Chapter 114 (1/2)
WARNING: The author bashes Japan (& other countries, but mostly Japan) a lot in this chapter. I have included a warning before the majority of it and a tldr at the end of the section if you wish to skip it.
I had a ceremonial cape draped over my entire body and my head supported a phoenix crown weighing three catties. It painfully pressed down and I felt like my neck could snap at any moment. Under the protection of an assembly of respectful palace eunuchs, I took calm and collected steps with the distinctive gracefulness and noble bearing of an empress into Xuan De Hall.
The New Year’s banquet was currently being held in the main hall with civil and military officials neatly sitting on either side. Upon my arrival, they all stood up to salute.
Xuanyuan Zong Zhi’s head bore the golden dragon crown and he sported the dazzling dragon robes, his entire person radiating with the dignity of the emperor He faintly smiled at my entrance and rose from the Dragon Throne to lead me to it, where we sat down, side by side.
I don’t remember when it was established, but the Empress of Tian Chu had the right to engage in politics and her authority in morning court was no less than the Emperor’s.
Half a year ago when our large household had returned from traveling the world, we were greeted with an imperial edict from the old emperor regarding inheritance. Despite never taking the position of Crown Prince, Zong Zhi had been directly appointed from his title as the Prince of Qi to the eminent status of the Emperor. I naturally then became Empress.
Shi Yi’s position as the principal husband could not be shaken. The old Emperor had finally understood that and conceded. Thus, Zong Zhi became the sole emperor in the history of Tian Chu to ascend the throne as a concubine. But no one dared to look down on him. Shortly after his ascension, he punished an entire faction of dishonest courtiers. From then on, whatever the Emperor ordered, his loyal subjects obeyed.
Xuan De Hall was luxuriant, with sixty-four large chandeliers suspended from the ceiling that illuminated the hall as if it was day. Indeed, it was a dazzling array of light that painted the room in glorious splendor.
Imperial banquets were naturally grand, breathtaking, refined, and luxurious; otherwise, they wouldn’t be able to display the imperial family’s prestige and honor.
I caught sight of Yun Shi Yi among the subjects. He was currently watching me with eyes expressing his affection. Lightly smiling at him, my eyes wandered. Min Zhi, Shi Wei, Jing Yan–they were also all among the crowd. Jing Yan was currently the prime minister, Shi Wei was the head of the Bureau of Military Affairs, and Min Zhi had entered the Hall of Government Affairs.[a]
After I became Empress, Shi Yi seldom went on long voyages. Even if he had to travel overseas, it would only be to the several small countries near the coast. He was currently the one who called the shots in Tian Chu’s markets, with wealth that rivaled a nation’s. But he donated the majority of it to charity and was highly regarded in both Tian Chu and the surrounding countries.
“Greetings to His Imperial Majesty and Her Imperial Majesty.” The leads were present. Under the loud cry of the palace eunuch in charge of ceremony and etiquette, all the attendees stood up and performed the rites.
“Rise, my dear officials, and be seated!” Zong Zhi’s crisp voice rang out, but it seemed to contain a gloominess and depth that revealed a venerated emperor’s aura amidst its indifference.
I glanced at the delicacies on the table, my lips faintly pressing into a lovely smile. Ever since Shi Yi led the merchants to call for plants to be grown in greenhouses, the average commoner could also eat fresh vegetables in the wintry twelfth lunar month.
I saw quite a few court officials swallow their saliva, most likely hungry. But the Son of Heaven hadn’t touched his chopsticks thus no one dared to have a taste. I wanted to discreetly remind Zong Zhi, but he directed some words towards Xiao Xi Zi, who was by his side: “The foreign envoys may have their audience now.”
Every New Year, summoning the foreign delegates for an audience was a mandatory event at the imperial banquet.
“All envoys may have an audience with His Imperial Majesty of the Celestial Empire, the holy Son of Heaven.” Xiao Xi Zi’s shrill voice passed down the Emperor’s order, where it then traveled from the imperial guards on duty by the entrance to post after post, passing the order farther and farther……
Approximately half a quarter hour later, a group of several hundred people entered the main hall. It seemed they had rehearsed this before as they walked in a very orderly fashion. All sorts of clothing could be seen in the formation, just like an exhibition on the dress of minority and ethnic groups.
Tian Chu’s diplomatic relations had widened considerably with the strengthening of the age of navigation. Our envoys had spread to most of the nations on this continent and traveled to Fusang in the east, and to Da Qin, South Africa, and even the Americas in the west. Nearly all races could be found in this hall.
“Long live His Imperial Majesty, the holy Son of Heaven, long live niang niang.” The envoys shouted in stiff Mandarin and uniformly kneeled.
Zong Zhi swept his eyes over the dense crowd before him a few times before indifferently ordering: “All may rise!”
“Many thanks to His Imperial Majesty, the holy Son of Heaven. Many thanks to niang niang. Long live, long live.” The envoys had all been trained in etiquette by the Ministry of Rites and deeply bowed with lowered heads, their attitude reverent and respectful, not even daring to flick their eyes upwards for a quick glance.
From that, I could see how impressive Tian Chu was, and couldn’t help but to sigh. If modern China was half as domineering as Tian Chu was, then they wouldn’t be fighting over the Diao Yu Islands with Japan for decades. The year I transmigrated, the problem was still unresolved.[b]
Following that was the presentation of gifts brought by each country’s respective envoys. Xiao Xi Zi called out each nation in turn from a list in his hands.
“The envoy from Gan Pu offers twenty pieces of high-quality emerald jadeite and ten pieces of red jadeite. The envoy from Xian Luo offers a gold pagoda with nine sections and a depiction of Guan Yin carved from jade. The envoy from Gao Li offers ten tiger hides, fifty fine Mongolian horses……”
Hearing Gao Li mentioned, I recalled that modern-day South Korea had a thicker skin than the land, claiming the Dragon Boat Festival, Mid-Autumn Festival, and the four great Chinese inventions were theirs, and that they were the origin of humans in the Eastern Hemisphere and the primogenitor of ancient Chinese civilization.[c] Being shameless to this degree was truly sickening.
“The envoy of the country of Wo offers twenty Wo swords……”
Hearing the country of Wo mentioned, I was startled for it was actually Japan. Ancient Japan was poor, backwards, and covered in tattoos, just like savages. Despite receiving assistance from the Tang dynasty, they were located in the far corner of the East Sea so transportation and communication was inconvenient. Their situation had improved, it wasn’t enough.
This Wo blade was actually a technique from the Tang dynasty, and the sharpness of a Tang sword was unmatched. In my original space-time, the Tang blade technique vanished during the wars of the Five Dynasties and Ten Kingdoms, but became famous in the islands of Japan. Later in history, how many Chinese did the Japanese slaughter with the weapons of the Tang dynasty?!
Xiao Xi Zi finished reading from the gift list and deferentially bowed before the Emperor and Empress.
“To all delegates, if you have a matter to discuss, please speak frankly. Those without issues, please withdraw to the side hall and enjoy the banquet.” Zong Zhi gave me a glance. Perhaps seeing that I wasn’t in too good of a mood, he spoke in a manner that was almost dismissive.
***If you don’t want to read the author insult Japan through RZ, skip this section.***
(It’s long. Really long.)
But it was hard for the envoys to meet with the emperor, so how could they have nothing to say? The first to harden his resolve and step forward was the envoy of Wo. Performing the rites, his clear voice sounded: “This humble envoy of Wo, Official Xiao Quan salutes His Majesty, the Holy Son of Heaven and salutes niang niang. Since the formation of the dynasty, my humble country has been a close friend of the Celestial Empire and claimed itself as loyal subjects of the Celestial Empire. Presently, this son is facing difficulty and beseeches our mother nation for assistance.”
Zong Zhi was taken aback: “What troubles are you facing?”
Hearing the Emperor’s question, Official Xiao Quan eagerly lurched forward, buttocks jolting. He only stopped when Xiao Zhou Zi barked out Impudent! and then continued in an overly fawning manner: “Your Majesty, niang niang, my humble country urgently needs experts and books regarding farming, medicine, architecture, and other fields from the Celestial Empire. The virtues of the holy Son of Heaven are widely spread, lighting up ten thousand li. His Majesty will surely not allow the people of my humble country to suffer.”
The more I heard, the more furious I became. Our ancestors had allowed these ungrateful bastards to learn our advanced techniques and theories and then they turned around and killed us.
“Quiet!” I didn’t wait for Zong Zhi to speak and coldly denied Official Xiao Quan: “How could such a lowly official like you be allowed to act so presumptuously in my Tian Chu’s Great Hall? Someone come! Have him expelled.”
The Wo envoy was nothing to look at. At less than 1.6 meters tall and with bow legs, he looked utterly wretched. I knew from reading my past world’s history books that the majority of Japanese prior to World War II generally had this kind of trait. Later, after seeing Westerners drink milk to enhance their characteristics, the Japanese Prime Minister had his countrymen drink milk every day to improve their constitutions. As expected, after a few decades, the bow-legged defect became rare in the Japan.
Please forgive me for judging someone by their appearance, but no one would be happy when confronted with a country that was formerly their enemy.
The imperial guards knew my command was tantamount to one issued by Zong Zhi and stepped forward from their posts to force Xiao Quan out without waiting for the sacred order to be issued.
“Niang niang, what mistake has this foreign subject committed? Please state it clearly, do not let this foreign subject be made to exit in confusion.” Xiao Quan shouted and knelt on the ground, refusing to rise.
I halted the guards and rebuked the Wo envoy: “You should have looked for a mirror before you came. A repugnant appearance like yours with a head like a buck and eyes like a mouse[d] can still represent a country? It is evident you are looking down on my Tian Chu. To then dare be so impudent–have him taken out and beaten a hundred times.”
Xiao Quan straightforwardly cried out his injustices: “It turns out niang niang dislikes this foreign subject for being ugly. Confucius says: Judging someone by their appearance means losing Zi Yu.[e] This foreign subject has reached the conclusion that this subject does not have Zi Yu’s great talents, but this subject is very familiar with the Book of Songs and the Book of Histories and proficient in many schools of thought. Hoping niang niang will see that this foreign subject’s heart is full of loyalty towards the Celestial Empire and pardon this subject. If niang niang thinks this subject is too ugly, this subject will change to a beautiful one to greet niang niang tomorrow.”
Fury overwhelmed me, making my head spin. This damned Japanese devil was too inhuman. Did he think I’d go into heat at the sight of an attractive man and rush to take him into my harem? His goddamned island was filled with either female prostitutes or male gigolos, absolutely filthy!
Zong Zhi held my hand underneath the table and whispered: “Zhu’er, there is no need to anger yourself over this insolent man. I will have him punished later as an outlet for your anger and then send him back to Wo.”
The other envoys regretted that Xiao Quan had scrambled to be the first to respond to the holy Son of Heaven and were currently full of envy. Seeing him suffer to this extent, schadenfreude oozed from their eyes.
I noticed the gentle smile Shi Yi was directing towards me. My heart immediately warmed and the rage that had overtaken me mostly snuffed out.
Xiao Quan was not dumb. Realizing that he had spoken wrongly, he hastily kowtowed in trepidation.
I cleared my throat: “Listen, Xiao Quan. Since the previous dynasty, your country has received quite a few benefits from my Tian Chu, taking a generous amount of medical knowledge, military tactics, agricultural methods and skills, and even artisans. Now even your country’s capital imitates the architecture of my Celestial Empire. It is because we have given you too much that we cannot give any more.”
Xiao Quan was stunned and forgot to be afraid: “Niang niang, the subjects of my humble country needs your distinguished nation’s medical skills to treat diseases and also needs the method to your high-yield rice paddies. The Celestial Empire is the mother nation; how could you look on as your people starve?”
I was surprised: “How would our Tian Chu look on as your country’s people starve? Xiao Quan, why are you speaking nonsense with clear eyes? Tian Chu merchant trips carry foodstuffs, silk, porcelain, tea leaves, and a great deal of luxury goods to Wo each year. What are your eyes for?”
“But, but niang niang, those need to be bought?” Xiao Quan mumbled. Not knowing how to respond, he unexpectedly spoke foolishly.
All of the court ministers bristled with anger, and Shi Wei coldly sneered: “Do you mean Wo should reap without sowing and have the Celestial Empire provide offerings?”