Chapter 14 (1/2)

Vremya frowned. His home, which he had worked so hard to build—okay, it didn’t take any effort at all to build it, but still—had been invaded by furred creatures: Karta, the god of potato chips, Sush Kal, the god of dried squid snacks, and Vodor, the god of seaweed snacks. After the fiasco at the snack gods’ meeting, Karta invited her friends over to examine the spoils, the spoils meaning the two titan carcasses. It wasn’t every day a god could see a titan carcass, especially not snack gods like them.

“It’s actually firmer than it looks,” Karta said, her paw pressing against the dead titan. Well, it wasn’t really dead. According to Vremya, the titan was just frozen in time—forever.

Sush Kal, the little corgi, placed her paw on the dead titan as well. She gulped and ran her paw up and down one of the titan’s tentacles. “If I made a dried squid snack out of this tentacle….”

“Don’t even think about it,” Vodor said. The golden retriever placed her paw on the corgi’s head. “If you fed this to anyone in the lower dimension, they’d explode.”

Sush Kal blinked. “They’d still be able to taste it before exploding, right? That’s all that matters.”

“We’re not going to waste a tentacle like that,” Karta said and rolled her eyes, speaking as if the corpse belonged to her. “With enough refinement, this tentacle could be an extremely strong weapon! If you fed some moron a tentacle, they’d explode, and you’d get a little bit of divine energy, but if you gave some moron the tentacle as a weapon, they’d be able to force as many people as they wanted into eating dried squid snacks.”

“It says here that the blood of a titan can be used to enhance a lower lifeform’s cultivation,” Vremya said, pointing at his display. “If I were to start a leveling system, this would be a good material, right?”

Karta nodded. “It’s great for the latter half of cultivation,” she said. “Getting there is going to be extremely expensive though.” She frowned. “It might be better to sell these corpses on the marketplace and use the spirit stones to buy things for your cooking system.”

“Oh?” Vremya raised an eyebrow. His hand swiped against his holographic display. Upon seeing the price of a titan corpse, his eyes bulged. “Five hundred thousand heaven-grade spirit stones!? What the hell do I need a cooking system for? I should go out there and slaughter titans!”

The three dogs exchanged glances with each other. Vodor whispered, “Why doesn’t he just do that?”

Sush Kal glanced at Karta. “You said you introduced him to systems to make money, right? It really does make a lot more sense for him to hunt titans.”

“How the hell was I supposed to know the naked old man wearing a fanny pack was actually a really strong person?” Karta bared her teeth. “Just look at him. He’s so skinny in some areas and pudgy in others. Does he remind you of a warrior at all?”

A vein bulged on Vremya’s forehead. “I can hear everything you’re saying.”

Karta sighed and tears pooled up in her eyes. “Life’s not fair.”

“Huh?” Vremya blinked at the unexpected response.

“Us snack gods struggle so hard just to make a living, and primordial gods like you don’t have to struggle at all!”

The corgi and golden retriever bobbed their heads as well. “He’s a whale while we’re just some free-to-play plebs,” Vodor said and sighed.

“Whale? Free to play?” Vremya opened his Poiskle app and did a quick search. After reading the results, he couldn’t help but agree. If he could get regular cash infusions by killing titans and selling their corpses, he could skip so many steps. The cooking system took a long time to start making money, but if he spent a hefty amount of spirit stones, he could skip the slow beginning and get straight to the money-making portion. All he had to do was buy a few cooking golems, and he could open branches throughout the lower dimension without having to worry about cultivating a user. However, after taking a moment to think about it, Vremya calmed down. “Even though I can take a shortcut to making money, I won’t.”

Sush Kal turned towards Karta. “I’ve been thinking this for a while, but is he a moron?”