Chapter 8 (2/2)
I remembered once hearing something like, “If you don’t want your wife and kids to end up homeless, you’ll listen to what I say.” Several times, I’d wished I could punch that division chief from my company in the face.
(Ah, rather than a punch, now it would have to be a fireball.)
“Hey, hey, wait a minute.”
I got up from my seat, and walked towards the dandy noble.
“You’re being too hard on her, how about you stop?”
(Ah, I’m so cool. I’m a hero of justice! That coercive yet kind phrasing was perfect, too.)
“I don’t know if you’re a noble or what, grabbing a woman like that is something that even those orcs could do. Are nobles a bunch of barbarians worse than orcs, huh?”
“What, you, you bastard!”
He drew a sword. Apparently his pride was high.
“Let go of her, and try using your words if you want to invite her somewhere. If you don’t know human language, I might be generous enough to teach you. Your legs seem to work, so you could probably manage.”
“You, who the hell do you think I am?”
“I. Don’t. Care.”
(The mood of the other people here seems weird. Eh, don’t worry about it.)
The noble’s face was redder with anger than if he was drunk.
“If you continue, my Super Fireball will burn your bones until only ash remains. But I’m kind, so the explosion will kill you before you can realize you’re dead.”
“Pa-chin.”
For the sake of appearances, I snapped my fingers. At the same time, balls of flame appeared around the man, each about the size of a volleyball.
They spewed puffs of flame, and I could feel the air temperature rising. One of the puffs of flame burnt a little bit of the noble’s hair.
“Killing you would be easier than finishing my drink. If I snap my fingers again, your existence will completely disappear from the world.”
I couldn’t help smiling at how cool I was. Meanwhile, a magic formation had appeared at my feet at some point.
(Ah yes, the special effects are important too!)
“If you want to challenge the Noble Magician Fouren, then go ahead and try! You think I’ll be defeated by 10 or 20 fireballs? Fool!”
He started glowing slightly.
(Magic nobles? I didn’t know about that.)
“Then say your prayers. Sayonara.”
I snapped my fingers again.
I almost shot them like I had with the orcs, but at the last moment I remembered that the explosion from that would probably destroy the tavern.
Instead, one of the fireballs lightly touched his back.
“Gyaaa?! AAAAAAAaaaaAAaaaa!!”
He screamed, jumped forwards, and fell on his face. Then he started convulsing and foaming at the mouth.
His back was pitch-black, and part of it was missing. There was a strong smell like meat left on a grill until it burned.
“…seriously?!”
(Oh shit, I should have held back here!)
Sophia-chan started screaming.
(It’s going to be bad for me if this guy dies! I just bought a house, I can’t leave!)
In a panic, I started using my recovery magic.
“HEALIIIIING!”
As I shouted, a magic formation appeared under the fallen noble.
His flesh and bones gradually appeared, and then his skin.
(There’s still a hole in his clothes, but expecting clothes to get fixed would be unreasonable. Eh, don’t worry about that, he’s rich, he can get new clothes.)
“Ooohhhh, amazing, he’s healing!”
“No way, those kinds of wounds…”
“I thought he was dead!”
“What kind of level is that?!”
“That’s how it looks inside a person??”
“We should get out of here.”
“Wow, amazing!”
The rest of the customers were watching as he was healed.
Finally, his consciousness returned.
“…..????”
He jumped to his feet in a panic. Feeling his back with his hand, he became increasingly confused as he realized his wound was gone.
His lips shaking, he shouted uncertainly, “Y-y-you bastard, I, I’ll remember this?!”
He started running off before he’d finished shouting. He looked like he’d seen a ghost. His face reminded me of a college student that had tried growing weed out of curiosity and got reported to the police the next day.
Nobody there spoke.
(I beat off the bad guy and saved the girl! What could be better than that?)
It was the first time in my life that I’d completely rejected someone like that. It felt good.
“Hah, too weak.”
I sat back down at my seat, and then I finished my drink, which helped with how my throat had gotten sore from that.
I was feeling good.
(Now if Sophia-chan just comes to say thanks, I won’t need anything else. Ah, come on over, I’m waiting.)
My heart was thumping with the suspense as I waited for her.
Instead, it was a middle-aged man I didn’t know who came over to me.
“Sir, I, I’m sorry, but we’re closing now today…”
“Eh?”
(Hey, nobody asked for you.)
“Could you go ahead and pay the bill?”
“No, um, I wanted to stay a little longer.”
“We really appreciate you saving our girl, but we need to prepare for tomorrow, so please, please, just leave.”
Looking around, the rest of the customers were leaving in a hurry.
(They really are closing up.)
“Um, I, I understand.”
(What the hell? Damn it. I wanted a hug from Sophia-chan.)
“Well, I’ll be going, then.”
“Thank you very much.”
I dropped a silver coin on the counter for payment, and left.
(I didn’t get to touch Sophia-chan. But still, I have a house! An excellent, amazing, sturdy house.)
I returned home from the tavern, and lying down on my fluffy bed was bliss. I was pleasantly drunk, and the room seemed to be swaying a little bit. It was kind of fun.
(Acting without worrying about the consequences is exhilarating! So much stress had built up over the years and years of holding back and fitting into society.)
“Ahhh, it’s good, this…”
I stared at the unfamiliar ceiling and muttered to myself.
That’s when the attack came.
“Get ooouuuut.”
A voice came from somewhere.
At the same time, an icicle appeared over my head, and shot down, piercing the pillow beside my head. The icicle was about 30 cm long, and drill-shaped. While that happened, my sheets suddenly became ice-cold.
(If that hit me in the face, I definitely would have died!)
“Guh, seriously?!”
(Is this the revenge of that magic noble?)
I got up in the bed. In front of me, a transparent human was floating in the center of the room.
“Get oooouut.”
More icicles appeared, floating around it.
“I won’t lose to you!”
In a panic, I summoned fireballs around me, two fireballs for each icicle.
“Hey, wait!”
The ghost seemed to be panicking.
“You’ll burn the house! Don’t use fire here!”
“That’s true!”
(This is my home! A fire here is no joke!)
I started putting out the fireballs.
“You, are you an idiot?! You burned the wall there, didn’t you? What have you done?!”
“Nooo, my house! It’s burnt!”
Indeed, part of a wall was blackened from a nearby fireball.
“It’s my house! Not yours!”
“It’s mine! My home! I bought it!”
(What is this thing? Is it an actual ghost?)
It looked like a human girl, about 140 cm tall and 13 years old, with golden hair and blue eyes. But it was transparent enough to see the wall behind it. It also had pointed ears, like an elf. It had pale skin and was wearing a grey robe, and was pointing some sort of cane at me.
“Who are you, barging into someone’s house like this?”
“I’m the owner! You’re the one who’s barging into someone’s house.”
“No, that’s wrong. I did all the paperwork and legally bought this house. If you’re going to try and claim it with force, then I’ll fight you with all my strength.”
“…bring it on. Let’s fight to the death.”
“Fine by me.”
(As a Japanese person, my house is of absolute importance! As a Japanese man, a house has been my goal since I was born! Getting in my way now is unforgivable!)
“Then you can die!”
(I need something other than fire magic! Skill window, come on!)
passive:
magic recovery: Lv.Max
magic efficiency: Lv.Max
language skill: Lv.1
active:
recovery magic: Lv.Max
fire magic: Lv.3
remaining skill points: 5
My level had gone up from defeating the orcs, and I hadn’t used the skill points yet.
(Something to destroy the enemy of my home is a worthy use of these!)
I mentally recited the muryoujukyou sutra, while the ghost summoned more and more icicles.
(There!)
passive:
magic recovery: Lv.Max
magic efficiency: Lv.Max
language skill: Lv.1
active:
recovery magic: Lv.Max
fire magic: Lv.3
purification magic: Lv.5
remaining skill points: 0
(Perfect!)
“Get out of my HOUUUUUSE!”
(This is my house. I live here.)
(Everything else is unnecessary.)
(Erase everything.)
“Guh?!”
A magic formation the size of the entire house appeared over the floor.
She started to say something, but that turned into a groan and she grabbed her head with her hands in pain. At the same time, the icicles went “pa-kin pa-kin” as they shattered into tiny fragments that disappeared.
“Gah, serioushly? I’m disappearing! Auuuu!”
“Then GET OUT! This is MY HOUSE!”
She flew outside through a solid glass window.
“Haaaa, good riddance.”
I collapsed onto the bed and fell asleep, with the room spinning as I closed my eyes.