Part 77 (1/2)
She prefers poverty with love to luxury with an indifferent or loveless husband
How gladly would these wohted by cold indifference or the unfaithfulness of their husbands, exchange their liberal allowance, their luxuries, for genuine sympathy and affection!
One of the most pathetic spectacles in A helpless in the shadow of her husband's prosperity and power, having sacrificed her youth, beauty, and a that the feminine mind holds dear--to enable an indifferent, selfish, brutish husband to get a start in the world
It does not matter that in her unselfish effort to help hi stove; that she lost , and rearing and caring for their children during the slavery of her earlythose terrible years of poverty and privation Just as soon as the selfish husband begins to get prosperous, finds that he is succeeding, feels his power, he often begins to be asha toto see any huhted by the lack of love; but it is doubly pathetic to see a woets in return only her board and clothes and an allowance, great or small
Some men seem to think that the precept, ”Man does not live by bread alone,” was not meant to include woman They can not understand why she should not be happy and contented if she has a comfortable home and plenty to eat and wear They would be surprised to learn that ive up luxuries and live on bread and water, if she could only have her husband's sye of her stifled talents
I know a very able, pro man who says that if he had had a rich father he never would have developed his creative power; that his aled; that it was the desperate struggle to make a place for himself in the world that developed the real irl who had ed by the hardest kind of work and sacrifice to pay her way through college She had just begun to develop her power, to feel her wings, when her husband caged her in his hohest incentive for self-development He said that ahad no business to ave her horses and carriages and servants But all the ti her self-reliance, taking away all inality
At first the as very eager to work Her ailded chains by which she was bound She was restless, nervous, and longed to use her powers to do so for herself and the world
But her husband did not believe in a wos she wished to do He wanted his wife to look pretty and fresh when he returned fro and to shi+ne in society He was proud of her beauty and vivacity He thought he loved her, but it was a selfish love, for real love has a tender regard for a person's highest good, for that person's sake
Gradually the glamour of society, the lethe of a luxurious life, paralyzed her anition, until at length she subsided into a life of almost total inaction
Multitudes of wo in luxurious ho narrow, superficial, rutty lives, because the spur of necessity has been taken away from them; because their husbands, who do not want the environment
But a life of leisure is not the only way of paralyzing the development of a wife's individuality It can be done just as effectively by her becoe wife is confined to her horeat deal too much
Many women do not seem to have any existence outside of the little home orbit; do not have any special interests or pleasures to speak of apart froht up to think that wives have very little purpose in life other than to be the slaves and playthings of their lords andup children, and to keep round
The ishes to hold her husband's affection, if he is arow, must keep pace with him mentally She must make a continual investment in self-iroill coradual loss of physical charressive man he is not likely to admire a ho stands still mentally Admiration is a very important part of love
You may be very sure that if you have an a to keep up with hi silly novels, dressing stylishly and waiting for hiht If he sees that your sun rises and sets in him, that you have little interest outside, that you are not broadening and deepening your life in other ways by extending your interests, reaching out for self-enlargement, self-improvereat strain upon his love
It is i to appreciate the transfor power that comes from liberal education and broad culture For the sake of her husband and children and her own peace of mind and satisfaction, she should try to improve herself in every possible way Think of what it means to be able to surround one's home with an atence!
The quality of one's own ideals has a great deal to do with the quality of the ideals of one's family
Even considered alone frouard, a woe education, if possible The conditions of home life in this country are such that it is very difficult for the wife to keep up with her husband's growth, to keep pace with hi, sti environreat power of application and concentration and plenty of leisure, she is likely to drop behind her husband