Chapter 164 (1/2)
Volume 2
Chapter 143
In a few days after Yuuto came for a visit, I was finally released from the cage named hospital.
「Thank you for everything.」
「No, I am relieved that we were able to peacefully discharge you.」
Since it was a workday, no one came for me. Only doctor Maeda and a nurse were there to see me off.
Mai was in the belief that『It would be a pity if Brother were to get lost and started crying』and wanted to come, but I don’t think that going as far as to skip school just to pick me up is a good thing for her.
That is why I endured jabs like『I am worried that lazy brother will oversleep and trouble hospital personnel』or『Are you planning to pretend that you forgot something so you can leer at women in nurse attire?』or『Brother is a pervert, lecher, uniform fetishist, I cannot bear the shame of having such a lewd brother』and similar verbal abuse… And endured…but I couldn’t endure it for long.
I mean It’s just not possible, I never felt that I can win against that stare head-on.
On top of that, she is getting subtly better with her poisonous tongue, for example, I almost didn’t her last lines at all. I heard that she is saying something, but I completely shut myself out from the outer world. Sob sob.
Rather, it’s almost a miracle that I was able to make her attend school during my hospitalization at least.
Therefore, instead of leaving the hospital in the afternoon as I was originally supposed to do, I shifted it to an earlier time.
If I contact Mai after already reaching home, surely she wouldn’t skip school. Later, she certainly will sulk a lot, but if I make an offering of apple jelly, she will forgive most of the things.
「It surely will be hectic, but take care of yourself.」
「Yes, thank you for your consideration.」
Wearing casual clothes that Mai brought for me, I put the bag with all my other belongings over my shoulder.
After bowing deeply, I turned away from the hospital and began to walk.
The weather was really good and clear blue sky was just as grand as my resolve.
I thought about a lot of things and found a lot of them disheartening, but I could easily discard all of my concerns as they didn’t matter at all.
Because there was something more important than my worries, something that I had to protect.
「Well then, let’s begin from returning to ordinary life.」
There was a gap of more than one year between my own perception and the world around me.
Things that changed, things that did not, things that I understood and those I did not.
I have to adjust that as soon as possible and return to the ordinary days from my memories.
Staying by Mai’s side and protecting her.
So I won’t lose what is important to me, so I won’t let go of it.
I don’t have time to spare for anything else, I don’t want to repeat the mistake of not being able to protect…
Repeat, repeat…?
『Say, where we made a mistake…』
『If it is in my power, I will do anything. I will even give you half of the world. So come to my side, please.』
「…?!」
Glaring sunlight, so bright that it’s almost painful, makes me dizzy.
In front of my eyes flashed an image of someone with a hidden face and red hair.
However, when I, with an intense headache, reached my hand out for that illusion, it disappeared into the blinding light.
「…I’m getting used to this.」
Struggling. That me that I lost is undoubtedly struggling inside.
…Somehow I understand that with my senses. I can feel how that me is trying to get to the surface.
For Yuuto, Mai, and my own sake as well, I have to regain my memories but I just could not bring myself to like this sensation.
No, it’s not even that I don’t like it, I am scared of it.
The voice screaming inside me is filled with such anguish and rage that I have to ask myself if it’s really my own.
With logic, I understand that I have to recall it. The past me urges me to recall it but somewhere deep inside, I am frightened.
Is that really me? what kind of cruelty happened? The uneasiness that I should have shaken off shows itself there.
「However, this one right now felt a bit different…」
It was different from usual when only hatred and anger are transmitted.
Just now it was filled with tenderness and love, but in the end, it, after all, turned into melancholy.
「Damn, really, just what I’ve been doing?」
A bit embarrassed by that lingering feeling of affection, I scratch my head as if to gloss over my own feelings.
Or rather, if I get a sad feeling over the sight of the woman does that mean that I got heartbroken during that period for which I am missing memories?
「〜〜〜——, Stop stop stop!! Aah, shit, this is just the worst.」
Treading over a dry asphalt, I halt for a moment and shake my head.
「Oh, what might be the worst?」
「? …, Ah, you are… Eeh, ehmm」
「Eh? What is this reaction, could it be that you had forgotten about me? It’s me, me, Kawakami Kumiko!!! Reporter from the『Monthly・Utopia』!」
The one that approached me was a mature looking woman in the cardigan and with well-arranged hair. However, there was such a huge gap between that appearance and the panicking demeanor when she was rustling through her bag, trying to pull out the magazine that I could not bring myself to say anything.
Previously, I heard from mother that a woman can transform with well-applied makeup and a proper hairstyle but this is harsh.
「A, Aaah Aaah, yea, yes, Kawakami-san, it’s okay, I remember, I do.」
「…You should try to learn how to lie better. If it’s this obvious, it’s not just infuriating, it awakens an urge to kill.」