Chapter 282: Changing Fate? (2/2)

I suppose it was all a dream, everything…

I sit over my bed as I begin to ponder.

Maybe this dream made me realize how much I didn't appreciate this life.

I missed it so much back then…

Maybe I should get my shit together and… work on myself a little bit.

Perhaps I shouldn't be so shy… Maybe I should try to be a better person too.

Maybe I should try to work out and… find someone…

Or…

Suddenly, a glimpse of those dreams emerged inside of my mind.

A beautiful, blue-skinned girl was in there.

Benladann.

Was… she just a dream?

Wait… she doesn't exist…

It was just a dream… The one I loved so much…

It was just my… imagination?

I feel like my body is about to explode.

The person… the most important person in my life in such a dream… It was just a fabric of my own imagination.

This… This is so painful…

So she was never real…

I rest over the bed, as I begin to cry.

But if she was a dream… Why do I love her so much?

This love hasn't gone away at all!

This… can't possibly be a dream.

Maybe there is really another world, and I just didn't dream about it.

Maybe in that other world, I really am an Ice Dragon.

Right?

No, no, no…

I am just going schizophrenic at this point.

…

I ended sleeping that night and dreamed of nothing I can remember.

The other day I woke up to find everyone in the house. Mom and dad were back with my brother too.

That day, we went the three of us to enjoy a night out.

It was a bit strange. I have never done such a thing before… but it was fun nonetheless.

It is interesting to know the other facet of my siblings which they only show at such parties.

It was fun to see my sister get all funny when she got drunk, while my brother gets overly emotional, crying for anything… seeing such a burly guy crying like that was certainly something else.

That night I was introduced to a few friends of my sister. I tried, but I really couldn't connect with any of them.

I just couldn't really do it… my heart was still thinking of Benladann.

I still think she's real…

Somewhere… I know she could exist.

…

Right?

That night I drove back home and carried my two drunk siblings to their room.

And then I went to sleep thinking about that dream.

I wish I could dream about it…

…

And I didn't.

No matter how hard I try, my dreams feel like they don't exist, it is just an instant I go to sleep and in the other, I am awake.

How frustrating…

Benladann…

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