Chapter 200 - Happiness (1/2)

“Hao Ning,” Xiao Hong’s voice rose again, “Don’t badger with Grannie Meng anymore. We have no much time left. We should hurry up.”

“I’d rather so as well,” Hao Ning said with a bitter face, “but how! Do you have money with you?”

“You—are talking to whom?” The male Grannie Meng felt confused watching Hao Ning murmuring to himself and got impatient, “Will you pay the money? If not, go back and queue!”

“Your grandfather I have no money!” Xiao Hong’s voice was roared out by Hao Ning. Hao Ning’s hand trembled, and then the whole counter was on fire in a boom. So powerful was Samadhi True Fire that the whole counter disappeared, “Your grandfather I want to drink it now, so give it to me!”

Before the male Grannie Meng reacted, from the back of Hao Ning came countless voices, “Jesus! There are burglars here!”

Hao Ning turned back, only to find none.

“Where are they?” Hao Ning asked, bewildered, “Why did they disappear all of a sudden?”

“They were frightened by you.” The male Grannie Meng said easily, “Why didn’t they hide, seeing you so fierce?”

“Then why didn’t you escape?” Hao Ning, peering at the moveless male Grannie Meng, felt admirable in his heart, “So brave you are! For that, I won’t bully you anymore. Ah, you’re done with the soup. But no one is queueing, anyway. I don’t need to pay in this case, do I? Give me the soup, OK?”

“Hum, nice delusions of you!” The male Grannie Meng said, “I didn’t escape because—I was scared to pee by you. It would be shameful if I rushed out before all the souls got dispersed. So finally, I can run away now—Help! Someone’s provoking the nether world! Help!”

Then the male Grannie Meng rushed out like a nut, with some liquid dripping from his trousers. The male Grannie Meng dashed out of the shop to a restaurant-like place nearby, and he didn’t come out again.

“How does it taste?” Hao Ning, seeing that everyone had fled, didn’t care about too much and took the soup, meant to have a sniff. It suddenly occurred to him that the result of sniffing it was still unknown, so he said urgently, “Xiao Hong, release Zhou Yuan’s parents now!”

As he talked, something flashed before his eyes and Zhou Yuan’s parents appeared. Hao Ning hastily handed them two cups of lemon-flavored Lethe Water, “Uncle and aunt, drink this and go for your reincarnation…”

“I don’t like lemon flavor.” Auntie Zhou held Lethe Water and frowned, “Is there some in soybean-milk-flavor?”

“I don’t like lemon flavor, either.” Uncle Zhou put down Lethe Water, “I want some in tofu flavor. The salty one, please.”

“No way, it should be sweet!” auntie Zhou groaned, “How are you going to enjoy the salt tofu! It’s unbearable!”

“Such a grannie as you!” Uncle Zhou said angrily, too, “I love the salty one. You’ve divorced me, so why do you keep dictating such trifles?”

“You two!” Hao Ning, seeing the two funny olds quarreling here, got mad and took two cups of Lethe Water in both hands separately and fed the two, leaving them no time for contradicting, “Where did you get so many craps? Drink it up!”

“Who’s there? Who dares to provocate the nether world?” Hao Ning had scarcely pushed the two to drain the Lethe Water when a voice came from his back, “You feel impatient about your tedious life? Are you courting death?”

“Niu, they come here for reincarnations because they’ve got enough of their lives.” Another voice said, “Such craps of you. Meanwhile, they’re not courting death. They’re dead already.”

“Ma, stop your craps!” The voice before said, “You lost the stone scissor paper. Remember you go first later!”

Hao Ning understood instantly that ox-headed and horse-faced demons were coming. He hurriedly asked in his head, “Xiao Hong, can you deal with it?”

“I can.” Xiao Hong’s voice was hesitant, “But it’s not good to displease nether world. We’d better be more submissive. After all, we come with our request.”

“You, I say you. Turn back!” The two voiced said in sync, “You frightened our Little Meng, and you ruined our shop!”

Hao Ning could do nothing but turn back in a nervous face. The moment he saw the two demons, he busted into laughter. The ox-headed and horse-faced demons were actually two people wearing masks made of white cardboard, with the two words ox-headed and horse-faced written on them respectively!

“You nether world has such difficult financial condition…” Hao Ning failed to hold back his teasing, “They don’t offer you a headgear?”

“No craps!” The two asked, “What are you doing here? Why did you destroy our shop?”

“As to that…” Hao Ning got nervous and stepped back. His mobile phone fell to the ground with a crackle and the screen lightened instantly.

“What’s this?” Ox-headed saw the mobile on the ground and asked. He stretched out his hand and the mobile flew into his hand, “Which magic weapon is this?”

“Don’t you know the mobile?” Hao Ning asked in confusion, “You’ve got the tea for mourning, but you don’t know about mobile? You’ve got the screen for the emission of ads, but you don’t know about mobile?”

“No.” The two said in sync, “What’s it for?”

Hao Ning scratched his head, seeing that the two had wrapped up the topic about the shop, “Em… Do you know about making a phone call?”

“No.”

“Telecommuting?” Hao Ning had a think and went on.

“Shagging the males remotely?” The two glimpsed at each other and shook their heads, “No way. We’re both males. No matter how remote it is, we don’t want to shag a male. Is there anything about shagging a female remotely?”

Hao Ning was near a breakdown. He was like a cock talking to a duck. Something suddenly occurred to him and he smiled to say, “It’s for games.”

“Games?” The two glanced at each other and asked Hao Ning, “Is it even funnier than stone, paper, and scissors?”