Chapter 1257 - I’ll Regret the Rest of My Life If I Lost You (2/2)

“Mm.” Tang Mo’er nodded.

“Elder Sis…” He sighed.

“Yeming,” Tang Mo’er said as she interrupted him, “My body is fine now. I’ll be leaving with Mr Gu tomorrow to the Capital. I miss Niuniu and I want to give birth to this baby.”

She wanted to leave?

Lu Yeming’s smile slowly faded as his hands balled into fists before he released them again. She was the warmth he held in the palm of his hands.

As long as he still had her, he would never feel alone in this world. She may be loved by many people, but she was the only one he loved. He was already used to how much they depended on each other. She had always been with him even in childhood.

No one could replace her.

For as long as he could remember, she was already an integral part of his life.

“Goodbye, Yeming.”

Tang Mo’er wanted to shut the door.

But the hand she placed on the doorknob suddenly warmed as his large palms covered hers, stopping her from closing the door.

The sudden touch made Tang Mo’er freeze before she quickly flung his hand away.

She wanted to shut the door.

But a long leg jammed itself into the gap her door left and his deep voice rang out, “Elder Sis, I didn’t do anything wrong, did I?”

It was as though someone had suddenly reached into her chest and was squeezing her heart. Her heart hurt so much.

He was her little brother.

“Yeming, the love you feel for me isn’t that of a man and woman, do you understand?”

Lu Yeming looked at her and slowly smiled. “When I was still in school, I heard that love between a man and a woman was something that made your heart race. The year you turned 18, there was no one else in our world yet. I remember Grandma made you wear a long dress brought in at the waist. Grandma was praising you, saying that her Mo’er was now a young lady, with curves everywhere. You were grabbing at Grandma in embarrassment then, speaking gently and laughing uncontrollably. I remember standing outside the door, not daring to take a look at you.

“You smiled at me often, and I’m not sure when it happened but I started not being able to look at your bright, smiling eyes. My heart was racing as I avoided your gaze, looked at your shadow and smiled secretly.

“I was ignorant as a kid and fell deep into love with you. After so many years, I’ve never had another woman by my side. And who doesn’t have desires? The first time I relieved myself, the only person I could think of was you. I was wracked with guilt at that time and was covered in a cold sweat.

“I’ve never dared to have any hope of being with you, neither have I dreamt of coveting or disrespecting you. Restraining myself has become a habit. I’ve hidden this love carefully all these years so as not to trouble you. I’ve never hurt anyone as well. I just want to stay by your side, to have your company forever.

“You have your Mr Gu, and I will eventually marry as well, have a child, and become a good husband and father. Maybe one day, after many years of setting down, I will finally love another woman. But no matter how much time passes, they’ll never replace you.

“If you ask me to define my love for you, it is like the love of a mother, the love for a young lady. It is the love of family, the love of lovers. I’ve given all my love to you and it’s mixed into my blood.

“No one is able to repeat their life, so no one will ever accompany me over my first 20 years, just like you did. No one would ever make my young heart race like that ever again, make me love so much, yet not dare to take a single step forward.

“I have every right to love whoever I want to. Who has the right to tell me who I can love? But why do I feel so much pain? Why can’t I be accepted? Why does it hurt so much?”

Lu Yeming’s deep eyes turned red as he exposed his very soul to her. She stood inside as he stood outside, a door separating them. She was so close he could smell her hair.

“I know that the memories I hold will bury me for the rest of my life. No matter how good the rest of my life is, I will always regret losing you.”