22 Charade With the Pas (1/2)
”The inability to face the past is the same inane failure of not being able to see what's ahead.”
-Conceit
━━━━━━━━┓ ✠ ┏━━━━━━━━
I can still clearly recall, the myriad of events that likely led me to this situation. My older brother, the heir of the Cendrillon aristocracy killed my family that night. He plummeted to his mad selfish ambitions and to the deepest pit of dementia itself. Precedent, with the skill set he learned from his various experiences and his tier-one educators, I could tell that he had no difficulty and whatsoever on killing them, even going against swordsmen of great renown. The moment I seemed to annoy him, he tried to kill me with a gun at point-blank range. I was helpless. Lost. Sad. Alone.
This is where the deity, out of nowhere, made her quite elegant entrance whilst completely delaying the flow of time. She claimed to be Lacrimosa, the Goddess of Disambiguation. She handed this weird contract that I knew nothing of, which I read frivolously, even skipping the terms and conditions that could have explained every bit of the bizarre that bombards me to no end these days. The goddess, then made me sign the contract and along with it, a wish of mine was granted, to nullify every bit of emotions that overwhelmed me greatly that moonlit night. In exchange, she said, she'll be taking my freedom.
That day, I became what she called the 'Monochrome' in her empty canvas and I also remembered opaquely as to how he referred to me as a 'Herrscher', but to this day, I never knew what it means to be 'that' really. I just continued living life the same, except I am partly emotionless. I can't feel fear, sadness, and anger. I was then taken care of by my financially-conservative grandma and a cascade of years later was enrolled in a University in an artificial island east of Japan- the International Clark City. Here I met a girl of famed origin, Celes Stella Reignsworth. I was expecting another mundane school year, but that was not the case. The moment I agreed to form the pact with Lacrimosa, I was somewhat foolish to think that everything will be the same, I should have expected that none will remain deescalated.
And now, here I am, together with the so-called Prima Donna, in the rooftop of a vast building both having someone powerful at our side, claiming themselves as deities, wielders of immense authority that could outmaneuver natural laws at will.
Huh? Why the flashbacks now?
Is this what they call ”memory-flashes-before-you-make-your -final-exit-in-life”?
Hopefully, it's not.
(...)
”Too bad though, that this meeting would be our first and last.” The phantom deity said while taking off his right hand's glove, signaling that a major conflict is in its brink. In my mind, Carl Orff's Carmina Burana is playing in the highest volume, a classical composition that would best describe the predicament that I am in.
”Teheee. I can see you never changed there Deus Ex. So quick to judge and hasty in making decisions. Moreover, it's also understandable. You are nothing but an empty cog machine, unable to think independently”, Lacrimosa answered, without a taint of fear nor a minuscule feeling of being intimidated by the threat of the opposing deity. The line, however, made me realize that this encounter is not to be taken lightly.
However, Lacrimosa's there, with complete confidence in her face. I wonder where this would lead me?
And still, in the myriad of questions in the queue, one thing is certain though, that this is troublesome. How I wish to turn back time and just go to an electronics store to buy second-hand technological essences from the pocket money from my conservative grandma. Unfortunately, that is not happening.
In both my physical and mental weariness, what I find interesting to think about is accordance with Celes, who is designated to be a 'Herrscher' of the proclaimed Phantom. Unfortunately, what that means is something I know nothing of.
I wonder how Celes is reacting? Is she somewhat as confused as I am? Does she also find this a little bit too superficial?