Part 15 (2/2)

To be given such things is not a coift--intention, consciousness, preparation, coation later The event is also colory) by the second person, since the giftone's eyes, to be aware of a coin--that is sheer rapture Other things can be exciting too, but a coin is best, because a coin is rarely identifiable by a previous owner; and I as the ownershi+p of which could not possibly be traced To find things which have to be surrendered is as impure a joy as the world contains, and no theme for this pen

The special quality of the act of finding so, with its consequent exhilaration, is half unexpectedness and half separateness There being no warning, and the article co to you by chance, no one is to be thanked, no one to be owed anything In short, you have achieved the greatest hu That is the true idea: the ”nothing” must be absolute; oneintention, or even hope To look for things is to change the whole theory--to rob it of its divine suddenness; to become anxious, even avaricious; to partake of the nature of the rag-picker, the _chiffonier_, or those strangethe shore after a storreat moment, once, in the island of Coll, when after two hours' syste things is at once so rare and pure a joy that to trifle with it is peculiarly heartless Yet are there people so wantonly in need of sport as to do so Every one knows of the purse laid on the path or pavement beside a fence, which, as the excited passer-by stoops to pick it up, is twitched through the palings by its adherent string There is also the coin attached to a thread which can be dropped in the street and instantly pulled up again, setting every eye at a pavement scrutiny

Could there be lower tricks? I fear so, because soreat days of a rendezvous of Bohe (I have been told) once nailed a bad but plausible sovereign to the floor and waited events In the case of the purse and string the butts are few and far between and there is usually only a small audience to rejoice in their discomfiture, but the _denoue were the warp and woof at the Marble Halls was only too bitterly public

I auile, that very few of those who saw the coin and ht away, because had they done so the action ht have been noticed and the booty claimed Instead, the discoverer would look swiftly and stealthily round, and then gradually and with every affectation of nonchalance (which to those in the secret, watching from the corners of their wicked eyes, was so funny as to be an agony) he would get nearer and nearer until he was able at last to place one foot on it

This acco like real naturalness, and, practically certain of his prey, take things easily for a moment or so Often, I am told, the poor dupe would, at this point, whistle the latest tune Even noever, he dared not abandon subterfuge, or his prize, were he seen to pick it up, ht have to be surrendered or shared; so the nextto pick up both it and the sovereign together Such explosions of laughter as followed upon his failure to do so can (I am informed) rarely have been heard

--Such was the conspiracy of the nailed sovereign, which, now and then, the victirin frohted spectator of his successor's humiliation

Can you conceive of a more impish hoax? But I should like to have witnessed it

PUNCTUALITY

Aood resolutions for the New Year I very nearly included the deterain I held

For a long while it had been, with me, a point of honour to be on tihteous on thetoo caustically those with a laxer standard But towards the close of 1919 doubts began to creep in For one thing, ements to the letter; taxis were scarce and trains and omnibuses crowded, so that in order to be punctual one had to walk and thus lose many precious minutes; for another, I had such a number of appointments which were not kept by the other parties that I had to take the anisation of a rather exacting time-table at a period when I was unusually busy Moreover, while waiting for a late friend, it is i--one is too ian to ask ry and cross, and why should they do all the arriving-when-everything-is-ready? Why should not the roles be reversed?

When conscription came in and martial habits became the rule, I had hoped and believed that punctuality was really likely to be established

I thought this because one had always heard so much about Army precision, and also because my most punctual friend for ed in a rivalry in thethe War the soldiers horatitude to them, while the first de forty minutes for dinner

The pity of it is that this particular tarrying guest is ato our own Samuel Smiles or the author of that fae to Colonel House,” he ought to be, all would be well; but he is not; he has never been punctual in his life and he has had an exceptionally successful career The books tell us that the unpunctual man is disqualified in the race for fortune; that no one will e of appointments is a test both of character and quality Business age no one, no matter what his attainments, who does not arrive promptly But these hard and fast sche Wisdom, after all, is an element in business success; and ise man would ever be punctual at his dentist's? What kind of respect a dentist has for his first appointment of the day, I cannot tell I have avoided these early seances; but every one knows that he is never ready for a patient at the covenanted hour after that Editors usually keep their visitors waiting No theatrical er has ever been on tie, because, apart fro to do Rehearsals are one ie upon the routine of an ordered existence; and yet actors are a very happy folk

Until late in 1919, as I have said, I had loved Punctualia with a true ardour; but I now found myself sufficiently free from passion to be able to exaood deal to be said against her

To be always correct is a dangerous thing I have noticed that the people who are late are often so much jollier than the people who have to wait for the deeply into the matter, I realised that Punctualia, for all her coreatis inexorable If you are late for the train, you miss it; and if you are not in it and it is wrecked, you live on--to miss others I recalled one very remarkable case in point which happened in hter, had arranged to spend a holiday in the Channel Islands A cab in time only to whip his horse all the way across London and miss the train by a minute When, the next day, it was learned that the Channel Islands boat had struck the Casquettes and had gone down the ladies were so excited by their escape that they sought the cabratitude adopted one of his numerous children That is a true story, and it is surely a very eloquent supporter of an anti-punctual policy Had the ladies caught the train they would have been drowned, and the cab would have lacked any but the most elementary education

Can you wonder, then, that I nearly included a deter o so far I left it at the decision not to be so particular about punctuality as I used to be

THE OTHER TWO

It is ood or ill fortune to have taken a furnished flat at a dizzy altitude in the neighbourhood of that London terminus which is at once nearest the sea and the Promised Land Immediately above the flat is a spacious roof, which affords a pleasant retreat in the cool of the evening and coents call an extensive prospect, and where, at s may be met The flat itself consists of a nuraphs of es of a schoolboy's album are covered with stamps There are more men than women, and more women than children The men have obsolete beards; several of the woether with their heads inclining towards each other at an affectionate angle, which, although affectionate, does not render the thought impossible that each sister secretly is convinced that she is the handsoan pipes These photographs not only hang on the walls but they swarm in frames about the mantelpieces and the occasional tables The occasional tables are so nuine this their stud faredy The larderhaving been left open by the previous occupants, a large slate-coloured pigeon, with sche in it, and, at the veryto lay another To this achievement I personally should have had no objection; but the porter, as showing me round, and who has a sense of decorum more proper to such apartments, had other views, and before I could interfere he had re, brushed away the nest, and closed theThat ended his share of the draeon, with a depth of reproachfulness in its eyes that is extre desperate efforts to get in, so that I creep about feeling like Herod During Baby Week it was almost unbearable Even when I a

The flat is conspicuous in possessing, in addition to nuht porter to work the lift, who is never visible, and a day porter who, having been forbidden by the powers that be to use the lift before two o'clock in the afternoon, scrupulously obeys the new regulation, except when he has to ascend to an upper floor hies, s that refuse to be lifted by any but a Hercules, and doors (ten in all) not one of which will remain open except by artificial means Whether or not this is a peculiarity of Westminster architecture I cannot say, but all the doors are alike They each quickly but reently that the latch does not catch, and every breath of draught (and we by no means stop at breaths) sways them noisily to and fro with a sound that is excessively irritating to the nerves I have therefore either to go to the door and fasten it or find so hich to fix it open Norht fro-roo-roo but dine--are supplied with door-stops of their own, consisting each of an elephant's foot mounted with brass Picturea devotee of the study and the shelf as to be less of a big-ga about this intensely sophisticated flat carrying frole or the African forest (I don't knohich) in order to prevent a London door fro Iruous

If there were four of these feet I should be more at ease But there are only two of theh to know that elephants are quadrupeds Where then are the other two? That is the question which is wearinginto an uneasy sleep, hear a heavy stu the door to burst open and the other half of the elephant to advance upon htmare, but never rey and threatening, but coos like an exiled pigeon