Vol 1 Chapter 52 (1/2)

2 Sadness is also a very complicated matter

Legend says the carp wants to juon’s Gate He has to take off all his fish scales and cut off his fin before he can change into a dragon

Legend says the bird has to burn itself to death and bathe in fiery pain before it can change into a phoenix

Is it necessary go through the pain of ignorance during youth in order to obtain the wisdom of maturity?

[Idio a sudden rise in social status- often used to encourage students to obtain success through hard work and perseverance]

Ever since wang Zheng clearly said that he didn’t like Xiao Fei, she stopped going to the dance hall

She looked pretty hed loudly and shouted loudly as if she didn’t in the slightest bit reer was herself After she put on clothes and brushed her hair, she’d always ask ain as if whether or not she looked good was completely decided by others

She no longer rejected invitations froo out to play with thewith the notice of hiirl who liked to play the irls, she changed ‘boyfriends’ at the sa clothes If it was a boy as like this, irls would say, “Girls only love bad boys,” but towards Xiao Fei, they sparingly used the most vicious words to attack her behind her back with

I watched Xiao Fei’s change with detachh it pained me, but I had no other way because I knew that I was powerless to stop her, if I said too much, she would choose not to heed my words and instead stay away from me

I cold only treat her like a child going through their rebellious period and patiently stay by her side, hoping that her sad and confused days would pass by faster After her pain subsides, she’ll discover that wang Zheng’s negativeness doesn’t represent the negatives in life, whether or not she’s pretty comes from inside her heart and not from other people’s words

I tried my best to use our friendshi+p to influence her decisions by setting her friendshi+p circle within middle school students In my opinion, these people are still pure, if Xiao Fei played with theetic towards the them as Xiao Fei’s heartbreak cannon fodder

During that period of time, I lived very chaotically, one side was the beautiful world of love inside romance novels, the other side was cruel reality If say I couldn’t obtain the good graces of my dream prince, I could still understand but what about Xiao Fei? She was pretty, smart, friendly and kind but her prince wouldn’t even look at her once I started to wonder, is there really a kind of thing called love in this world? In this world, can a girl really hope for a guy to wholeheartedly cherish her, love her?

Wondering is wondering but I still enjoyed reading roently read them When I walked out of a dream, I’d walk into another dream In reality, life was too barren, only the dreams weaved from novels can add a little more color to life

In the pain and confusion of growing up, the first term of the second year ended Our end of tere but Xiao Fei only ranked forth in her class In the eyes of others, this was still a good grade but to Xiao Fei, this was the worst grade she’s had

Xiao Fei didn’t care at all, no only did she have no restraint, because it inter vacation, she coo and played She intentionally avoided places related toand also because she didn’t want me to care about her but how could I not care?

Once, she was drunk and had a drunken fit at someone else’s karaoke bar When I went to pick her up, she flung onto me and sobbed

She was extre I could only pat her back and continuously say, “It will pass, no pain can fight against tiet about him” But I couldn’t even be certain et the people we’ve liked before?

Just as I was about to hold Xiao Fei and leave, I heard a person cry in the corner of the bar The sound see Jun’s girlfriend Xiao Fei was sad because of wang Zheng, as she sad for?

I wanted to leave but seeing her drunk made me worried so I could only take her out too

With Xiao Fei like this, I didn’t dare to take her straight hoirlfriend lives so I could only call a taxi and go to Xiao Bo’s karaoke bar first

Wu Zei sent people out to find Zhang Jun to co tea

When Zhang Jun careeted hi you”

Wu Zei pointed at ood deed, it has nothing to do with me”

Zhang Jun looked at irlfriend and left I stared at his back and had a strong urge to throw the apple in my hand at him Wu Zei shi+vered, “Four Eyed Panda, since you despise Zhang Jun so irlfriend?”

I smiled sweetly, “Who said I despise him?” Then I stood up to look at Xiao Fei

Wu Zei shouted after me, “If you don’t despise him, why did you squeeze the apple like this?”

After Xiao Fei beca and watched her go up before I left I knew that touys usually were usually better at playing than studying and were skilled at s

Actually, in a sense, I was also considered brokenhearted, it’s just that I was cowardly and overcautious and hid everything inside so I didn’t even dare to reveal my sadness

I signed up for a holiday drawing class and started to draw seriously To be able to be assigned to the top class for his third year of high school, Xiao Bo started to pick up his textbook and revise schoolhile doing questions

Xiao Bo saw that I was struggling all day with a bunch of colors and couldn’t help but ask, “Why are you interested in drawing all of a sudden?”

I suddenly decided to tell hi, beautiful and intelligent, her grades are good, she kno to play the er hu, sing, write, the essays she writes are good, she can pretty ”

Xiao Bo didn’t understand, “What does this have to do with you drawing?”

“I inquired around for a long time and heard that she doesn’t kno to draw so I decided to learn to draw”

Xiao Bo turned stupefied then continued to laugh, “You actually envy soo and see how s she has”

I glared at hiuy who has seen her before like her, I don’t allow you to like her so you can’t see her”

Xiao Bo was astonished, “You really envy her?”

I nodded then said with an iemyself but now I understand that no matter whether or not you like yourself, you can only be you so I don’t hate myself anyirl On the surface, I look like I don’t care but actually, I’ve been secretly co hard but every time I feel like I’ve i, when I see her, I immediately realize that the distance between us is still so far I feel like in this lifetime, no matter how hard I try, I definitely won’t be able to chase up to her Even envying her is a joke because envy only suits people who don’t have such a big distance between the prettier than her but she definitely can’t go and envy Brigitte Lin for being prettier than her So, do you understand? Actually I don’t even have the right to envy her” I took a long and hard sigh, “I can only go and learn their weaknesses to secretly give !”

[Brigitte Lin is a Taiwanese actress]

Xiao Bo gently said, “You are you, an unique individual, there’s no need to compare with other people”

I didn’t say anything, I lowered my head to dilute my watercolors He wouldn’t understand that kind of envy, to envy so she has

On the third day of Lunar New Year, I went to pay Teacher Gao a new year’s call Teacher Gao lamented, “Last year there were still quite a few students who came, this year there are less than half Probably next year there will only be you and Zhang Jun”

She asked about hed s properly?”

I truthfully said, “Actually, I have lots of interest to the sciences strea earnestly, it’s just that I’ but as soon as I start playing, I don’t want to study How do those good students resist?”

Just as I was chatting to Teacher Gao, Zhang Jun ca a new year’s call was cohtwhereas he came with two hands full of presents, no wonder he was rich

Teacher Gao was very happy to see hiht time, Qi Qi is here too”

I stood up and said, “Teacher Gao, I o to er”

Teacher Gao was regretful, “Can’t you stay a while longer? The three of us haven’t chatted for a long time”

I apologetically said, “I ”

Zhang Jun stood on the side with an expression of indifference and didn’t say anything After saying “Goodbye” to Teacher Gao, I left her house

I walked sloithby, I attempted to analyse my heart

When Zhang Jun wasn’t there, I would keep thinking about hi and look forward to our chance encounter; but once he appears in front of me, I can’t wait to escape So do I want to meet him or not meet him?

How complicated is it!

I couldn’t analyse it so I

A person’s heart is too coht to a heart but drawing can be grasped with diligent practice

After New Year’s, everyone’s pockets had quite a lot of money and the temperature was hold thus everyone liked to cozy up and play inside so the karaoke bar’s business was boo

My New Year’scareers It was both painful and sweet, painful because I didn’t even have a dime left in my pockets, no matter what I saw I could only eye it covetously and sweet because looking at the rows of pens and paint gave me a sense of achievement

My little sister started learning the keyboard In that era, parents all want their children to learn so’s, few parents could afford violin and piano lessons so most chose to learn the keyboard that out of the whole class of girls, you can’t find ht the keyboard in their spare ti bucket loads

Little sister created noises in the house all day so Iequipes and pages of scrawls and felt that I was still studying hard and on the main path so they were very at ease with me and continued to use a carefree approach towards me

I was very happy they were using a loose approach onthese ‘bad youths’ like Wu Zei However, so lectured by dad for being too lazy to practice the piano and getting punished to not watch the television that night, et complicated as if I hoped my mom and dad would come lecture and punish me

A person’s heart ah, it is really complicated!

The eighth day of New Year’s, I sat in the sun on the balcony and held uppeople pass by as I pretended to practice sketching theirlfriend enter side by side

Not long later,the song ‘Like The Fog, Like The Rain And Like The Wind’ spread from one of the rooms

Tolike the rain and also like the wind