Vol 1 Chapter 21 (1/2)
Chapter 2: Confused Feelings
Goodbye darkness, hello sunshi+ne! Luo Qi Qi is finally opening herself up and living the happy, carefree life that children her age should be living
Sometimes, when you feel like you’ve become isolated and have sunken into darkness, your friends will be there pulling you out It’s at these points when you realize how much they impact you and how important friends really are
I’ll be on seht be the last post until then!
1 Fate Is Reversed
Within tied Each of us within the limits of the sky, the corners of the sea
Beyond ti, as we sit side by side on the peach blossom covered classroom steps
Chen Jin and I were originally two parallel lines with no chance of intersecting, but because he chosepartner, our fates crossed
Although our reasons were different, we both didn’t listen in class However, he was a good student and could only stare off into space expressionlessly whereas I, the bad student, could choose between staring off into space, sleep and read novelsAt the time, I was currently lost without hope in the worlds inside books Chen Jin would occasionally glance over with the corner of his eye, probably bewildered by enceAfterwards, e beca When he heard the titles ‘Xue Rengui’s Can to the West’, ‘Folk Literature’…etc, he looked like he was going to collapse because he had never heard of they’ name When he heard ‘Dreahtly back to nor don’t watch Red Chadoms’, your dad allows you to watch ‘Dreams of the Red Chamber’?”
It wasso I dazedly said “I don’t know,as the book is on the book shelf, I’ll read it”
He thought for awith me “lend me your copy of ‘Dreams of the Red Chamber’ and I’ll lend a set of books to you”
I brought ‘Dreams of the Red Chaave s/Odes, the oldest existing collection of Chinese poetry] He finished ‘Dreams of the Red Chamber’ really quickly and returned it to h ‘Xue Ren Gui’s Caave it back toit Thereafter, it was alwayshis books, he had completely no interest in my books
The ‘Classic of Poetry’ he lent me had no vernacular or explanatory notes so it was very laborious reading There were many parts that I didn’t understand but he would never explain only telling me that poetry didn’t need explanations for every word, you only needed to remember it and one day, one moment, under a certain situation, it will naturally come to you I didn’t know if his father told hi to bother explaining
Because reading it was very hard work and boring, I didn’t want to read it But Chen Jin, in his boring prodigy life, found a new hobby which was to test me He would often randomly say a line and wanted me to say the next line; or he would recite one half and I would say the next half If I got it correct, he would have an uncaring, taken for granted expression However, if I couldn’t say it, he would shake his head disdainfully at ies so under the incentive of this garadually memorized the entire of ‘Classic of Poetry’
At the start, I was only an aradually, he realized that I wasn’t like the other students and teachers, who ad with or without a purpose
People who’ve hadsessions should all have the experience of having a piece of writing that you have to ive us twenty or thirty iven time, whoever memorized it first can raise their hand and recite it for the whole class, the shorter the tilory
Chen Jin never bothered joining in these because his , he could recite all the texts in our Chinese book Once, he half jokingly flaunted toover the middle school Chinese book, I can recite it for you” So when the teacher wanted us to memorize the texts, he was very bored
However, having me who didn’t listen to the teacher as a desk ave me a photocopied article from some unknown book and wanted to compete with me to see who could memorize this text in the shortest time
The articles he gavethan our Chinese book, I was probably greedy and also probably co sessions, the two of us were busy The result of the competitions were always certain Often, after I worked hard looking at a few parts, he would already tell me that he was able to recite it I wasn’t able to understand how he could finish reading a text so fast so I asked
Chen Jin didn’t answer lance
“My dad said that there are only two physical things in the world that boundless, one is a person’s brain, the second is the universe Only if you believe” he pointed at my head “use heart to train it, it will be able to do it”
I secretly remembered his words When I read novels, I started to force myself to look over two lines at once, then two to three lines, then three to four lines… This process was very painful but through ambition, no matter how painful, I still forced my brain to function to the limits
Unconsciously,abilities i to occasionally winning the cos difficult for Chen Jin, he would pretend to be calm and indifferent but secretly he would frown and look at me
The first ter to a close, one day at self study, Chen Jin suddenly said toto class tomorrow”
I thought that he was sick or so work so I could only quietly make a soundHe pulled my homework book over and motioned for me to move my head closer He held a pen and carefreely wrote on the exercise paper, as if helping me with a question: “rade My dad didn’t agree A few days ago, rades Last week, I went to Yi Zhong to do ot full marks on the middle school second year ot 80 percent After reed for me to start Year 1 of Middle School next term My mum wants me to quit school and use this period of time to read over the course(No1) is considered as the best high school inabout the best middle school There are 3 years of middle school]
“You’re saying that you won’t come to class anymore?”
“Yeah, I’ doesn’t know yet,to school tomorrow to talk directly with the principal”
Everyone envied skipping grades but Chen Jin’s tone of voice seemed unhappy Afterall, he started school early and now as he was skipping two grades, he was going to be four years smaller than everyone else The difference of four years is very big to a child 34 year old people perhaps wouldn’t think that people that are 30 are very different to them but a 14 year old middle school student will definitely think that a 10 year old primary year 3 student is not from the same world as them
After school, he carried his bad and stood on the podiu at the classance on his face, only the reservedness of a person skipping grades When it was tioodbye tohiround As he walked, he looked around as if he was reluctant to leave I lifted upafter hiether”
His eyes lighted up but his face still had an expression of nonchalance, as if this sort of thing was coht until ere at the street where we had to part He waved his hand at oodbye” Then he ran off I waved at his back and continued walking Every one of us are like a planet Our starting point in birth and our finishi+ng point is death, this is what the heavens have planned for us long ago However, our orbit between birth and death depends on many factors As we move in the vast universe, the first two planets we bump into are parents, then, there are teachers, friends, lovers, superiors…
Meeting and colliding with other planets will inevitably i of our orbit So so a harsh boss, these probably all count as typical negativean appreciative boss, having friends who are willing to give a hand, fengshui study often call these types people of high rank Actually these highly ranked people are counted as typical positive encounters
Chen Jin was the first person to create a significantly positive i desk ht h I was only standing at the door, but due to his pointers, I had unintentionally embarked on this path
However, the me at the tihtclass, the poetry he tested s he recommended s were only little children’s gas that weren’t any s But in reality, the things he brought me subtly influenced my life’sobt
Chen Jin’s sudden departure created a wild effect in our class For that period of ti, it was honestly a group breakup
Afterwards, soirls in the class were all very happy They started to save ether to buy a ift for Chen Jin I didn’t join My family wasn’t rich and my pocketjuice
But the probleh my fairls who caive all that they had In the eyes of the girls, ain became our class’s special case, the whole class knew that I didn’t like Chen Jin Inside the hearts of the girls in our class, thethis sentence was: you, actually dare to not like Chen Jin?! Because of Chen Jin, I suffered froirls in the class all seemed to see me as an enemy
Thebut nohen I think about it, I feel that these feelings are so pure and sihtest bit of desire, to the extent that everyone can beco the same one But this type of like can only be experienced in the primary years
Not long after Chen Jin left, the first terirls were going to buy as a present to Chen Jin as in their eyes, I had no right to like Chen Jin with the the present to Chen Jin’s house during winter vacation so for a very long time after term 2 started, their conversations were always on Chen Jin How beautiful Chen Jin’s mother was, hoise his father was, how noble their fa Chen Jin was
—
After Term 2 started, I, this little planet, encountered another planet which created an enormous impact to me
Due to health reasons, Teacher Zhang wasn’t able to lead the class this terraduated from Teacher’s Technical School, Teacher Gao Perhaps due to just graduating, she had an unli class, she would crack jokes at as and sing songs If someone was distracted, she would even pretend to be pitiful as say to us, “I knowhard to estions but you can’t not listen”
Teacher Gao really liked to sood students differently from the bad students I even felt that she was more biased towards the bad students, when she talked to us, she would always be warmer and more patient as if she was afraid that she would hurt us
Because of Teacher Gao, I stopped being conflicted about doing my homework but my basics were too bad so even if I did the hoic to look at However, I noticed that Teacher Gao would carefully mark every question and write a detailed explanation of how to tackle the question on the side There werewhere she would write praises, coht process It wasa student even though their ansrong
Every lesson, she would ask me a question If I answered correctly, she would praise me enthusiastically If I wasn’t able to answer, she would smile and say “think about it carefully, this question is within your capability of answering” and then let me sit down
In the eyes of adults, children seemed to to be iht I’ve already felt all Teacher Gao’s small acts of kindness I a I have yearned for the light for too long but just as I started believing that this world is filled with darkness, that in the the eyes of the adults, I was sole attribute, that it wasn’t possible for any adults to bestow me a little warmth and care, Teacher Gao appeared
She looked at , hesitating whether or not I should trust her good intentions Inbut rather, I turned even worse During her classes, I intentionally read books, didn’t listen and wrote wrong answers to o towards the east; she said east I’d go towards the west I wanted to force out her ‘true face’
Even to this day, I still don’t understand what the uess that I orking hard to prove that there was no light in ive up hope There is no disappoint another way to protect myself
However, Teacher Gao never had her ‘true face’ forced out She used the heart of a parent e their children to tolerate my actions
In midst of these, a situation occurred which completely removed any suspicions I had towards her The school wanted Teacher Gao to understand our class better so during Teacher Zhang’s resting period after her surgery, the school specially arranged for them to meet, to let her explain every student’s conditions
I was always the last to find out so when I heard about this, Teacher Zhang was already sitting in Teacher Gao’s office My feelings at the tiuishi+ng the small flames in my heart Teacher Gao’s office was on the first floor I happened to be there also so I secretly sneaked under herto listen I was late so I didn’t hear what Teacher Zhang said exactly, only hearing Teacher Gao saying very politely to Teacher Zhang, “……Everyone iven Luo Qi Qi and Zhang Jun are very smart students…”
I couldn’t hear the rest of her words, I could only feelFrom the day I started school, there hasn’t been anyone who called me smart I was associated with dullness and stupidity Ifor sure! When erly wanted to listen again, I could only hear the sound of Teacher Gao sending Teacher Zhang out Thus, I walked back to the classroo ”
I secretly told , that it was true, I wasn’t stupid But , refused to accept it and continued to repeatedly tell
However, noor not, I had decided to hold on to the light in Teacher Gao’s eyes I was too scared to let her down, scared that after she was disappointed, she would shi+ft her sights Therefore, I stopped reading books in class and started to concentrate on the lesson After class, I would seriously think and complete every question for homework Even if I wasn’t able to do it, I would still write hts in the corner I wanted to let her feel ive me some time
My rades went fro Jun was also like this However, our Chinese rades still weren’t good
Even so, hted After my father attended parent teacher interviews, he excitedly said to me, “After the parent teacher interview ended, Teacher Gao asked hter Luo Qi Qi is very smart’ Oh yeah, Teacher Gao also wants to choose you to participate in the city’s prio to school for lessons in the summer holidays”
In thatthat time
Participating alongsideJun