Chapter 355 - Wanted To Die (1/1)

Chapter 355 - Wanted To Die

Lin Yan's life has always revolved around his fa his farandmother sent him to the Fu faet the tiot any tis when he ran away fro on his bed, Lin Yan wanted to cry, cry until he couldn't cry any those h and all the assorted ache that he had in his heart was now bursting through his heart He had once left it all behind but now his past was catching up to hi his face as he thought about what he needed to do fro Su Wan the truth - it wasn't possible The truth she wouldn't be able to bear it, He himself couldn't bear it - there were times when he wished he died under the hands of that wouilty of his existence

But even his death wouldn't have been able to save him because death in the hands of Luo Xin would haveto do

Lin Yan had countless thoughts, a part of hi but the other half was too scared to see her disgusted gaze - he couldn't, he could never accept being hated by her That would be as good as killing him - if Su Wan despised hie a knife in his heart and end his suffering for once and for all

And truthfully, he wouldn't even blame her on the contrary he would thank her!

And to think this was just beginning! Luo Xin hadn't even co of the most painless way to die

How funny!

Lin Yan chuckled, ahis lips " ah how ht?" he didn't remember the exact timeline because he didn't want to remember it at all But he did remember Luo Xin, thin and ed to hide her age with all the make-up she applied? Her hair has always been tied up in a chignon, her cheekbones were sharp enough to kill someone and her eyes - God her eyes, even their memory made hi-suppressed memory wrenched itself out of the lid he had placed on thoseand Luo Xin was sitting in front of hiarments as she played and pressed hisinto his body as she spread her legs " pick it up" she has said as she motioned to the jade cylindrical stick " and thrust it in - remember to thrust it well or else I would have to return the favour"

Lin Yan had been sick, sick to his core He was sent as a menial worker, not as a boy toy of course he couldn't do what she asked and as the result? She returned the way

Even now just thinking about it made his entire body burn with e on his four, butt naked, his ass spread apart and so to rear words still rang in his mind

" you worry me Yan, such a small job and you couldn't even do that? What a shame- let me teach you how it's done So you won't ain "

Lin Yan laid back down, as humiliation washed over him He covered his face and warers, no he could never tell Su Wan that, even if his life was hanging by a thread he wouldn't tell Su Wan that, because even he couldn't stop but hate hi that, how can he expect Su Wan to keep loving hied to save his chastity but lost everything else

Everything he had was gone, even his chastity was dirty - like a broken chastity

-

Lin Yan knew that he couldn't let anyone find out as going on in hishis spirits, he still walked out of his room and cooked an entire feast, like he was happy, normal and completely fine? He wasn't, every tiaze full of trust and love, He felt sick, nauseous and could hardly eat another bite

He didn't want to worry Su Wan and thus forced himself to eat his share For the first ti at their house because if he wasn't here then tonight was his chance to sleep with Su Wan - with his current condition, how can he bring himself to look at Su Wan? Much less touch her? Even if he forces hi her - his past was catching up and his sickness was acting up

Throughout the dinner, Lin Yan ignored Lin Jing's gaze and avoided looking at his elder brother all together? And it ith a rather alarrace that he cleaned up the table and went to the backyard to clean the dishes

The snoas still just as thick as it was in the ht? Lin Yan looked at the falling snow, and sighed - right noanted to lock himself up and sleep but maybe he wouldn't be able to sleep at all Luo Xin's memories will haunt him - he was certain of that, he couldn't sleep alone because he was afraid but he couldn't even sleep with someone either - his situation was so troublesome!

Lin Yan picked one of the dirty bowls and started cleaning when so fro thein its ith a loud 'thwack!'