446 For the F*cking World (2/2)
The accommodation was good. This building was furnished well and they lacked nothing. They had meat for every meal and had more than enough bread. However, they were still being 'protected.'
The Revolutionaries seemed to still be distrustful of Constantine whom they had rescued. Even after countless rounds of investigation, they still didn't tell him the Revolutionaries' new location in the Sacred City. As his secretary and follower, Charles naturally had to go through investigations too.
The Winter Festival was getting closer every day. There was only half a month left but he still made no progress. Constantine and Gaius only communicated with a few letters. Because Constantine had vision problems, Charles had to read the letters out loud for him. However, they never talked about anything important. They probably knew that communicating through letters could not solve any problems. Constantine had always been against Gaius's actions in the Sacred City, even if the man had saved him from prison.
On the other hand, Gaius's attitude grew colder and colder. In the last letter, there was a feeling of 'you're on your own now' with a bad premonition.
Thinking of this, Gaius sighed. His expression grew troubled. The bedroom door behind him opened.
”Charles?” Constantine took off his glasses and looked over. ”You haven't slept yet?”
”I woke up and couldn't fall back asleep. I opened the window to get a breath of air.” He asked, ”Did I wake you up?”
”As you age, you become a lighter sleeper.” Constantine tossed a book onto the table. ”I read for a while but still couldn't fall asleep. I realized you weren't sleeping either so I came to ask if you want to drink.”
”Sure.” Charles shut the window and grabbed a bottle from the cabinet. He prepared everything. There was an ice tray in the kitchen. After pouring in clean water, Charles shook it slightly and there was the sound of ice forming.
”All set?” Glancing at his relaxed actions, Constantine looked a bit envious. ”No matter how many times I see it, I still think musicians are quite useful.”
”I'm not even a musician. This is just a small trick.” Charles smiled helplessly. ”When I was little, my teacher would use this trick to play with me. After I grew up, I realized that the biggest use for this is to make shaved ice for myself.”
”Then, let's drink to the powerful musicians.” Constantine raised his glass and they drank bottoms up. They talked about many different topics. Talking with Constantine was interesting. One always had a good time.
After a few glasses, Charles grew happy. He wanted to talk about the happy days of getting drunk in Avalon and running around nude. But then he shuddered. He had a different identity now. If he got drunk and ran out of habit… It was one thing to get mistaken as a pervert but it was also cold out. He could catch a cold from running nude!
His mind instantly cleared.
”Mr. Constantine.” After hesitating, he could not help but ask, ”What is…the general like?”
”The general?” Constantine thought for a while and laughed. ”You mean Gaius?”
”Yeah.” Charles nodded and explained, ”Uh, didn't you say we'll go meet the general in a few days? You know me. I want to get some facts straight so I don't say the wrong thing.”
Seeming to understand something, Constantine chuckled. ”You're scared I won't take you?”
Charles scratched his head awkwardly.
”It's not that much of a secret, actually. Everyone has already witnessed Gaius's actions,” Constantine said lightly. ”However, most people just think he's crazy. I do too.”
Charles froze. He did not expect to get this comment from Constantine. He had thought that after interacting for a decade, Gaius and Constantine had mutual trust and worked together well. He did not expect that in Constantine's eyes, the Revolutionaries' general that caused so many sleepless nights, the worst criminal in the world, was just a crazy man.
”Perhaps Gaius was once the most clear-headed man in the world.” Constantine laughed and downed a glass. ”But how much sanity could remain after he was forced onto a hopeless path time and time again by the thing he believed in strongly?”
Charles looked at him in confusion.
”You know he's a Romulusian, right? A descendant of demons.” Constantine pointed at his chest. ”He was born with two hearts. One left, one right. The Romulusians believed that only those destined to be heroes would have that.
”From then on, he became an apprentice of the elder. That was the start of his path to betrayal. The wandering nation desperately needed a guide. He believed that too. But when he realized that no matter what he did within, he could still not save Romulus, he betrayed everyone's expectations.
”He left Auschwitz for the Sacred City and never returned until Auschwitz became a pile of rubble.”
Here, Constantine fell into silence. After a long pause, he murmured, ”His entire life, he worked to complete his destiny but in the end, he was abandoned by his destiny. In the beginning, he wanted to save his brethren. Later, he betrayed his brethren. Even later, when he believed strongly in the Sacred City's radiance, he witnessed Ye Lanzhou's death and was utterly disappointed.
”He wanted to save the human world but realized that the human world was rejecting his salvation… Now, Gaius wants to rebuild order and create a better era. Sadly, the era does not seem to love him.”
Constantine could not help but laugh. His smile was full of mockery. ”He is a contradicting ironic man. Charles, does this disappoint you?”
After a while, Charles shook his head. ”Sir, he sounds like a pitiful man.”
”Pitiful?” Taken aback, Constantine quickly burst into laughter. ”Perhaps. Because of these pitiful men, the world will never have peace.”
Looking at him, Charles asked tentatively, ”Then, you…can't advise him to stop?”
”Charles, did you know that a sense of mission is the gift from the demon?” Constantine drank with his head lowered and said, ”It is wrapped up nicely to disguise its horrible nature. So many people go crazy for it, even willing to die for it.
”If it cannot be satisfied, it will cause insomnia, making one feel hellish torment. Even if you die, you won't be able to rest in peace.
”All these years, so many have died because of Gaius, sacrificed for him. If he stops, then all those sacrifices would be in vain. Do you understand? Those deaths have become a curse, turning the sense of mission into a demon entangled in his life. He can't stop even if I'm blocking him.”
Charles fell silent.
Seeing his sadness, Constantine roughly ruffled his hair. ”There are so many people in the world. It's not your place to be sad for him. Come, Charles. Let's drink to him.” He stuffed a glass into Charles's hand and raised it. ”For Gaius, for the revolution, for the f*cking world, cheers!”
Throwing his head back, Constantine downed the glass and collapsed into the chair. He had finished the entire bottle of hard liquor. He lay on the sofa, intoxicated. As if seeing something, he smiled and quietly recited something in a foreign tongue.
”Inde genus durum sumus, experiensque laborum; Et documenta damus quâ simus origine nati…”
Therefore we are a hard race and inured to labors and we give evidence of the origin from which we are born.