Chapter 91: ~Registration.~ (2/2)

I take a seat at the table and pick one of the pens which are lying on it. Then I start to answer the questions as fast as possible. Every new page of questions makes me increasingly annoyed. This feels like some kind of psychological test!

It takes us an hour to complete the forms. Afterwards the old guy takes his time with ticking off a list of his own while reading our papers.

“What's this for anyway?” Celestial starts to play with one of the pens.

Lidith coughs and starts her explanation. “It's a psychological test to identify your divinities. You already found out that your powers as a god have something to do with the state of your mind. Knowing your divinities helps you to increase your powers. Mine are peacefulness and madness for example. Most gods have two, but there are also cases with one or more. And they can change over time with the state of your mind. So don't take them to be set in stone.”

Jazira's expression becomes worried. “Madness? You never seemed like someone troublesome to me.”

“That's important information! Couldn't you have told us sooner?” Celestial snaps.

I nod with vigour. “That's very important. How could you forget about something like that.”

Lidith starts to scratch the back of her head and laughs insincerely. “You don't have to worry. My madness status isn't a hindrance to my interactions with other people. And I am sorry for not telling. It has been a long time since they took my profile. ~I kinda forgot, Tehehehe.~”

“I am done.” The old fart smiles at us with a troubled expression. “How about starting with the least troublesome person? Jazira?”

“~Yes!~” Jazira steps forward.

He hands a small card to the Immortal Empress. “Jazira the Eternal. Your divinities are a wish to control others and a very strong desire for safety. There is also a small potential to become a megalomaniac.”

“Th... that can't be! I desire peace over anything else!” Jazira stares at the card.

The old fart shrugs his shoulders. “That may be so, but I am good at my job. To create peace is just a pretence for you to exert your power over others. Creating a peaceful world assists your unconscious wish for safety. Probably some bad things happened to you in the past and now you prefer to hit others before they can do something to you.”

Jazira drops to the ground with a dead expression on her face. I swear that I could almost see her soul leave her body. The old fart is a dangerous one! He defeated Jazira with words alone!

“Now Celestial the Wilful.” He hands another card to my wife. “You are an -S- and a nymph! You have all the right characteristics for a dominatrix! Furthermore your sense for family is very...”

*swish*

A few pearls of sweat form on the old farts forehead. Celestial's pen passed right next to his ear and impacted the wall. I can feel a deadly killing intent right next to me.

Celestial reaches for the stack of paper in his hand and starts to rip it thoroughly. “~I think we all can live a happier life if we forget about this!~”

He nods and turns towards me with a third card. I glare at the old fart and he gulps. “Ascathon the Bright One!”

Now that doesn't sound so bad at least.

Then he starts to speak fast. “You are a very big -S-! On top you have great potential as a -M-! There is also a female side of yours which you are trying to deny with all your might. This gives you superior skills with the other gender, because you can actually imagine things from their point of v...”

…

I blink. The strange card is in my hand. “Ascathon the Bright One. That doesn't sound too bad.” Then my eyes wander to the old fart. He has his right arm bent the wrong way and his face looks beaten up. His nose is crooked and his upper lip is swollen. The left eye is rapidly changing colour to an unhealthy red.

There is a dent with the shape of the old fart's face in the wall right behind him.

“What the hell happened to you?”

“Noth... Nothing! It w... was a pl... easure. Goodbye!”

I look around and find the three girls huddling in a corner of the room. “What's wrong? What are you doing there?”

Celestial takes a deep breath and gets up. Five big steps take her to my side and she grabs my hand to pull me up.

“~Nothing happened honey bear! Let's go and have some fun at the party!~”

“It's still strange. I think I had something like a blackout...” I don't remember that the old fart gave me the card. And what happened to him?

“~Aahaha! No need to worry.~” She gives me a kiss and smiles. “We'll simply forget what happened in this room.”

“But.”

“~I love you. Nothing else counts.~”

“But.”

“~Not. Important!~”

She pulls me out of the room while I look back at the old fart who waves at us with a relieved expression.

.