Chapter 161 (2/2)

I am rather surprised at her sudden switch to such a cooperative tone.

Ignoring my confusion, Kawakami-san stopped a taxi and opened the door.

Then pushed notepad and pen to me.

「In exchange, tell me how I can contact you. In this case, you will have a talk with me?」

The sweet smile on her face gave off the pressure that would not allow any objections.

Besides, it wasn’t such a bad deal for me as well. After hesitating for a bit, I wrote down my cellphone number and home address and handed notebook back to her.

「Yes and here’s the money, absolutely return them. Okay? I will come to collect them later, then l will hear your story. Come on, you are in a hurry, right? 」

With those words, she got me in the taxi and handed me some money and a business card from her wallet.

「…Thank you very much.」

「I don’t need your gratitude, just give me a story that will bring me money.」

Waving her hand dismissively, she closed the door.

「Where would you like to go?」

I gave the address to the driver.

Shaken by the vibration of the moving car, I turn my eyes to the view outside the window.

If my memory is correct then it should not be that far if I were to travel by car.

After staring outside for just a little while, the view changed to familiar places.

Familiar, but unmistakably different from before.

My impatience grew.

Once again, I left Mai alone in that house.

（Yes, I should not leave her alone. I should not.）

Being alone is painful, truly painful, enough to make you lose all hope.

It feels almost like you are drowning and everyone around looks like a hateful enemy.

That is why in order not to see anything, I just kept on running and running and running.

Seeking a spot in that murky water, where I would be able to breathe…

「…? What, is this all about?」

Sharp pain pierces my head.

My mind that was gradually calming down, turned into turmoil over the strangeness of my thoughts.

What, just what’s wrong, this feeling makes no sense.

Yes, I am worried about Mai, but why am I rushing so much…

「Dear customer, we are approaching the set destination. 」

「Yes, Thank you. Here will be fine.」

Without getting my thoughts in order, I reached home.

A small house in the middle of a hill.

In the small yard were neatly lined up pots with herbs that mother raised with great care.

In the garage, standing without any signs of dust on it, was father’s cherished bike that used to be his hobby.

A house that just yesterday was so familiar, now looked very nostalgic.

Perhaps it is because I didn’t come here for more than a year, even if I lacked the memories of that time.

I did not expect that I will tear up looking at my own house, but at the moment, it’s all about Mai.

「……」

I unlock the door with a spare key that was under a flower pot and enter inside.

After I got inside the house and took off my shoes, my anxiety tuned down a bit.

Most likely, Mai was behind that door that was leaking light, down the corridor.

Still not sure how to start the conversation, I quietly opened the door and found Mai there.

「————……so I think, after all, he finally came back.」

The burning smell of incense filled the room and the portraits of needlessly cheerful parents propped onto an altar.

「Brother seems to remember nothing about the time he was missing. His unchanging bird braininess keeps astonishing me, yet I am actually relieved. I want Brother to be just the way he was before.」

With her back turned to me, Mai continued her monologue in front of the altar without noticing me.

「With wounds all over him, he was not waking up for so long that even though he just returned, I was worried that I will be left all by myself again. Good grief, my family is really cruel, even though I am this cute, where all of you went leaving me.」

Mai’s voice was trembling a bit, is she crying?

「I’ve had enough. All this time, I was so lonely. Please come back home already, both of you.」

Aah, no good, I can’t take it anymore.

「Mai!!」

「Hyaa?! W-Who…」

「Sorry, sorry for leaving you alone, for not being able to remember a thing.」

I tightly hug Mai from behind.

I did not care about my strange actions nor the unknown emotion mingling inside me. All of that did not matter anymore.

「Brother? Why?! This altar is not what you think, fa-father and mother are… Are… 」

「It’s fine, it’s fine… It is fine…」

Tightly, tightly, as if amending for something I have lost.

Tightly, so I won’t lose anything anymore.

「Sorry, I am sorry for being a pathetic and unreliable brother, I can only say sorry. 」

「…But even so, you came back, even so, you returned. When you get back home please take care of me like before, in return, I will help out around the house, again, like before…」

「Yes, I will stay by your side, I will… No matter what happens, I won’t just disappear again.」

Yes, I am not losing anything anymore.

I absolutely won’t lose a thing.

Yes, that is all, that is all I wish for…

「Again…」

「Bro… ther?」

A headache throbbed as emotions crawled out from the innermost of my heart.

A feeling like something from an empty void is trying to bind my body.

I am, I am…

「…………」

Without saying anything, I just hug Mai even stronger.

Ignoring a strange unquenchable flame burning inside me.

As if trying to cover up something that is about to gush out.

Pressed by an immense feeling of guilt from not being able to say that I am content with just this.