Vol 2 Chapter 4 (1/2)

Chapter 4 - Confession

Nayuki and Akiko didn’t askout late

“It’s snowing noare of the cars, okay?”

“Wear so warm You don’t want to catch a cold”

All they said were reminders for my care

Curling the scarf over the collar of

Kaori didn’t say anything happened in the phone She said with her usual calm tone, “Can you come out for a moment?”

I agreed without asking why

The street la snowflakes

In this quiet night, my footsteps were particularly loud

The air was cold, so cold thatto the back ofthem numb I walked without hesitation I knew very clear what Kaori was planning to say For this, I could forget the cold I would bet et it

Kaori was standing in front of the closed school gate

She was alone, wearing her uniforht below the shower of the street la no heed to the snow fallen on her shoulders and her hair

“Here I am”

“…too slow”

“Is this the first thing when you call someone out?”

I sht Kaori was in

“What’s up?”

Kaori didn’t respond

“…Is it about shi+ori?”

I asked, thinking it the correct guess Suddenly Kaori spread the white piece of paper on her hand

“Look”

The white paper looked like a child’s drawing, a portrait, probably Drawn there was a girl with long hair and big eyes

“This is me”

Kaori glared at the girl in the drawing

“This is what ave me on my birthday It was the first present I received from her”

“Your sister…”

“Yes My only sister”

A pale tone

Still, Kaori would say she had a sister now, contrary to what she had said The word sister she said and theit carried was completely opposed between then and now

“…My sister was born with a weak body”

Kaori said, as if reciting a story

“When I got this drawing, she was already in hospital I’ this to me”

While I hear her words, I looked at the drawing like she did

Then on the other end of the drawing paper, I could see two young girls

In the children’s ward decorated by origa board

Seeing that scene was another girl

“Before that, this weak child caught most of the love from her parents To tell the truth, I am bit jealous But even when this child was in pain, she would still crawl up from her bed She said she had to make it to her sister’s birthdayand she then smiled”

The other girl with a resistant look was caught by the sirl, and soon her expression pacified

After that, she received the drawing that was difficulty made

“Back then, it was my first time that I was so happy I cried,” Kaori continued

The two sisters who had got on better terether, to share their feelings The older sister told the younger one who couldn’t go to school all the interesting things about school and lessons The younger sister told the older one the books she read when she was alone, and how she had taken the her the illustrated stories she created

“Whenever the visiting tio ho her”

Kaori’s lips showed a hint of smile

“She always comforted me…when in realty, she was the one as left alone, who should experience more loneliness and pain”

Yet her sound was beginning to tremble

“We still say, though, that she had to get better one day We would proether forever”

“…”

Under this air-freezing snow, I just stood there listening to Kaori’s words

“My sister got in and out of the hospital again and again When she hit the age to go to school, she insisted, despite her parents’ disagreement, that she had to wear the same uniforainst her parents’ words”

A dark red one piece, a white cape, and a big ribbon near the chest to indicate the year Many girls run to apply for this school just to wear this classically designed uniform

“She wore the same uniform as I, went to the sa forward to these insignificant things”

As if she had to protect the portrait from the snow, Kaori held it to her chest

“But she…”

“She only went to school once, aht?”

Kaori nodded

“I thought her condition would get better and continue her studies But I rong My parents and the doctor knew letting her go to school and wear a unifor but consolation”

“Consolation…”

Silence followed Then all of a sudden Kaori looked up at me

“Aizawa-kun, you once told me you liked that child, didn’t you?”

“Yeah”

“Do you still like her now?”

“I will still like her”

“…even if she disappears later?”

Startled, I became unable to breathe

“What do you mean?”

I knew the most important moment had finally come

“I mean what I said”

“…”

“The doctor said she probably won’t make it to her next birthday”

Isn’t the scene we are in now like those scenes we often see in soap operas?

shi+ori’s catchphrase streamed into my mind the moment I heard Kaori said that

The declaration of parting had to come, and soon

So away from our feet, and some to be darkness upon our eyes

I had neither of these feelings

Onlyon the corner of my mind: this really is a scene in a soap opera; it really exists

Then I said, according to the lines in a soap opera

“When’s shi+ori’s birthday?”

How long could shi+ori live?

“The first day next month”

“Wha…”

She had only a week left

When I thought of the short time she had, I can only put on an empty smile

Even when she had been s, in such joy?

She was so weak…and her skin so white it seeetic to eat ice creahts with me

Even in her situation, she pro the ball next year Will all of these things never come true? Is this why she would so for the future she doesn’t have?

“Does shi+ori know this?”

Kaori nodded

“I told her”

“Why did you?”

“Because she asked me Why…why am I reluctant to face her nowadays?”

“…”

Kaori eavesdropped it from a conversation between her parents

“I…”

Her voice would tremble at times, but she had always spoken with a clear tone But now, she changed

Her brows furrowed, she bit her treo, the waver in her heart was dictated

“Since then, I have fled fro toher own fate”

Glistening tears ca from her, she almost fell down I supported her by the shoulder She leaned on

“If she cried, if she hated me, I would have felt better Whenever she smiles, I will think of the day when I couldn’t see her smile, and it terrifies me The more I love her, the more depressed I become”

Even when shi+ori knew her condition, she still folded and ironed her unifor it on the wall every day

“I wish I could wear this uniform like you sooner”

She kept s to Kaori Sure, Kaori wanted to answer, yet she couldn’t

“If I had to experience the pain of losing her…it would have been better if I…”

Kaori seeth in her speech

“…if I hadn't had a sister in the first place…”

After that, Kaori fell on the snow ground, holding her sister’s drawing, continuing her sobs in silence

I said nothing, letting her lean on my chest

Her love

Kaori’s feeling was the same as mine

We allowed snowflakes to stack on our shoulders Standing under the street lamps, we stood still

Shards of snow carried by the ere assailing us

I didn’t knoent first, but we had started heading to our respective homes

Kaori, who had regained her speech, said then, “That child’s condition is pretty good recently She had been getting weaker by the day, but lately her condition is stable”

Even the doctors didn’t want to believe it

“Perhaps it’s because of you, Aizawa-kun”

“…I did nothing”

My ignorancearound with shi+ori

Kaori shook her head and sh her birthday Still, it doesn’t change the fact she’s going to be gone one day”

With that said, her eyes returned sombre

And before we part and leave, Kaori looked at me and asked, “For what reason was the child born?”

Unable to answer her, I could only leave with our backs facing each other

The second day, Kaori was absent at school

“How rare,” Nayuki said

Kitagawa too,on his hands, he looked at Kaori’s empty seat with a bored look

“It ht be a cold or whatnot”

“Kaori would still come to school if it’s a cold She said she enjoyed schoolat home”

“Nayuki”

“Yes?”

Do you knohat Kaori’s troubles are? Do you knohat she is thinking behind her usual cold face?

Of course, I didn’t ask her Even if I did, nothing would have changed

“Why don't we go to the cafeteria today for lunch?”

“What a chance Don’t you have to go to that girl today?”

“Why did you know?!”

I couldn’t let out an exclamation of surprise Everyone in the class turned their heads to me

“Are you even trying to pretend duh this ould know,” Kitagawa said, with a teasing face

“My mistake”

“Aizawa, you’re so slow sometimes”

“We’ll support you from beside, Yuichi”

“…”

If they said this totopic to kill boredom

But now it nothing but an extension of lamentation

“Is anything wrong? The weather is fine today”

“I don’t have any courage to go to the court now,” I said

“Are there any wild dogs there?” Kitagawa prompted

“Where do they come from?”

“There was one before that caused big trouble for the school for a while”

I don’t care if it’s dogs, I said and went to the cafeteria

Nayuki and Kitagawa followed me

Students filled the busy cafeteria There were a lot of awa had a Chinese rice set, Nayuki set A, and the two of the their plates

“We’re going to have exams next time Bad luck”

“Can Kaori help us?”

We had an everyday conversation in the lunch break I had alotten there was such a time in the day

Does shi+ori know that I met Kaori yesterday?

Whether she knew it or not, she wouldn’t speak a thing about it If I still went to the court today, she would give ently say, “You’re late, Yuichi-senpai” and the like

Mere iination almost broke the dam of my tears

For what reason was the child born?

I could still see Kaori’s sorrowful look behind shi+ori’s s that I couldn’t notice the truth, and angry at my inability to take measures There was no plan I could think of

I couldn’t go to the court

“Won’t you eat, Yuichi?”

Nayuki pried at ly

“I want to eat ice cream…”

I wanted to ulate my emotions

“I’ll buy it for you, then”

“You don’t have to”

“What are you…?”

Kitagawa, sitting on the other side, heaved a sigh I rose to my feet abruptly

“I’ the afternoon lessons”