”
Long lashes fluttered, Liu Sumeng peered up from behind the pages of his book, ”I know.” His voice was like the first coming of winter.
Yuan Xuelan flinched and instantly turned away, facing the stack of books and scrolls. Silently, he still refused to admit defeat, even as he slowly shuffled towards the pillar the Ivory Sword Saint spoke about earlier, ”I'll be honest with you, since no one else is around,” he boldly said, ”I don't trust you with my Shijie.”
”...” Liu Sumeng inwardly pointed out that actually, he had already said the same thing in public. Thinking about it, the Yuan Xuelan that died in his arms trusted him with not only his life but also his death. Ah, didn't that happen just days ago? Suddenly, Liu Sumeng's throat felt dry.