Chapter 12 - Volume 2 (2/2)

“For the person who had irresponsibly copulated with a man, irresponsibly had a child, and irresponsibly ran away from the village by herself— to try and come back and act as a mother now! How barefaced could someone be after abandoning their child for 40 years!”

“Your highness.”

“I’ll kill her!”

I shouted.

“I’ll cut off her tongue, break her limbs, and throw her in a pig sty. It’s only appropriate for that kind of mongrel to receive divine punishment. If the Gods are neglecting their duty then there’s no choice but for me to punish her in their stead!”

“Your highness.”

Lapis Lazuli looked straight at me.

“Compose yourself. There is no reason for your highness to dirty your hands.”

“No, there is more than enough reason, Lala. You are my lover. Be it a false cover or not you are still my fiancée. The ridicule you receive thus becomes my humiliation. The ridicule I receive thus becomes your humiliation. How could there possibly be no value!?”

“……”

“Don’t worry. How could I possibly tell you to kill your own mother. Just wait patiently. I’ll take care of it discretely. I’ll make sure to not allow that kind of trash from ever intervening with your life ever again. First bribe the guards and……”

Slap

I wasn’t able to comprehend what had happened to me for a moment.

It was because it was something that I had never expected to happen.

I looked at Lapis Lazuli with a dazed face, still unable to believe what had happened.

“Lord Dantalian.”

“……”

“This one said to compose yourself.”

The feeling in my chest settled down.

Lala had slapped me just now.

That itself was not a problem. Did I not also hit her cheek several times earlier? An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. She naturally had the rights to hit me as well. However, the fact that ‘Lazuli had hit me’ was what gave me a shock.

“Lala……”

“Has your highness finally calmed down?”

“I’m sorry. I did not hit you earlier because I wanted to. I apologize for swinging my hand like some brute. I really am. But I had to make sure if your mother was being sincere or not.”

I spoke in a low voice.

“If I did not properly make this fact clear, then I thought that in the end, you’d be the one to be hurt. At the price of becoming the bad guy, I wanted to guarantee your safety. I will vow on this, I did not have any ulterior motive.”

“This one knows, but that is not the problem.”

Lapis Lazuli shook her head.

“There is no reason to apologize for hitting this one. This one is a peasant. Just being by your highness Dantalian’s side this one is able to bask in an undeserved privilege. The real problem is something else.”

“What do you mean by the real problem……?”

“Does your highness not know?”

This type of questions drove me mad.

The other person had the answer but I did not. If that was so, then I should have the right to at least know the question, but for some reason the other person held back both the answer and the question. Was this not excessively unfair?

“Lala. I do not wish to have a debate with you.”

“It is not a debate.”

Lapis Lazuli bowed her head.

“It is a simple test.”

And then Lala left the room.

Without asking for my permission to be excused.

I suddenly found myself alone in the room and blankly stared at the empty space in front of me. It was then that a half-transparent notice window appeared.

[Lapis Lazuli’s affection went down by 1.]

For a long time I stared vacantly at the notice. Because there was no one else in the room to hear my words, I muttered weakly towards the empty air.

“…… What was the problem?”

The sound of birds chirping could be heard through the window.

Ο

Ο

Ο

▯Weakest Demon Lord, Rank 71st, Dantalian

Empire Calendar: Year 1505, Month 9, Day 20

Niflheim, Hermes’ Plaza

“What was the problem?”

Barbatos looked as if she was at a loss for words.

It was the kind of face that looked as if she wanted me to bite my tongue and commit suicide.

“You tried to kill your lover’s mom!”

Hm.

“……So what?”

“Oh Goddess Persephone. Good God. Why you haven’t taken away this idiotic wuss yet is beyond me.”

Barbatos covered her forehead with her hand.

“Dantalian. Do you want me to tell you really, really honestly?”

“A truthful answer would be much better than a hypocritical answer.”

“Before hearing your story, I sincerely advised you to break up with your succubus lover, right? But now it’s really vague. You retard. If you’re going to be slapped by an outcast, then you deserved to have been slapped hundreds and thousands of times.”

“Oi. What would you have done then?”

I lowered the ice pack.

The cheek that was slapped by Lala was still hot.

“There’s a girl that you really love. But this girl, disregarding her own volition, was born into this world purely because of her parent’s mistake. As soon as she had left the womb she was immediately branded as an ‘outcast’. Even now, Barbatos, you disregard her as well.”

Barbatos creased her brows.

“I don’t ignore people based on social status. I differentiate them.”

“You mean discriminate. Anyways, that’s fine. In brief, the main culprit to make Lapis Lazuli’s life turn into a gutter was that old hag. What was I supposed to do? What would you have done?”

The people who I despised the most was the group of individuals that had a child irresponsibly. My father had done so, and so had my mother.

Normal people couldn’t understand how frustrating it was for a child whose life was already ruined at the age of 10. However, compared to Lala, my life could be considered as a blessing. Her life was crumpled up like a piece of aluminum foil since the age of 1.

“I can’t forgive that old woman. Forgiving her would be wrong. Damn it. I shouldn’t have worried about what Lapis had in mind and just killed that woman then and there.”

“Dantalian……”

With a sound effect a hologram displayed in front of me.

[The other party is disappointed in you.]

[Demon Lord Barbatos’ affection went down by 3.]

“You’re quite the twisted guy, aren’t you.”

Barbatos gave me a look of sympathy.

“You look perfectly fine but the inside of your skull is defective. You don’t even realize that you look like a mental patient right now, do you?”

“I’m perfectly normal.”

“There are two types of people who claim that they are perfectly normal. One is a murderer, and the other is a soon to be murderer.”

Barbatos lowered her back slightly.

She stared at me very seriously.

“Anyone will make mistakes as they live their life. Of course, if they make a mistake then they should be punished. Up to that point is fine. But you’re stating that the punishment must be execution no matter what. And at your lover’s birth mother, at that.”

“If there is a whore who deserves to die, then they should.”

Barbatos let out a sigh.

“…… Did you say your lover’s name was Lapis Lazuli? Damn she’s admirable. How the hell was she able to deal with you? If it were me, I’d have cut your balls off and ran away long time ago. You two really should just break up.”

“Are you taking my side right now or Lala’s?”

“I don’t know, you idiot.”

Barbatos scratched her head.

“I was hoping that an actual useful rookie had appeared after such a long time, but isn’t he just a complete mental patient? Haaa, my fate is always like this…… If you take out his love affairs then he sort of seems okay, but how the hell do I make this retard function like an actual person……”

“Hello? I can hear everything you’re saying.”

“Of course you did since I wanted you to hear it. Mr. Bitch, I’m thinking in a present progressive form on whether if I should appoint myself to be your nanny. This is quite the deep shit.”

Barbatos clutched her forehead and groaned.

It was like she was contemplating on how deep she was planning to step into someone else’s life.

If you become concerned with another person’s personal problem then you’d most likely end up in an endless swamp. Barbatos was probably thinking about that sticky feeling.

I wonder if she had finally made a decision.

“……Okay. Keep talking.”

Barbatos had an expression that appeared as if she had resigned herself to a knot somewhere in her mind.

“Keep talking? About what?”

“You dumbass. I’m talking about your love business. From what you’ve told me up till now, it doesn’t seem like there’s a huge problem between you and your succubus lover yet. You may have quarreled but that wasn’t a big enough fight to result in a break up. Just what kind of shit did you pull during the rest of the month that made that kid so appalled at you?”

“I see you’re talking in a tone as if you’re already certain that I’m the one at fault.”

“Yeah. I’m certain. If you think it’s unfair then prove your innocence, tsk……”

Barbatos gazed out the window.

It was still mid-day so the outside was bright.

As if she was estimating the weight of the sunlight, Barbatos narrowed her eyes. The sunlight polished her calves and slid down them.

Honestly speaking, it was charming.

Even the sunlight would be pleased by the fact that it had kissed Barbatos’ leg. There was no doubt that it’d at least be happier than falling onto my head. If it weren’t for her childish figure, then I may have even fallen for her.

“……Oi. Where are you looking at?”

Barbatos was glaring this way as if she was looking at something rotten.

I responded honestly.

“I was admiring your leg.”

“It’s not free so if you want to admire them then pay up.”

“You can just look at my leg instead.”

“Say that after you shave all your leg hair.”

I shrugged.

“I obtained information.”

Barbatos tilted her head.

“What information?”

“A small letter. There was no name and no sender written on it. Only two sentences were written on it with a quill pen. The content was quite memorable.”

I took out a piece of paper from my pocket and passed it over.

You have an enemy.10 days from now, an army of 2,000 men will invade your Demon Lord castle.

“Hmm.”

Barbatos let out a noise from her nose.

“A straight up threat is written here, huh.”

“I see it more as a warning than a threat.”

“Why? Even at glance it looks like a bluff.”

“Look at the lines carefully, Barbatos. It may only be two sentences but many contexts implications are hidden within them. First, ‘You have an enemy’ is written here. This is subtly hinting that ‘I am not your enemy’.”

This was too mild to be treated as a threat letter.

That was why when I had received this message a month ago, Lala and I had contemplated about it.

Who, with what intention, would have sent this kind of letter.

“Looking at the writing style, the personage who had written this letter is of the upperclass and has received professional education. By the way the words are slightly tilted, you can judge the person is either right-handed or ambidextrous.”

“…… You can tell all that?”

“This is all nothing more than assumptions.”

I leaned back into the chair.

I continued talking in a comfortable position.

“There’s also a high chance that the person is engaged in business at the top.”

Barbatos creased her brows.

“Haa? Why the top?”

“If you have eyes then look at the number.”

10 days from now, an army of 2,000 men will invade your Demon Lord castle.

“There’s a comma between the 2 and 0. That’s why there’s a high chance that the person is working in a high position.”

“……”

Barbatos still had a confused face.

It seemed that this violent child of a Demon Lord was not good at turning her head in this kind of places. I let out a sigh and kindly explained it for her.

“Normal people don’t put a comma when writing numbers in the thousands. They usually write it as 2000 without any special symbol. But the person to have written this letter had habitually added a comma.”

Thus meaning, a person who normally worked with a large amount of money.

A person who would always put a comma whenever three 0’s were besides each other.

A person who interacted with large numbers like 1,000,000 on a day-to-day basis.

“There’s no doubt that this person deals with either accounting documents or ledgers frequently. This person could be a grand chamberlain for a territory, or they could be a merchant that works in a high position.”

“Is that so……”

Barbatos made a wry face as she looked down at the letter.

“Your brain really isn’t there for nothing.”

“Don’t be moved already. There’s still 5 hidden truths in this letter. But if I were explain each and every one of them then I’d die of boredom, so I’ll skip them.”

Since olden times, secrets were similar to sex.

When taking off your partner’s clothes you had to carefully remove a single layer at a time. What enjoyment could you possibly get for ripping their clothes off all at once?

Everything was at its highest point of beauty when half-stripped. Like a woman who was only half revealed would be more charming than a fully nude woman, secrets had the best taste when only stripped here and there and then cooked.

C’est si bon.

“This guy is a completely perverted bastard, isn’t he?”

After listening to my esthetics, Barbatos’ face distorted.

“Anyways, you’re saying that there’s a high possibility that the culprit is a merchant, right?”

“Mm. At least from the outside.”

I scratched my forehead.

“Thankfully, I have a deep friendship with merchants. If, perhaps, the person to have sent this letter really was a merchant and was merely playing a prank, then it would be more than easy to catch the culprit.”

“Hm? How?”

I smiled smoothly.

“I told you. Merchants are my friends.”