448 444. Real hell.txt (2/2)

'I really believe that time is going to solve this, and I believe in you all! So, one day, really, we can all be 'happy' together!　I promise!

People's feelings are depressed.

There is nothing in this world that is immutable.

That seems to be one of Rustiala's values, but I didn't like that - I felt like this 'constriction' of mine was also being told that it wasn't eternal, and I didn't like that a little bit.

But I know that if Rustiala were alive, I would surely say this.

No matter how long I keep looking at Rustyala, she'll say the second word, 'We're all in this together' and look away.

And I know that.

There are emotions that are stirred up because I know it.

I know it myself, but it's not clean.

It's viscous, feverish and red, and something that's about to crawl out of me at any moment - it's not clean.

Is that where Rastiara is?

I heard the voice of a third party interrupting our world alone.

I hurriedly turned my attention to someone other than Rustyala.

Before I know it, a man with short blue hair is standing in front of me, gazing at the destination I'm staring at.

It's Serdra, the one who steals the truth of nothingness.

He is smiling with his mouth twisted like a half-moon.

The current state of affairs is new to him as he is bored with it. His vices are in full swing, but I and Rustyala can't speak for others either, so I won't complain about it.

The question now was more important to me.

Is Rastiara here? Or is he not here?

Yes. Yes, I'm sure of it.

I answered immediately.

Hearing this, Serdra frowned and claimed with an expression that was hard to understand.

But after staring at the empty space for a few seconds, she sighed with a smile.

'...... Oh. If you believe in it now, you must really be there. I'll believe it too.

Not only did I not deny it, I strongly affirmed it.

However, the reason for that seems to be a little different than mine. I would add a little bit more because I feel like it's an awe of the overwhelming power of being able to control even the soul now.

I'm not that deep, it's just a 'curse'. I'm just talking to Rustyala to pay for the 'constriction' as well.

What's more, it also serves as a test run for skills such as my returned 'parallel thinking' and newly acquired 'writing' skills.

However, my light-hearted attitude seems to be an additional fear for Serdra.

Scratching the back of her head raggedly, she tries to reaffirm the abnormality of the 'curse'.

'It's just a 'curse' ......, as it might be to you ....... Let me tell you, it was an amazing sight. You, who only I can see, talking to yourself endlessly. I even questioned my sanity and couldn't move for a few minutes.

As I know, everything up to this point is a 'hallucination', and it's not sane in the eyes of others. Even now, in ”My World”, Rustyala is talking to Seldra, ”It's been a long time. It's been a long time since I died...”, but unless I speak for her, she will never reach me.

As it is, I can't have a conversation with her, so I return to the reality of sitting alone on the couch at the eleventh crossroads and talk to Seldra.

'...... Yeah, I know exactly what I'm talking about. That's why he's hiding behind magic like this and trying to talk. I try not to talk to Rustyala in front of everyone. I did it in front of Ryner once, and he was very worried about me.

That's better. I'm used to that kind of madness, but this is a little traumatic for me. A normal person would never be able to handle this.

'I mean, that's what I was talking about in the first place, but I'm surprised you managed to find me. Even Snow, who is very good at detecting things, can't get past my 'covert' anymore.

'Oh come on, don't compare me to that lazy bastard. I'm the guy who caught the first 'The One Who Stole the Reason of the Dimension' Noi twice, you know?　I'm really good at exploration and scouting and stuff like that to begin with.

There is no pretense in that Seldora boast.

I have recovered all my memories, and I can remember what happened a thousand years ago like a book.

I know the real work of the past Seldora did in the enemy country.

Of course, if you're serious now, it won't be so easy. If you use Dimension, you'll be caught off guard before you even get close.

Serdra asked me to confirm something.

There's no reason to hide it, so I answer honestly.

I don't use Dimension all the time anymore. That's why I didn't notice Seldra's approach just now. I'm done with being ...... nervous all the time.

'Are you sure you're not using ......?　Not even a little?

It's because it lets everyone's privacy slip through the cracks. ”It's too tiring to try to avoid the privacy that lies within the Dimension. Then we've decided that it's better not to use it at all.

Pray-beak?　Oh, you mean personal secrets. Sure, that's important.

So I don't 'magically look at other people's private lives' anymore.

Foul magic is no longer necessary for me.

He tries to reassure Serdra by declaring it forcefully.

But that declaration was too powerful, and it seems that Seldora, the 'one who steals the reason', felt a special weight. He is wary, as if he has been told of a new [World's Truth].

''Don't worry, that's not a reason or anything right now, it's just my rules. I'm not doing the 'deal' anymore because I'm sick of the 'curse' and the 'price'. ...... Seldora can feel the 'world' too, can't he?

Saying that, I didn't turn around and pointed towards the gaze (...) I felt from behind me.

Seldora glared at the 'slit' that would be beyond it.

''Thinly. It's true that magic power doesn't come and go as a result of your earlier declaration. That's a rule that only applies to you.

'That's what I mean. ...... And yet, if it's thin, even in Seldora, does the intensity of the gaze change based on the preference of the 'world'?　By the way, me and Rustyala seems to be a remarkable story, and it's been on my radar ever since that 'last battle' ended.

You're being watched. Don't let you bring Rastiara back to life.

'There's no hostility of that sort at all. Just enjoying the continuation of this Lastiara story with us ....... So it's tricky.

We've been liked by the 'world'.

The important thing here is that they like Rustyala more than me.

The World” is looking at ”Rustyala's protagonist” now, not ”Aikawa Uzumi”. I have a lot of sympathy for this hobby. He is a man who is in tune with my tastes, and that's why I'm in a lot of trouble.

It's a good thing that you're able to get the most out of this.

He continues with the confirmation that is his purpose.

'Enjoying it, or ....... Is that your goal from now on, Kanami?

Yeah. From now on, I'm going to have a normal 'adventure'. Like the 'hero' of Rastiara.

Once the reconstruction of the Allies is finished, the next step will be to focus on the 'adventure' of saving the world.

Getting rid of the debts of Yangtaki and Tiara is important, but it will be useless if the world, the foundation of the project, is destroyed.

For that reason, I'll have to conquer the 'labyrinth' that I've created by myself.

To be honest, my motivation is not very high.

The author of ”Labyrinth” is myself, so it feels like a match pump, or the level is too unrewarding because it's a must-have, and the reward for clearing the game, the ”Deepest part”, is not appealing to me.

As the mastermind behind the Labyrinth, I know what's out there.

I'm sure you'll be able to find a way to make your wish come true by using the faucet of a magical stone or magic formula to the water source of infinite magical power. --The only thing is that it's anything but my true wish.

I'm in a magic lamp state where only I can't use it, so even though I've been rushed by Apostle Di Prakra many times, this is how my free time is being used for dates.

............

Seldora continued to watch me closely.

It's a gaze similar to the ”world”.

It looks like he is expecting something from me.

I'm not going to be able to get the same thing for you.

When you cross the memories of a thousand years ago and the actions of a thousand years later, the answer is faint, but it's answered. That's what his boss, Titi, had said, too.

I apologize, sensing that Seldra wants to check in with me most today.

'I'm sorry, Seldra. Your trip to the 'other world' will have to wait a little longer. I need to practice my magic for the safety of the trip.

'What about ......?'　”A trip to 'another world'?

'What?　Serdra wants to go to ”Other World” ...... and go to the world where me and Yotaki were born, right?　Yangtaki's magic, the Replace Connection.

In The Last Battle, Yotaki tried to escape to the Original World using the magic Replace Connection. I can learn that magic from Yotaki's magic stone.

Of course, that 'magic formula' is complicated for my sister, and it won't be so easy to imitate.

It's not just a matter of time before you're able to get your hands on it.

That's why I was talking about wanting to experiment beforehand, considering the risk of failure and side effects. ...... It didn't seem to be in Serdra's mind, and it was crisp.

'Oh, oh ....... That's right. Because that magic was my reward, I was following Yotaki, albeit temporarily. There's no doubt about that.

I wonder and I confirm.

Of course, it's not a skill 'reading' or a magic 'thread', but a verbal confirmation.

'Tity told me before. He said that Serdra gets bored easily and that she always seems to be smiling and not laughing. ...... 'You want to 'escape' because you're bored in 'your world', right?　I've been thinking for a thousand years that I want to find fun things to do over there and feel as 'happy' as people do.

............!

The 'Stealers of Reason' that I've fought against so far have all had modest hopes for the end of their grandiose wishes.

In line with that rule of thumb, I tried to point it out in my own way, but it seemed to hit the core of the matter more than I imagined.

Serdra was very upset and couldn't find the words to deny it.

'At least, I promise you that I'm not far off.

'I'll definitely thank you. Seldra has helped me in so many ways.

'Ta, thank God. ......?　What are you talking about?　I was lured by the reward of Yotaki's ”Replacement Connection” and I was complicit in the killing of your lover?

Seldora shook his head in disbelief.

This is where my many doubts are put to rest.

Apparently, she was wary of me avenging Lastiara's death.

While reaffirming the importance of building up dialogue, I thank her again.

'I'm grateful as an older brother for taking my sister's side. It's the same with Rustyala, who wanted to save Yotaki. We are really grateful to Serdra for standing by Yotaki alone, even if she became our enemy,

So there is no way we could ever resent Seldra.

I told him solemnly, and he finally seemed to understand.

Serdra replies, patting his chest.

' ...... It helps to hear you say that. It makes me feel better, if only a little better.''

He didn't seem to be convinced somehow.

Maybe he couldn't forgive himself, even if he was forgiven by others.

In fact, he even seems to be ashamed of himself for having been forgiven.

-- Perhaps this is the core of The One Who Steals the Reason of Nothingness, Seldra.

The basic premise is that he hates himself.

So no matter how bright and friendly the place is, all the time, only 'my world' remains dim, stagnant and sunken, and nothing changes.

I felt like I knew that feeling, too.

It's hard to work hard and fight and fight and fight, and the only thing waiting for you at the end of it is emptiness.

So I praise him as best I can instead of Seldra.

'Seldra is truly admirable ....... He always tried to be an equal and on everyone's side. He continued to try to be a good person, no matter what the situation was. Even if it wasn't for his own pleasure, he continued to work hard for the world and others. I can assure you that the results of that effort have led to the current development of the Allied nations. But in spite of all that--

Serdra worked hard, fought and fought, and helped those around her in her own way.

Despite having unreasonable 'innate differences', he continued to try to 'adapt' to human society.

And yet, not a single thing has changed in the 'World of Seldora'. That's hard, isn't it? It's really hard.

The harder you work, the more 'happy' the people around you become, little by little.

But Seldom does he get anything, and he is not satisfied. --Life is not pleasant at all (・・・・・).

When I sympathize with the emptiness of his life, Seldora is surprised and looks as if he has been saved from hell. I almost gave her a hearty smile as a sympathizer appeared for her long-standing problem.

Just as quickly, Seldra shook her head.

A very small voice, but he called out the name of one of his companions and reminded himself.

”'Fafner (・・・・・)' .......

I didn't use any skills or magic.

But now Seldra seemed to 'regret' remembering the boy who once tried to save all the 'demons', including the dragon man (Dragon Newt).

After all, it seems that just talking about it doesn't seem to get rid of the 'regrets'.

In particular, 'The One Who Steals the Reason of Nothingness' seems to be complicated and special.

It's probably due to the fact that unlike everyone else a thousand years ago, they were able to travel freely between the north and south.

The 'threads' are strung together everywhere, linked and intertwined, not easily unraveled.

I've already passed the most difficult part, the 100-layered ordeal.

But this 80-layered ”ordeal” can't be ignored.

I'm prepared to use my skills and magic not automatically but voluntarily.

That much room was made possible thanks to the 'constriction'.