Vol 1 Chapter 23 (1/2)
3 Haven’t Even Dated, Already Out Of Love
I can lock my diary, yet I can’t lock my heart
I can lock my heart, yet I can’t lock love and sadness
I can lock love and sadness, but I can’t lock aze that follows you
Many years later, like a clear sky, I can soodbye
Whereas that year, those words I had no time to say, you will never know about them,
They have been locked and cast to the botto river of time
Under the reco store’s owner, I started wtih Qiong Yao’s books and plunged right into the world of romance novels In the Taiwanese romance novels of that period, it wasn’t popular to talk about how beautiful the female leads were, instead, the authors liked to describe how much class they had and how different they were fro so I often thought about what class was I secretly longed to have class and be like those female leads in roe faance and class to capture the male lead’s attention But the words “class” were too abstract When I observed the popular girls around me, I felt that perhaps the way they looked and dressed were different but they all had one similarity, they all truly looked really pretty I didn’t see any girl with ordinary looks who still had boys like her due to her a character like smile
When I reht, God placed the answer in front ofwith a blow I think that I’ve had an inferiority co, but the arrival of Teacher Gao causedJun’s friendshi+p tempted me to desire ements Why did Teacher Gao decide to chooseclasses with me? Why did he help me find stones? Why did he speak to me today? Why didn’t he ask his desk mate for an eraser, why did he borrow it from me? When he walked past my desk today, why did he look back at me? Why…
Through the countless ‘whys’, I analysed all the daily trivial nificance were analysed to becon, they were i to tell uely hoped for the fantasies incards to tell fortunes I calculated ood, I’d really happy; if it wasn’t good, I would reshuffle the cards, thinking that it was definitely because the cards weren’t shuffled well so the calculations weren’t accurate
Perhaps the answers to these countless ‘whys’ are very simple, when he walked past my desk and looked back at me, it was because I had ink on my face, he asked to borrow my eraser because his desk mate’s eraser had disappeared… However thethat was inon to my expectations
—
Just when , carefully hoping and carefully getting closer to hi
When she walked in the classrooracefully s, I finally understood the word “class” in the romance novels The teacher said that she was called Guan He, the person was truly similar to her name, a lotus flower
[The He in her name stands for lotus]
Later, I walked through many cities, I saw many countries, met lots of beauties, but every time I recalled the beauties, little Guan He would always be the first to pop into my mind
She wore a violet coat, and had a purple plastic butterfly hairpin clipped on her head Her raven black straight hair draped over her shoulders Her features weren’t prettier than the pretty girls in our class, but she had an aura about her that capturedthe unfamiliar class, she didn’t nervously try to hide, nor did she eagerly try to blend in She only stood there, sliracefully
In the days after, Guan He exhibited an inexplicable charot first in the class just on her first test; she was talented, in the New Year’s Day class party, she sang while playing the erhu to ‘Night on the Grassland’, causing the teachers and students to be greatly surprised; the blackboard bulletin she wrote turned around our class’ ehout the year [They are in class (1)]
However, she was never the slightest bit arrogant, unlike the other girls Her smiles were always kind, her voice arhty nor humble to the teachers, and she treated other students polite and ood student or a bad student, they all greatly adraceful demeanor
They say that friendshi+ps between girls are hard to keep The girls in our class are always proof of this, one moment they are really close and inseparable, the next, they’re saying bad things behind each other’s backs However, Guan He became the exception, not only did all the boys in the class like her, even all the girls in the class liked her, to the extent that if a girl said bad words about Guan He, the other girls would break off their friendshi+p with that girl Gradually, even the irls started to Guan He, whereas Guan He treated everyone the sa as her help was needed, she would definitely do it However, she also kept a distance from everyone and had no true ‘best friend’ But it was just this close yet distant attitude that ood to Guan He and become best friends with her, they even boasted that actually, they were even closer to her, as if the people ere in Guan He’s good graces were ranked one notch higher
I was dumbstruck as I watched the incredible Guan He conquer the hearts of all the boys and girls in our Year 6 Class (1) at lightning speed In all fairness, I also liked her as I believed that through the chatters of the gossip girls in our class, the bad things I’ve done would have all traveled to Guan He’s ears, yet she still treated me the same as the other students, not close yet not distant Once, when I spilled ink on rains of rice and gently rub it into the stain so that it will be easier to wash off
In this ‘craze’ that swept through the whole class, Zhang Jun was unable to excape I often saw hi to look for Guan He, I often saw him volunteer to help Guan He do her duties and I often saw hiether After carefully looking at Guan He then closely exa myself, I quietly shrank back into my shell
—
Once, after irl, what should he give her? What do you girls usually like?”
I stared at him blankly, the heart in ulate, yet it continued to beat, peng peng, peng peng, peng peng…the sound grew larger and larger, as if it was going to jump out of my chest However he wasn’t able to hear any of it He worriedly scratched his head and asked, “girls on television all like flowers, do you think giving flowers is good?”
I loweredmy books, I left a “i don’t know” then swiftly walked back to the class
Not long later, I heard that Zhang Jun confessed to Guan He and Guan He politely rejected hiirls in the class described it in vivid detail, it was as if they were there watching the whole thing Guan He was described as a graceful shereas Zhang Jun was said to have overestih he wasn’t as bad as a toad, but in the ranted
I had not the slightest interest, my heart was filled with sorrow I felt sorry for him and also felt sorry for myself In that period of tia about Guan He’s brilliance, I couldn’t help but feel a lump in my throat If she was the prettiest lotus flower in the lotus pond, then I was the little blade of grass that grew in the mud beside the pond, no matter how you compare, I didn’t have one aspect that was ebtter than her
Wu Zei was too used toa book in hand Nowadays, I unexpectedly didn’t read anymore, that even Wu Zei was a little unused to it He would ask ? Is it because you don’t have any money left? Do you want brother to support you?”
I ignored hi carelessly like usual but this tiht at the center of s of love? Has the Four Eyed Panda fallen out of love?”
I grabbed a bright, but what I thought was the start ofvacation was already over
[SheVacation’ at the end of the Chapter 2 Part 1]
—
Tonight, the drizzle of rain swirled outside theUnder the light, gently flipping through the classet, have becoo, was placed between the pages
Tonight, the drizzle of rain swirled outside the , exactly the same as that year aved and parted The rain are all singing the same tune, the one we didn’t understand that year Hurriedly, too hurriedly
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There were many primary schools in the city Our school only had 5 spaces for co in the hts abouttwo of the spaces For the sake of lettingJun join the competition, Teacher Gao carried a lot of pressure, she was prettyus to try our best, the co an aasn’t i out of it
Who would let their friends die!
[Proverb: A true gentleman will sacrifice his life for a friend who understands him]
I didn’ta bad student and didn’t care whatsoever about thatTeacher Gao down I was evenothers to hurt Teacher Gao due tothat I would only be able to repay Teacher Gao’s kindness through getting an award
A ether with a boy who I liked, yet who didn’t like et to know each other well and try to open up as much as possible
Not long ago, this was the sweetest thing to ritted my teeth and tried hard to clearly listen to every word he spoke, telling myself that I must win that award!
Everyday, I studied like crazy and gave up everything else in ht of the ht, when I closed ht of the maths competition In that period, I couldn’t even dream peacefully, if my dreams weren’t of the o Jun and Guan He In , whereas I was like trash and didn’t usually appear
On one hand, I was putting in all my efforts whereas on the other hand, I had no confidence in et an award and I dreaht that I failed and the entire world laughed at Teacher Gao and I I often woke up seized with terror To ratitude and it was a way to certify et an award My pressure was hard to iine for outsiders
One day, I felt that I wasn’t able to go on any after the store and Xiao Bo was playing gah school entrance exam and clearly wasn’t relaxed either
Wu Zei laughed, “you two are sure like siblings, when you don’t come, you both don’t come, when you come, you both come”
I said to Wu Zei, “give ht now so I’ll buy it on credit”
Wu Zei was duot a bottle of beer, pried open the cap and handed it to ulps Xiao Bo called ames with me”
I walked over with the beer He askedtoI vent it all out by fiercely pounding the buttons, every time I killed a monster and saw the blood spurt out in the screen, I felt a littlea round,at any minute, relaxed Xiao Bo took the rest of ulp, he asked ?”
I watched the ga screen as I said out htmares that I’ll fail my test”
“Dreams are opposites”