Chapter 9: The Blade, Not The Right Tool For That Job (1/2)

I got the fire started with minimal risk to my life being applied. Jilly had thrown a couple of the long boards at me, but they went wide, completely missing me.

”Look, the more you mess around with your vain attempts to kill me, the longer it will take to get the meat down,” I said as I walked over to the fallen Rock Troll that I had killed.

”Mmm, maybe, but you have yet to show me anything that would make me less likely to want to eat you,” Jilly said while looking at me hungrily and licking her lips.

I ignored her; I was already having enough trouble as it was concentrating with Mary on my back. She had started licking the back of my neck, and I was having trouble staying focused as I walked over to the corpse.

This was the hard part now, and I needed to get the meaning of this thing quickly before Jilly decides that she doesn't want to wait for the meat. This woman was getting worse and worse as time went on, and I didn't want to keep relying on Mary to keep me from being eaten.

”Ooo, the Troll stinks! Do you really think burning it will make it less smelly?” Mary asked, after taking a break from licking my neck.

”I can't make promises, but I know that there are a couple different kinds of meat that are poisonous if you try to eat it raw or if it hasn't been cooked properly. This meat seems like it will follow the same rules, so we'll just have to wait and see,” I said as I cut a large portion of the monster's thigh up with my fancy knife.

The twelve-centimeter-long blade was beyond weird now. When I had pulled the knife out from my back belt, the blade started to peel like sheets of paper.

I was shocked at first and almost tossed the damn thing like I had just realized I had pulled a snake from behind my back and not a rabbit. I had a snake glued to me, so that analogy has kind of puttered, so I held on to the knife for a moment longer, and the rustling blades seemed to calm down.

I had approached the thigh of the monster and went to go skin the hairy thigh of the monster, the parts that weren't rock were covered in three centimeter long bristly gray hairs. I cut all the way around just above the knee and split a line down the top to be able to cut the hairy skin off just like any animal I had skinned.

As I started to skin it, the blade flayed apart again but then started to extend like ribbons. The knife split into four sections, and when I started to pull it through and around the leg, it was like cutting butter with barely any resistance.

Once I had finished making a complete circuit around, the meat sagged off the bone in three wavy-cut sheets. I moved about fifty centimeters up and then scooped up the stinking meat, which was smelling markedly worse than before now that the blood and flesh were exposed.

I was feeling less confident about my ability to make this taste better, but I could feel something dripping on my shoulder where Mary was resting her chin. I turned my head to find her cute face drooling dribbles of drool down on me.