19 Decisions (1/2)

In the morning, father's reaction somewhat assuaged my guilt. His tangible excitement at my breakthrough was reassuring.

On the other hand, mother was worried. She shouted at father, telling him that he shouldn't have encouraged me to breakthrough.

It was difficult to tell whose attitude was right, because I truly valued both of their opinions. Father's reaction brought me a sense of fulfilment, whereas mother's had riddled me with justified doubt.

It was hard to deal with the feeling that cultivation was wrong. With the restrictions placed on it by the government and my family, I couldn't help but treat it like a controlled substance.

However, it was different from the things that were forbidden in my old world. Cultivation gave me power. It gave me to the ability to change things. Was that why the government controlled it?

I progressed with a new sense of responsibility. Starting from the first tiny drop of qi, I formed an army, and each droplet was a soldier.

After I broke through, the surface of my soul hardened. It became almost crystalline. My soul couldn't expand on its own anymore, so I had to try a new method.

I ordered my army of qi to charge against the walls of my soul. With this added pressure, my soul started growing again.

The down side of this new method was that it required a lot of concentration. I had 500 units in my qi army and controlling them all took a toll.

At first, I could only do it for a minute at a time. But over the months, my control improved. By age six, I could control them without breaking focus. By age seven, it became second nature to me.

By age eight, my qi army was almost 800 strong. The day that I could leave home was coming close. I asked father when it would be time, and he told me that I had a month left.

Now, I had to make a decision. Where would I go?

I remembered the large complex just outside of town. I had seen a lot of golden qi, similar to father's and mine, leaking out of the buildings. I decided to ask father about it.

Early the next morning I went to find him. This early in the morning, he was usually practicing out on the patio.

The sight of father's monstrous yet beautiful form left me awestruck every time. I waited for him to finish before speaking.

”Father, can I ask you something?”

He turned to me, sweat dripping from his brow, and his body shrank back to normal.

”You're up early! Sure, fire ahead.”

”What's the place with all the golden qi just outside of town.”

He walked back into the library and put on his robes.

”I thought you'd ask me about that sometime soon. Come on, let's go find your mother.”

I rarely had chats with both my parents together, and it was usually after I had done something wrong. Apprehension gnawed at my gut.

”Did I do something bad?”

Father laughed and shook his head.

”Don't worry, it's just important that your mother's here for this.”

We found her and sat down in the dining room. My parents sat across the table, facing me.

”Oscar,” mother started, ”we need to talk about where you want to go.”

”The place you asked me about is a Military School,” father continued, ”and it's one of the many options you can choose from. ”

”Remember sweetie, just because your father was a soldier, doesn't mean you have to enter the army.”

”What do people do in military school?” I asked.

”Well, you learn how to fight. Of course, they teach you other things but…”

”What do they teach you?” I interrupted.

”Military tactics, civilian control, road building… But honestly…” father leaned in closer, ”look. If you want to learn how to cultivate, your best bet is the military. With your qi type…”

”Carlo!” Mother interrupted with a shout.

”I'm just telling him the truth!” father responded defensively. ”Sure, he could enter an Ascetic Sect but…”

”Those people are just cultivation junkies! I can't believe you'd suggest that.”