Vol 5 Chapter 5 (1/2)

Other people determine your value

Other people also determine other peoples' values

1

I ended up using the stairs to the ground floor I walked out to the hallway of the fourth floor once, but the elevator was stopped at the ground floor, and even in my excited state, I was able to reason that it would be faster to simply run down the stairs Not that I was in any excited state I was so calrees

I fell down the stairs two, three ti But I was able to i off without a scratch, but it did not hurt otten sos can control their nervous syste of which, when life fore -- for example, when half their head has been crushed, or when they have been split in half at the torso, in such cases -- I have heard that their nervous systeets cut off They only have a few minutes left to live no matter what happens, so their body decides it is useless to send signals warning of i doom That made me feel much more pleased It is a nasty story, but it made me feel very pleased There is no value to pain to those who do not fear death With just one decision, life for away one decision, life forms can becoht that as I picked myself up off the wall after my fourth slip

It did not hurt nor itch to tu -- which I was grateful about, but it was problematic that I could not walk properly It felt like round I felt extreravity field Speaking of which, a long tio -- before I participated in the ER3 Systeisa Tomo, we talked about that Whether by the time we became adults people would be able to travel to space with ease They o? Not really Not interested How about you, Kunagisa-kun? I want to go M a hikiko What's distasteful? A pathetic life form I'm not pathetic Maybe But space is pathetic There is nothing worth anything in this world, anyways There is nothing worth anything anywhere Nowhere? Nowhere Even if you go to space, if you look at Earth, you just think, ”it's blue” That is all you think by going to space, you know? If you want to see that, you can just look at a picture book Not just blue, but red, black, green, everything is there Going to space is just a roundabout way of confirnificant you are The extreme result of romanticism It would be better to just look at your hair then Eheheh Stop laughing for no reason like that Disturbing I hate that about you I love that you say stuff like that Oh shut up

”-- stop trying to flirt”

A truly pitiful brat I thought that myself So conceited, so conceited, so conceited So ecstatic, so ecstatic, so ecstatic Andjust the surface of the world, or perhaps seeing just the back of the world In any case, just looking at one side of things Feeling wise after having a lihten a hollow self cru The hollow self had becohs nor tears And the farce has not yet come to an end It continues, forever Forever, frozen In other words, I have not grown one bit since being gripped by Dead Blue I have not accos to be accomplished

Fifth turound floor It seemed this time I hit , but ain I had a flashback First,sister Father Mother Uncle and aunt on both sides Mele friend I did not know of any No one know ofPlane My little sister disappears around then Good bye Kasu else disappeared Was this also a revolving lantern? I do not know theKokoro with The few class with sensei And then a lot happened I could not reme out japan Kyoto Reunion with Kunagisa Toisa as before The same myself as before Asano Miiko-san Suzunashi+ Neon-san Pateren-san and the run-away siblings What happened to her after she left for Tokyo Wet Crow's Feather Island The style-less artist The decapitated Fool The unstable cook The unpleasant fortune-teller He, the sa Lady and the triplet maids I want to see theest contractor May Meeting them And contact with the human failure Pointless conversations Conversations without self-love The worst witch, Nanananairl who calls ht up to Hime-chan, I snapped back to reality What the hell, I mumbled I mumbled, consciously I remember a lot Jeez, my memory is not completely useless after all Really, jeez I pickedknife that had clattered away froround, and slid it into the keyhole on the doorknob And then after shaking a bit, the lock easily clicked I gripped the knob I still could not feel anything Given how , there did not seem to be any broken bones It was a careless conclusion, but I decided to believe that, and opened the door

Di Just a luminescent bulb that seemed like it would cut out any moment, in the basement of the fourth ward that I stepped out into As soon as I walked out, I heard voices froone nu so much, but it was a needless worry I perked my ears

”--- I ------------- so -----”

This voice -- who? It was terrible , and there was no break between the words Kasugai-san Kasugai-san is here Where? Ahead Of course, by the cages ahead

”-- if that boy has gone somewhere it means I am at fault That would cause me some trouble That's why I must ask you Understand?”

Kasugai-san's voice Calry I carefully, keepinginaudible, one step at a tiressed down the hallway I was suddenly beset by a headache I may have hurt my brain a bit with one of my tumbles Not that it matters Not that it matters for a brain that was broken from the start Not that it matters, so please, wait a bit Just wait a little bitI need to do

That hen I alhing for the first ti I need to do Me! For of all peoplelike that Even a child who has abandoned every sense of obligation and every right can end up with so like that! Then, perhaps in the end I did not si Perhaps, to this point, I had simply acted as if I did not notice It was probably the latter In other words, that means that even more than I had ever realized, and even iant fool

In the end, however, I did not laugh

”Who knows?”

A nostalgic voice I had only been gone for a few hours, but Suzunashi+-san's voice sounded nostalgic to my ears

”Maybe he went hory at this treatantly, despite how he looks, so er”

”-- I aai-san's voice reer or sadness or hesitation or anything ”How could he have left And if he left you must have all seen him leave How did that boy escape? Perhaps that means there is an insider here”

Strange, I could hear soai-san's voice Like so Nor Suzunashi+-san Then who? Kunagisa? I felt like s My whole body As if the sense of pain I had sealed aas just co back

”Now that you mention it”

Woah

”Boku-sama-chan saw Ii-chan dislocated all of his joints and slid out through that crack Ii-chan's so cool, you never knohat he's going to do”

I was freed frorowling continued along with Kunagisa's words What is it? Is there someone else? No, I did not sense another While my inward senses were numbed, my outward senses were amplified a hundred, two hundred tiai-san is the only one in front of that cage

I tried to think Is there any good idea that I can use? I used about two seconds to think, and then I quickly shook , and yet I was unable to co, so I could not think there any point in trying to think now Then there is no need to think My body auto, will move, I hope Will move, I pray

I turned the corner, and began stepping out toward the voice Yes, if I turn the corner, I will be by the cage with Kunagisa and Suzunashi+-san--

”----”

And then There was Kasugai-san In a white lab coat She looked atThe dog that was playing withBlack and big and vicious Like last night, there was no chain, nor even a collar Why had she taken a dog to this floor I did not knohat Kasugai-san wanted That hy I naturally returned ai-san She looked a bit startled, but without showing that inner expression, she simply said, ”-- my”

”Why did you--”

”Ah, Ii-chan!” Kunagisa clasped the bars of the cage with an out-of-place happy voice ”Yahoo! Ii-chan! Welcome back!”

I could not respond to that voice I sinore her and glanced at Kunagisa in the cage She looked well At the very least, it did not look like she had been harmed any It seemed I had made it Probably, had made it Suzunashi+-san was there too Calainst the wall But she looked at me, said ”jeez,” and then, ” so,” she continued quietly

”Inoji By how you look, it doesn't look like you're all ready”

”Ah You're right Ii-chan, you're pretty hurt Your skin's peeled all over And bleeding You okay?”

What Suzunashi+-san isa did not seem to care about that all, and instead worried about isa never worries about herself Why I did not know

I took out the lock-picking knife, and with unstable footing ( I e Huh The key is open Why? Perhaps Kasugai-san had opened it I looked at Kasugai-san

”Hey -- I'd rather you not do anything Don't move”

She said so I cannot hear Maybe my eardrums had burst after all I can hear but I do not understand what she is saying I understand what she is saying but I do not knohat it means It was like easy-to-hear French Oh well There is nothing to be gained froai-san's voice I opened the door of the cage

”Lets go home, Tomo”

”What? Ah, yup--”

Kunagisa hesitated How rare Huh Did I say soether Like always Go soether That is all Ahh, right, I need to buy uirō on the way home For Hime-chan's friend Miiko-san will probably want some too, so six or seven bars

Soai-san

”-- please go inside like that I'll try not to treat you badly”

”Shut up or I'll kill you”

I turned around and shook Kasugai-san's hand off

”Please don't get inhome now”

”I won't let you”

Kasugai-san did not back down, and pushed me with one are Away froo back But I was obstructed By Kasugai-san -- and one dog

And then I realized The black dog by Kasugai-san's feet was not froht Looks the same, but feels totally different Not even just like a wild beast It was precisely a wild beast As if glaring, as if staring at the face of an archenes postured, prepared to lunge at any s just a bit, as if prepared against any attack Coht were like domesticated puppies They wore the same skin, but this was a completely differently life form

”The last -- of the triplet”

”Precisely”

Kasugai-san looked down just a bit at the dog

”Of course this is nothing like the two you ht and is not nearly as docile That is the result of experimentation, you know”

The result of experimentation? What sort of experimentation enes to this degree? I felt like sheyesterday I also felt that she did not say anything I cannot re What isWhat she

”What -- are you thinking,” I asked Kasugai-san ”Bringing such a wild dog along -- this is no longer a joke”

”It's your fault for escaping If only you stayed put,” Kasugai-san casually answered, without any hesitation or conflict ”Now hurry up and enter the cage please I would rather not do so like this either But if you won't, I will That's all”

Ordinary

Kasugai-san's way of speaking was far too ordinary

In this extraordinary place

In this extraordinary situation

It was this, ordinary

”-- I see I get it I get it, you are like that, too”

I finally understood

what Neo-san ai-san Finally, in this situation, I comprehended

I see, I see so that is how it is What itother than that she can do anything She has no restrictions She has no obligations And thus she has no boundaries That is the the identity of this Kasugai Kasuga Reason or theory, theory or conclusions, nothing has any

She chose nothing herself, she decided nothing herself, and that resulted in this She binds other people without care, imprisons them, and hurts them And that was not for any conviction of hers Because she has none

Professor Kyouichirou acts for his own research Kokorooals, and revolts for those goals shi+to-kun and Misachi-san assisted the professor for their own sense of loyalty, and because of that sense of loyalty, easily crumbled

But Kasugai-san is different

She has no reason Noher, forever If I had to describe it as anything, she is si her If I were to have arrived late, and she were to have set the dog free inside the cage, she would not be any different Even if that were to ultiisa, she would not be any different She has no goals norThere is no placating or converting or threatening

There is no conviction

As Neo-san said, that is indeed terrifying

However

”That would mean she is just like me--”

I stuck my hand in my left breast pocket, and pulled out the knife The lock-picking knife in my left hand, and the thin blade I received froai-san with this setup She did not look at me with any sort of surprise, and without any sort of emotion

”I do not think there is any point in less resistance”

”Meaningless?”

”There is nowhatsoever The Professor and the other researchers will be here soon What will you do by breaking through ”

”It is not nothing at all,” I took a step closer There was less than twothe pistol at this range There was Kouta-san's warning, but I was also not foolish enough to use it without any practice Even if this action of h you, and then break through the Professor, and the other researchers That is my plan”

”You're insane”

Are you seriously one to talk?

Before I could retort, Kasugai-san had snapped her fingers And then the black dog twisted itself in nal As you would expect of Kasugai-san, a biologist However, it was not an entirely unexpected or entirely a surprise -- so without losing ht foot about three steps' length The black dog stopped in front of her, as if it meant to protect her ”As your senior, I shall warn you that if it bites you, it's over I can hold him back for now -- or should I say muzzle him? Either way, I can restrain him for now”

I ignored Kasugai-san and faced the black dog Kunagisa and Suzunashi+-san said nothing They were not in ht, so I could not see their expression Or perhaps they were saying so, but I could not hear them at the least

Ahh -- perhaps I have gone mad

To not even be able to hear Kunagisa's voice

”I feel truly pleased truly truly truly truly truly truly truly truly truly truly truly truly truly truly truly truly truly”

I threay the lock-picking knife Clang, the dry sound echoed down the hallway The black dog responded a bit to that sound, but it did not lunge I stood no chance with both hands occupied against a dog like this One blade is enough

”I see -- I see You're serious I'ly, truly just a bit, but truly nonetheless, disappointed ”I thought you and I could get along”

”I only thought that just now, Kasugai Kasuga-san”

”-- break it”

That was the signal The black dog unleashed its pent-up ed toward ai-san to protect her It was showing that it wanted to destroy me I had completely iven that I nonchalantly and ignorantly chatted with Kasugai-san There was not, but my body moved anyways Faster than I could think, it quickly moved

Even I thought it was abnor black dog To be more precise, I threw a full-body punch with so ht wonder if I wanted to take out its jaw into its opened s of a dog are simply a means of movement and serve no other purpose As a predatory aniai-san herself let slip, only its teeth That means it is easy to predict its path, and if you can predict its path, it is likewise easy to seal it away And then, tragically, the habit of dogs is to not let go once it has clamped its jaws shut Especially if its teeth have sunk into its target

Well, that would be about it if I were to logically explain, but it was not like I was thinking anything of the sort Simply put, the opponent opened its mouth, so I shot my arm in

However, despite that pree allback It appears there is a fundath of hu ended up pinning ht there were two, and yet it was still less strenuous Having succeeded in tackling s And then it clamped down harder with its jaw locked over my left arm

The black dog continued to clenched its teeth with ns of wanting to let go Well of course, it bit h the jacket, and I had even twisted it around its mouth It would not be able to pull its teeth out very easily Not that this was a particularly good situation for me If it cannot pull its teeth out, it simply needs to bite my arm off Of course, I have a clu would have trouble just biting off my arm Still, it would be able to crush the bones of th for that I could tell by its front legs pressing down on me My nerves went haywire from the pain, and I could not resist I could not think properly, and I was left screa for the opponent to move -- well, normally that would be ould happen

But I do not currently feel any pain

I feel nothing even having been tackled and havingI just thought it was a shaain be unusable I swungthe knife, up NoYou were the one that sunk your teeth so deep Regardless of the what, you need to take responsibility for things of your doing Is that not right?

Seriously

We are both in such crappy positions

I stabbed the knife deep into the left eye of the black dog, into that large, black eyeball There was almost no resistance as it crushed the socket, and I think it reached the brain of the black dog It did not screae, it sank its teeth into -since been destroyed, and it felt like its teeth were penetratingto say that it would crushthe brain does not cause a life forer will it take for this thing to die? How long willwill h destruction Still not enough destruction Gotta destroy Destroy Destroy destroy destroy Destroy more and more This most miserable Too miserable life Too th, I used my muscles, and lifted by upper body

”-- GAAAAAAAAAAAH!”

I re-gripped the knife with ht hand, and then drew a line fro the torque of ed the knife forward, andalong with its teeth -- abruptly backward, pulling it asunder, and with twice the power of one ar cut, the sound of blood vessels being ripped, the sound of skin being torn Echoed Perhaps , because that sound unpleasantly, yet somehow pleasantly, echoed

Once I had dragged the knife halfway through the black torso, I pulled it out with a tre Onspurted out The black insides The insides, like darkness was flowing forth

Sparkling

”-- ha ah----”

Crumpled

My body toppled over I did not mean to topple over but it did Like a battery that had run dry Required recharging However My body no longerits insides Heavy Terribly heavy My eyelids were heavy Sleepy Wanted to sleep Wanted to go to sleep Not yet Not yet Nothing has ended yet

Clap Clap clap

The sound of applause

”-- aai-san said ”Perhaps I should call it-- but I think it'san eye That's pretty hard -- you know Ahh but I' aside the idiots that don't know the value of lives though alright? To comprehend what it means to take a life and to still be able to take a life is a A fool not ”

”It is a great honor to be praised by you,” I answered, panting Was I able to enunciate properly? I do not know ”-- so Please step aside and let us through You don't want to die too, do you?”

”You're right I think I don't want to die after having been able to meet someone like you But I can't really just stand here and look unaffected after having et killed and listen”

Kasugai-sanin on so And the reason for that was revealed the nexton this floor, that was the sound that I heard Elevator It was on the ground floor when I checked when I was on the fourth floor That the elevator that used to be on the ground floor has arrived on the ground floor means that it is on the back end of a round trip And that it went on a round trip meant that someone was on it

That so

”Time's up -- you know”

I could sense a bit of syh perhaps I washer I raised e I could not see Suzunashi+-san Where did she go? Did she go soisa

At isa Tomo

Huh Why? Why are yousuch a tearful face? You are not supposed to be able to hing innocently Always s athappily In enjoyisa-kun That face of yours, I have only seen it

A single time

Once

only

The sound of soled my neck to look in that direction It was not one person There were many At the front was Professor Shadou Kyouichirou Behind that was Neo Furuara-san Koutari Hinayoshi+-san Huh And behind that was none other than Oogaki shi+to-kun And to his side was Uze Misachi-san Wow They already woke up Then Kasugai-sanMaybe it was bad to have left shi+to-kun next to the entrance Though I was not sure And behind the tas Miyoshi+ Kokoroai-san is already here, that athered

Maybe it is over

I thought

It is over

I understood

”In the end--”

Kasugai-san said

”-- what did you want?”

It was a question

A terribly knowing, a terrible precise, and probably, in the entire world, only Kasugai-san could ask me that simply, clear question

”-- Love”

I mumbled

I did not answer, but I mumbled

”I wanted, love--”

It was a pleasant feeling I wanted to laugh Really, wanted to laugh

I used ht hand to raise ht then Let le My relentlessness is my sales point My blood-covered body My bloodied usting But I also felt like this was all I could do I looked at the knife As expected of a knife given directly by est contractor Despite all that destruction, it did not have a single nick Maybe this would be easy

To rip my neck off

I looked at Kunagisa

As expected, Kunagisa looked like she was about to cry She was clutching at the cage, andBut she was still unable to cry It was a painful expression that crossed crying with laughing Right Just as I cannot laugh, she cannot cry Just like me, she cannot cry She does not kno to ly expression And that was terribly disappointing I wanted to see Kunagisa's innocent, naturally pure smile in the end

Ahh, but

That

Would be seeking the moon

I realized my left arm was heavy

The black dog, which had already scattered its life sos stuck in i's corpse The brain destroyed by having a scissors plunged into his eyes, his s ii Gaisuke It seems subconsciously I had performed the exact same actions as that crime suspect How terribly ironic Then in truth, perhaps I was the suspect

Well, none of that really matters at this point Whether the action happened is not a problenition is there That was all The footsteps came closer My eyes were clouded over a bit so I could not tell how far they were But I was truly out of time I kept hold of the knife as I putIt was a little hard toit dangling like this forever I felt bad for it, so I decided to rip it off Yet strangely it was so stuck that it did not come off easily No, this is not stuck, but rather its teeth are lodged in too deep And it stiffened Yes, in other words, a cadaveric spasm A cadaveric spasm, the result of a violent death I had just talked about it with sensei a couple hours ago, but I could not iine then that I would see it like this

”-- huh--”

And, as I was about to destroy thewith the knife, when I had slid the knife into the gap, this time I froze I had to freeze

Did I just say cadaveric spasm? Did I say that?

”-- you! What're you doing!”

shi+to-kun's voice echoed around the hallway However, that wasbeen frozen My eardrum did not even vibrate Wait a second Think Think Calht there Reach out With your arht there Just a little bit more

In other words is that hoas?

I did not notice o of the knife It fell

Utsurigi Gaisuke If If that was the type of hui Gaisuke Malignant Bacteria Green Green Green Cluster Cracker The reality that you would not iisa Tomo For just that reason, the man that was obedient toward Professor Kyouichirou The once and forisa Tomo

Crucifixion

It that was just pri

If that was not a

”Hey, you! You! Are you listening?”

Thump, someone pushed me Probably shi+to-kun That body of round becaain It hurt My sense of pain was rejuvenating It see back online My whole body hurt Especially my arm Of course Probably half my muscle had been ripped into I will not complain I did take the opponent's life, after all

Belatedly, I felt bad for it

However, it was not particularly wrong

You were not wrong