Part 4 (1/2)
”'No! no! no! You've large inards, Jonathan; and your youngest son,--Young Aot such a pair of eyes! I' in three cheers for Hail Columbia, alreat pirates: pray be hbors, and spare me my Independence Your little place down there is beco of innocent blood in streams at the caprice of imbecile princes, who make the bones and blood of their subjects the waste material hich to serve their incarnate ambition, tells me to beware Beware of ambitious princes; the world would be well rid of them!'
”'Like to hear you talk so, Uncle Jacob Reckon how you've studied in a New England school! There the greatest power springs from the humble people Anyhow, Jacob, since we can't strike a trade, nor do a thing or two in the way of speculation, s'pose we take a drop of whiskey punch?'
”'Can't object to that,' he returned
”So, Littlejohn and me set about it, and in a very few minutes had a first-class punch brewed, of which old Jacob supped most lavishly In fact, he liked it so well that I reckoned he had forgotten to stop drinking; and Littlejohn felt soet fuddled and turn everything over John reckoned I'd better give him a cold julep to wipe doith; but Jacob said he s, that his profession was quite cold enough So, after we put the punches down, and s careful how I proceeded, we loosened the strings and bid hiht, and Jacob had to be jogging Just as I was leaving, eous territory he had spread out to a feller's eyes, without the slightest chance of h to get a foothold
”Westent with breathless speed, soon losing sight of Jacob and his luive way, and you tuo into ,' said Littlejohn, who had kept very quiet up to this time
”'Not a bit of it!' I answered, 'our de You s to the heart, and springs froed,--to shows signs of very bad nature Knowing this was ood-natured in cases of E ill-te can be made at it, is most absurd
”The world outside of the United States is inclined to believe A next to infernal--that itit comes in contact with into dollars, cents, and republicanisency As for Littlejohn, he thought that in addition to our speculative spirit we should be governed by modesty, an example of which his forefathers had set us This he reconity, gaining one half his object through the influence of his mien Many said this was the precise material General Pierce was most deficient in; and that if the General would preserve nity and less bluster his ad with the true character of the nation Old Uncle John could brag stoutly; but Jonathan was a a look over our wonderful West, and asked by what singular process of diploot to many fine states, so richly burdened with natural resources? He reckoned we o-ahead principles over the French, Spanish and Mexicans, and then insinuated ourselves into their dolishman's ideas whittled down to the very point of self-conceit, Sood-natured and make the best of his calood friends; strife is the dire ene to overthrow those principles of constitutional liberty, both nations so wisely combined in their constitutions Why tear down the noble edifice you cannot rebuild? why blight the cheering prospects of thousands to gratify the vain ambition of pedantic politicians?
”'Hallo! Smooth, my dear fellohat place is this below?' cries out Littlejohn, looking over, as the balloon made a B line ard
”'That,' I interrupted, 'used to be called the 'far West' Now it is getting to be the centre of civilization It goes ahead of theco up the ry and oppressed citizen this side of sun-down We can already raise anything,--from mountain of corn to a river of pork,--on it; and as for the nigger crop, there's no end of that!'
”'And that yours, too, Mr Smooth? Your fertile acres stretch fro, pointed all over the broad expanse below He had no generalized ideas of A powers, and less knowledge of that overnht how this estern expanse was destined for the back-bone of the htiest republic the world ever knew People without homes in the old world found happy homes there; civilization drove the buffalo froive place toard 'Now, Littlejohn' said I, 'seeing that your people have but an ie of our country, let e of rocky h to split the wind, but as tough as Uncle Seth's whip-stock, cli his hat on it, --(in accordance with necessity and the go-ahead spirit of our country)--hung the in a snowstorm, whistled Yankee Doodle three times and proclaimed them ours in the name of the United States All this was so-ahead, all-accomplished diplomacy'
”'Ah!' interrupted Littlejohn, 'your appetite for bits of territory runs ive us your hand-on that point we may honestly embrace, and declare ourselves now even two You are as modest as an archbishop on salary day, and seldom openly embrace territory; we prefer the frank style in all our adoptions Let us not quarrel over that--you love freedohts are h self-interest may vary them To be mutually just toward each other, to live on terms of friendshi+p, and preserve that areat principles which conserves and preserves our happiness Yea! cursed be the hand, and stagnate the breath raised against that peace and good-hich saves us frorasped firot the past and thought only of the future Looking down, 'that is New Mexico,' said I, 'a se establishment; we let all these little ones coenerous mother watches their wants and provides for them as circumstances deularly cold diet; in fact, you often permit them to become stunted and ill-tempered for want of proper care in the home nursery
You see, Texas ell nursed, and now her territory is fast filling up with the hardy sons and daughters of your land; but, would they becoes, they must divest themselves of those servilities which in your country one class unfortunately endeavors to enforce upon the other' John bowed, but gave no further heed Presently we ca es 'We always had inconsistencies in our social systeot, and what a nice thing they are lish' John looked very innocent and honest, which, added to his dignity so naturally put on, was enough to make one's face square up into a broad smile
”'Pers; this Mormon evil ork its own remedy! Westward the wave of empire rolls on; that's the e speak as the world looks on, grudgingly acknowledging its truth We nurture sreat; weequals, not inferiors; we put the lowly eress, and froood harvest for all By sinking froain greatness to our nation Siood as Blackwood Broadway; and Blackwood is made sensible of the fact that he is no better in the body politic than any other man'
”'Now, Sic,' said Littlejohn; 'the safer a man feels his position the better is it for the nation; but the policy of equality inplace, never would do for ours Age and its attendant glories deuidance for society All your fancy articles of freedo co practice Our people, sir--takeinnovations; their grades of society are a sacred protection'
”'Ah! those are English opinions, iron-bound Your social institution is a perfect curiosity shop, where everything old may be stored away unmolested, but upon which the man of plain sense looks distrustfully, while sycophants waste conte means for its preservation Ho esti those ancient inconsistencies so preserved by governments of the old world!'
”'Never s are our own, and on us will the evil recoil Be not so earnest in conde us, for the sa themselves in your would-be fashi+onable society! Your society is fashi+onable without being refined Your aristocracy is a base i of gold, and vaunting of bad English' John looked down ere he finished, and seereat Utah territory The Great Salt Lake I assured hied his ballast of salt bags As for the settlers on its borders, they were the followers of Joe Smith, a veritable descendant of Haood he did That clever lish opinion, the _Times_, says they will one day confuse and cause much trouble to the people of the United States; but this is only the offspring of that one strong idea so characteristic of Mr John Bull
Now these descendants of the veritable Se delusion in which there cannot be much happiness; but beyond this they are a very har many wives (and if this be a sin, it may be found at many a cleaner door!), may be excused from much they do
”'One word, if you please, Mr Smooth!' suddenly interrupted John Littlejohn,--'it is in that the dangerous element of your Yankee nature exists Once beyond the neutralizing sphere of public opinion, you go in for all sorts of vagaries, the more inconsistent with strict order the better' This crimination was certainly as fast as out of place; John was, indeed, too ready to censure us without a forethought We had given these deluded creatures a hoh most of them were subjects of that land of freedoive place to flunkeyism; we had protected theenerous, and forgive their errors rather than punish or provoke the delusion? Preferring inally American: on that score Uncle John cannot shake clean the skirts of his garment, nor proclaim his virtue as white as snow Ere this conversation ended we had arrived over California Standing up I gave three long and strong cheers that astonished and awoke John froreat El Dorado spread out in golden plains, tee their rich treasures into Uncle Saht and full of busy life, rose San Francisco, the stars and stripes waving gracefully from a thousand te, rode on the cal of merchants filled her broad avenues; while houseless, anxious, and never-despairing old A country, by the aid of that Anglo-Saxon energy which carries liberty and civilization into the reiant, fro State Already was it a world of industry, everyfor the ratification,--the sight was bright of promise; but, he added, he much feared his countryht becoanization of very fashi+onable society We were made up of an indescribable co his shoulders and changing slightly his position He forgot that the absence of two of the greatest evils a nation groans under had brought its blessings on our land,--Mr Smooth refers to pauper lords, and lords whofrom the commonest ranks to take the best care of the nation They discarded the expensive nonsense of nity which polluted independence: they respect the poor hten his prospects; they seek to proood of all and fear not the few!
”Ss he will join hi at a rapid rate we had well nigh lost sight of the El Dorado, when Johntranslated, lass of hot punch To this proposition I readily consented; after which we lighted two real Havanas, and rolled on as resolute as a flying Dutchman It ith sos The punch, being placed in the right place, seehts 'Queer fellows you are!' says he, to talk of freedoot a human property market open, and more than three millions of souls up for a bid Mark my word, Mr Smooth, the voice of sorrow for your human commerce will yet shake the stability of your country When slavery drives this country to sectional issues; when it corrupts the federal pohen it serves the an broils; when patriotic men, North and South, ceased to come forward for the safety of a confederation, then will sectionalisainst a noble edifice, whose foundation history tells us e of strife'
CHAPTER X
SMOOTH PRESERVES YOUNG AMERICA'S RIGHTS
”Day dawned through the graythe old institution, we sailed swiftly through the air, over the calm Pacific Soon San Francisco seemed but a speck in the dim distance
On, on, on, we sped, until the land passed far out of sight behind